Mon May 12, 2014, 01:46 AM
AllenVanAllen (3,134 posts)
DUer 'onestepforward' has passed away.
I'm Terri onestepforward's husband Gabriel Marquez and I wanted to let her DU family know she committed suicide last Thursday and I am utterly devastated. She made DU a daily part of her life and she learned so much and made such wonderful connections here over the past few years. She appreciated how important and wonderful this place really is and it was very special to her. It's hard for me to breathe right now but I did want to let her DU family know she LOVED all of you so, so much and I wanted to to convey my appreciation to you for all you gave her. You all meant so much to her. Thank you.
![]() ![]() Here's a link to her final DU post http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018614115 Once again, Thank you.
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254 replies, 37679 views
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Author | Time | Post |
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AllenVanAllen | May 2014 | OP |
Electric Monk | May 2014 | #1 | |
HangOnKids | May 2014 | #2 | |
JI7 | May 2014 | #3 | |
silverweb | May 2014 | #4 | |
RGinNJ | May 2014 | #5 | |
Paulie | May 2014 | #6 | |
Mnemosyne | May 2014 | #7 | |
nilram | May 2014 | #8 | |
Behind the Aegis | May 2014 | #9 | |
sheshe2 | May 2014 | #10 | |
BainsBane | May 2014 | #11 | |
polly7 | May 2014 | #12 | |
DesertRat | May 2014 | #13 | |
nadinbrzezinski | May 2014 | #14 | |
Hoyt | May 2014 | #15 | |
StarryNite | May 2014 | #16 | |
Le Taz Hot | May 2014 | #17 | |
Ichingcarpenter | May 2014 | #18 | |
TexasTowelie | May 2014 | #19 | |
Gravitycollapse | May 2014 | #20 | |
nomorenomore08 | May 2014 | #45 | |
Fearless | May 2014 | #21 | |
defacto7 | May 2014 | #22 | |
denbot | May 2014 | #23 | |
Duppers | May 2014 | #24 | |
Violet_Crumble | May 2014 | #25 | |
intaglio | May 2014 | #26 | |
No Vested Interest | May 2014 | #27 | |
RainDog | May 2014 | #28 | |
villager | May 2014 | #29 | |
MADem | May 2014 | #30 | |
awoke_in_2003 | May 2014 | #161 | |
mazzarro | May 2014 | #31 | |
barbtries | May 2014 | #32 | |
eridani | May 2014 | #33 | |
Solly Mack | May 2014 | #34 | |
Hekate | May 2014 | #35 | |
tofuandbeer | May 2014 | #36 | |
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KC | May 2014 | #49 | |
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meegbear | May 2014 | #255 |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:49 AM
Electric Monk (13,869 posts)
1. So sorry to hear that. R.I.P.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:52 AM
HangOnKids (4,291 posts)
2. Peace and Love
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:52 AM
JI7 (83,978 posts)
3. i'm so sorry
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:53 AM
silverweb (16,363 posts)
4. Oh, no...
[font color="navy" face="Verdana"]I'm so very sorry for your loss -- and sorry that I didn't really know her.
Thank you for letting us know. ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:53 AM
RGinNJ (833 posts)
5. I am very sorry. RIP
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:54 AM
Paulie (8,458 posts)
6. I'm so sorry!
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:56 AM
Mnemosyne (21,363 posts)
7. I am so very sorry, AVA.
Please be kind to yourself.
