Judge says man who raped sleeping woman is not a “classic rapist,” just “lost control”
“This was a case where you just lost control of normal restraint,” Judge Michael Mettyear continued in his assessment of Setford. ”She was a pretty girl who you fancied. You simply could not resist. You had sex with her.”
Not a classic rapist. Simply could not resist. Not a danger. This is everything that is wrong with how we view and talk about rape, and this is hardly an isolated incident. There are scripts that most people assume all rapes should follow, and roles that rapists and victims are both expected to play. The persistence of these myths about who counts as a “classic” rapist — and who makes for a good victim — is astonishing considering how much we know about perpetrators of sexual violence, particularly in the United States.
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And this erasure has consequences. It’s what allows ignorant people like George Will to pretend that most sexual assaults are just “ambiguities of the hookup culture.” It’s what allows politicians and law enforcement to ignore the experiences of survivors on college campuses, in the military, in prisons and every other place where sexual violence occurs. (Which is everywhere.) It dismisses the women and men who told their assailants “no,” but were ignored. The wives who told their husbands “no,” but were ignored. The sexual assaults that don’t involve a weapon, but instead feature much more insidious forms of coercion. This is what sexual violence really looks like, but these aren’t the stories we tell ourselves about sexual violence.
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http://www.salon.com/2014/07/03/judge_says_man_who_raped_sleeping_woman_is_not_a_classic_rapist_just_lost_control/
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the patriarchy have ruled for millennia??
while we dither and try to negotiate and find balance? 
That's okay then. 
Sid
Otherwise he wouldn't feel safe saying it.
Wouldn't feel like he owed the guy some kind of apology.
Wouldn't feel himself identifying/ sympathizing with the guy.
Women aren't really people in this mindset.
sounds so awesome you just can't help yourself?
surprised to see this is in the UK, but I guess this sort of idiocy can be anywhere - I thought it would be a relative of those teabaggers from a few years back - the "forcible rape" guy or the other guy that said a woman's body could shut down the pregnancy.
Can you impeach judges in the UK? This guy is obviously not fit for duty.
How would he feel if his daughter or wife were sleeping and some guy came along & just lost control around them?
Someone should check for the skeletons in this judge's closet. Since it's okay to 'fancy' a woman and have a sex with her while incapacitated.
Reminiscent of the court who threw out the case of a man who raped a disabled woman with the mind of a child who had cerebral palsy, because she did put up enough of a fight...
And a judge who let a middle aged guy off for raping a 6 year old girl years ago.
The judge claimed she 'seduced' the man and was 'promiscuous.' I never forgot that one.
This is rape culture. And yes, every woman knows.
It sickens me, disgusts me ... but no longer surprises me 