![]() I know. ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:57 AM
nilram (2,418 posts)
8. sorry for your loss, I so enjoyed that post
Last edited Wed May 14, 2014, 12:55 AM - Edit history (2) So sad for whatever onestepforward could not bear any longer and for your loss.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:00 AM
Behind the Aegis (47,485 posts)
9. I am very sorry for your loss.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:01 AM
sheshe2 (71,332 posts)
10. I am so very sorry for your loss.
RIP Terri.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:01 AM
BainsBane (46,287 posts)
11. I am so very sorry
What a tragedy. My thoughts are with you and the rest of her family and friends.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:01 AM
polly7 (20,582 posts)
12. I'm so very sorry.
Peace and strength to you and yours.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:02 AM
DesertRat (27,899 posts)
13. I'm so sorry, Gabriel
My thoughts and prayers are with you. Peace be with you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:03 AM
nadinbrzezinski (154,021 posts)
14. I am sorry for your loss
And if there is anything I can do, even if it is just moral support, do not hesitate to call for it. I am sure most people will not hesitate.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:05 AM
Hoyt (48,317 posts)
15. I am so sorry. I responded to that post of the beautiful fireflies.
I even sent the link to others.
My wife passed away unexpectedly a little over 5 years ago. Please let us know how you are doing. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:07 AM
StarryNite (6,426 posts)
16. I'm so very sorry.
R.I.P. Terri.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:07 AM
Le Taz Hot (22,271 posts)
17. Please accept our deepest condolences
to you and your family for this terrible loss. Please let us know if there is any way in which we can help ease your pain, even if just a little.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:10 AM
Ichingcarpenter (36,988 posts)
18. I'm sorry for your loss .. she will be missed on DU
You can see what she recommended and what she stood for....
I will miss her. RIP |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:11 AM
TexasTowelie (82,617 posts)
19. I'm so sad to read this news about Terri.
I'm also going through a tough period in my life and overdosed. She contacted me via DUmail at the end of last month and we exchanged a couple of messages that provided encouragement to me. She regularly posted on some of my OPs and I admired her as a kindred spirit.
I'm not very far away from your location and would be interested to attend a memorial service for her if any are being held. Please accept my deepest condolences and pass it along to her family also. I will miss seeing her posts on DU. ![]() ![]() ![]() I am going to cross-post this in the Texas Group since she was an active participant in that group so that others will see it. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:16 AM
Gravitycollapse (8,155 posts)
20. I don't know what to say. This is devastating. I hope you find respite from this storm...
in knowing that love never dies. It lives within us forever for as long as we give it residence.
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Response to Gravitycollapse (Reply #20)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:54 AM
nomorenomore08 (13,324 posts)
45. +1
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:22 AM
defacto7 (13,485 posts)
22. I am so sorry you have to walk through this...
What a terrible tragedy and a shock. Please be well. There is so little I can say but as a member of this community and the planet I wish you comfort, strength and the peace to move forward. Look to those fireflies.. follow the beauty of that moment.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:26 AM
denbot (8,896 posts)
23. I am very sorry for your loss.
No words can help. Her last post was passed to my wife, and she saved all the images and now are her wallpaper for both her work and private machines.
Again sorry for your loss. Peace |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:28 AM
Duppers (21,915 posts)
24. I am also so very sorry.
I know your pain is almost too much to bear right now, so keep reaching out when you can.
As someone else said, please be kind to yourself. You're what we, here, have left of Terri. {{{HUGS}}} |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:31 AM
Violet_Crumble (35,547 posts)
25. RIP Terri...
I'm so sorry for yr loss, Gabriel...
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:32 AM
intaglio (8,170 posts)
26. There's no comfort I can offer except share the weight
She loved you and us but the hellish illness of depression overcame her. Remember, you shared many good times and that you gave her the greatest gift - extended happiness.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:36 AM
No Vested Interest (4,603 posts)
27. So very sorry. I hope you will continue to find your way here
to DU, where solace is freely given to one's heartache.
I did not know Terri, but clearly she was special, and she will be missed. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:36 AM
RainDog (28,784 posts)
28. my deepest condolences
I'm so sorry, so very sorry to hear.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:39 AM
villager (26,001 posts)
29. What terrible, terrible news
Thank you for posting it here, as hard as that was to do.
Condolences, and please take care of yourself in this tough, tough time |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:39 AM
MADem (135,425 posts)
30. How horrific for you. I rec'd that post--thought the fireflies were quite amazing.
Can't imagine what you are feeling or how you're coping; suicide is something that the people left behind often have tremendous difficulty resolving in their minds. It's just not well understood, and it is terribly painful for family and friends. I am so sorry for your loss.
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Response to MADem (Reply #30)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:23 AM
awoke_in_2003 (34,582 posts)
161. As did I...
I haven't seen fireflys since I moved to Texas.
This is the DU member formerly known as awoke_in_2003.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:48 AM
mazzarro (3,450 posts)
31. So sorry about this - may she rest in peace
It is a tragedy that her DU family was not able to help her in her time of distress. My thoughts and prayers are with you and the rest of the family and friends.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:49 AM
barbtries (24,793 posts)
32. i am so sorry
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:50 AM
eridani (51,903 posts)
33. Sorry that you are going through this
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:53 AM
Solly Mack (82,272 posts)
34. I'm so sorry to hear this. I'm sorry for your loss.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:02 AM
Hekate (67,901 posts)
35. I'm so very sorry for you loss, AVA. May you find peace and healing for your pain...
... and may Terri rest in peace.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:07 AM
tofuandbeer (1,314 posts)
36. God. I'm sorry. Hold on dear Gabriel.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:15 AM
spooky3 (27,078 posts)
37. My sympathy to you.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:16 AM
davidpdx (22,000 posts)
38. Damn I really am sorry to hear that
I didn't know her unfortunately. We seem to be having a lot of deaths on DU lately.
I know how she feels and have been there on the edge way too many times. It makes me sad to hear about her passing. I hope someone will at the end of the year put together a photo montage of all the people we lost so we can be reminded. I always don't catch these types of notices and I'm sure many other's don't either unless they are here a lot. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:24 AM
murielm99 (27,701 posts)
39. I am so very sorry.
Please stay in touch with us. I don't know what else to say. Maybe we can be of some comfort to you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:29 AM
LibDemAlways (15,139 posts)
40. I am very saddened by this and hope that
memories of better days will help to sustain you and bring you comfort during this sad time and in the days, weeks, and months ahead. Sending sincere condolences and wishing you strength and peace.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:30 AM
MissDeeds (7,499 posts)
41. Oh my god
This breaks my heart. I am so sorry for you and your loss, and for the pain that dear "onestepforward" could not overcome. You both will be in my thoughts in the coming days.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:30 AM
area51 (9,295 posts)
42. I'm so sorry.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:36 AM
KT2000 (19,272 posts)
43. Oh no -
I remember that post. So very sad and I am so sorry for your loss.
![]() Peace to you. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:45 AM
Unknown Beatle (2,576 posts)
44. I am so sorry for your loss.
RIP Terri
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:56 AM
Tsiyu (18,186 posts)
46. I am so sorry to hear this
My oldest sons' dad did this as well. I spent a lot of years feeling guilty, thinking I could have done something. His own dad - who found him - helped me come to terms with that guilt. It's funny, I was just talking about her firefly thread a few hours ago. My daughter called today and was talking about friends from California being amazed by fireflies. I was telling my daughter about onestepforward's thread and how cool it was, and how from that thread I learned there aren't fireflies everywhere in the US. I could SEE the images she posted so clearly in my head as I was describing them to her. Then I click on that link to her last post and....just.......wow. Thank you for telling us about this horrible loss. Please reach out to DU if and when you need someone to lean on. DU is a very supportive place. We have lost a dear one. I can see that in her eyes. ![]() RIP Terri Lea... May you find peace ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:58 AM
mahina (12,980 posts)
47. Aloha oe, Onestepforward.
Peace to you, your husband and your ohana.
Sorry to see you go. A hui hou. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:00 AM
nomorenomore08 (13,324 posts)
48. I can't imagine the pain of losing her, especially this way. And it both bewilders and frightens me
that someone could take her own life so suddenly and (seemingly) without warning.
Depression is an awful, awful thing. For some it's as deadly as cancer. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:00 AM
KC (1,995 posts)
49. Thank you for letting us
know about Terri. This must be so hard for you. She will be missed here on DU!
RIP Terri |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:00 AM
Cha (270,134 posts)
50. ..
RIP
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:05 AM
Jim Lane (11,175 posts)
51. We will miss her. :(
I liked the fireflies but I see she was also the one who posted the baby meerkats last month: http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018602980
I sent that link to a couple people. Best to you as you try to cope with your loss. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:09 AM
The Traveler (5,632 posts)
52. There are no words adequate for this
I am so sorry to hear this news. I wish I had words that were helpful at times like these but I don't. I know this hurts like hell, and it is going to take awhile for that to ease. Keep your friends close. Know you will find lots of support here, too. Take care, bud.
Trav |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:39 AM
AverageJoe90 (10,745 posts)
53. My sincerest condolences to you, dear AVA. ='(
Terri will be missed by all of us. R.I.P.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:45 AM
Joe Shlabotnik (5,604 posts)
54. Oh my. I'm so sorry to hear of this tragedy.
What a loss for all. I sincerely hope that your family finds strength and peace and understanding as you work forward through this incredibly difficult time.
![]() ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:51 AM
mnhtnbb (28,033 posts)
55. I am so very sorry to hear this.
I saw the thread she posted about the fireflies and just loved it!
Such magical photos. While I didn't know Terri, I am so saddened to know that she was dealing with so much pain that she could only find one way to make it stop. It must be just utterly devastating for you. Please come here to DU to share your grief. Sending cyberhugs. ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:51 AM
AngryDem001 (684 posts)
56. I am so sorry.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 05:11 AM
shenmue (37,979 posts)
57. Rest in peace
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 05:18 AM
malaise (227,502 posts)
58. Deepest sympathy to you and yours
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 05:19 AM
napkinz (17,194 posts)
59. I'm so sorry ...
{{{{AllenVanAllen}}}}
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:06 AM
Heather MC (6,912 posts)
60. My Condolences for your loss :-(
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:10 AM
MerryBlooms (10,092 posts)
61. Oh no, I'm so sorry. Please accept my deepest condolences.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:20 AM
livetohike (20,596 posts)
62. My sympathy to you and your family and all who knew and loved Terri. May the good memories that you
have help to ease the sadness of her loss. Please stay with us on DU - our family will miss Terri's posts and are here for you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:38 AM
theHandpuppet (19,964 posts)
63. My condolences to you and to family
She will be sorely missed but lovingly remembered.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:48 AM
Scuba (53,475 posts)
64. My condolences. RIP Terri.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:49 AM
maddezmom (135,060 posts)
65. So sorry to hear this
My condolences to you. RIP Terri.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:50 AM
Live and Learn (12,769 posts)
66. Arrgh, it is so hard to lose the compassionate and yet
so hard for them to accept and live in this utterly imperfect place.
Thank you for letting us now and my sincerest condolences to you. On the rare occasion that I am fortunate to see a firefly, I will be definitely think of Terri and be reminded that good souls do exist. Surviving a spouse, is always hard and losing one to suicide is nearly unbearable. But there is very little one can do to protect these sensitive souls from the world that they cannot bear. I think DU is a refuge for many perceptive and sensitive individuals. It is extremely unfortunate that even those of like mind and those closest to an individual can't always be enough to shelter one from the sometimes unbearable realities of this life. Again, my sincerest condolences upon your (and our) great loss. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:51 AM
brer cat (14,507 posts)
67. I am so sorry for your loss.
I will never see a firefly again without thinking of Terri. I hope that you find comfort in the memories she left behind.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:53 AM
cate94 (1,706 posts)
68. I am so very sorry
for your loss.
![]() May Terri RIP |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:57 AM
Hoppy (3,595 posts)
69. So sorry.
Be sure to take care of yourself.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:58 AM
azurnoir (45,850 posts)
70. Her last gift to DU was incredibly beautiful
may you find the strength and healing to get you through this
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:02 AM
Dorian Gray (10,883 posts)
71. I am so sorry
for your loss, her husband's loss and that she took her own life. Extraordinarily sad.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:08 AM
Cooley Hurd (26,877 posts)
72. I am profoundly saddened to hear of this...
My sincere condolences.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:10 AM
Proud Liberal Dem (20,790 posts)
73. So sorry :(
n/t
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:10 AM
Skidmore (37,364 posts)
74. So very sorry that she has left you and us.
Please accept my condolences and warm thoughts.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:13 AM
B Calm (28,762 posts)
75. I wish I had the words to ease your pain.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:19 AM
PeaceNikki (27,985 posts)
76. I am so very sorry for your loss. Peace and comfort.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:20 AM
Rhiannon12866 (129,657 posts)
77. OMG, I am so profoundly sorry!
Last edited Mon May 12, 2014, 08:07 AM - Edit history (1) And I remember that post, recommended it early on, thought it was beautiful, as was she. Words fail me, thank you for letting us know and my heart goes out to you...
![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:22 AM
Surya Gayatri (15,445 posts)
78. May the Universe give you comfort and ease your pain, Gabriel. I didn't know
Terri here, but the wish is no less sincere. Be sure to take good care of yourself . You are fragile and vulnerable right now.
![]() P.S. Terri appears to be a wise soul. This life is but one step in a much greater journey and she has moved on. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:23 AM
SamKnause (12,190 posts)
79. I wish you the strength to endure this terrible loss.
I am truly sorry.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:23 AM
99Forever (14,524 posts)
80. ..
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:27 AM
whathehell (25,666 posts)
81. I am so sorry for your loss!
How good of you to think of us...Please take care of yourself, it must be so hard for you now.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:28 AM
Lefta Dissenter (6,394 posts)
82. Oh, my.
Words just can't express how sorry I am. I hope you are surrounded with loving people who can support you in this terribly difficult time.
I am so, so sorry. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:29 AM
AllyCat (12,345 posts)
83. I'm so sorry.
Thank you for letting us know. May peace come to your family in time. Godspeed Terri
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:30 AM
stonecutter357 (12,166 posts)
84. .
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:36 AM
Ferretherder (1,414 posts)
85. I hope you find the strength you need...
...to carry on without her. I will send all the positive vibes I can muster your way.
So sorry for your loss. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:39 AM
etherealtruth (22,165 posts)
86. I cannot adequately express how sorry I am
There are no words
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:46 AM
myrna minx (22,772 posts)
87. My heart aches for you and yours. She will be missed.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:52 AM
GentryDixon (2,782 posts)
88. I am deeply sorry for your loss.
May you find peace.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:56 AM
TBF (31,860 posts)
89. I'm so sorry Gabriel -
![]() Thanks for letting us know what happened and I will be keeping you in my thoughts. ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:00 AM
a kennedy (22,361 posts)
90. OMG.....I'm so sorry.....
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:02 AM
riqster (13,986 posts)
91. Condolences to you.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:03 AM
GreenPartyVoter (70,238 posts)
92. Oh no! I am so, so sorry!
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:13 AM
Bossy Monkey (15,863 posts)
93. So so very sorry. All condolences. n/t
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:13 AM
Demo_Chris (6,234 posts)
94. I am sorry for your loss. :(
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:16 AM
handmade34 (20,770 posts)
96. (((...)))
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:21 AM
spanone (125,920 posts)
97. ....
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:23 AM
xchrom (108,903 posts)
98. may Peace be with you at this very difficult time. nt
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:24 AM
Call Me Wesley (38,187 posts)
99. Safe passage to Terri.
May she be free from suffering. Peace and comfort to you and yours.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:24 AM
BumRushDaShow (79,043 posts)
100. OMG I posted on her last thread
![]() I am not a lounge lizard but her thread bubbled up on the front page showing a photographer's long-exposure pics of fireflies. I hope her pain is gone now and she has joined the little lightning bugs in the glow of the universe. ![]() |
Response to BumRushDaShow (Reply #100)
Tue May 13, 2014, 06:44 PM
GentryDixon (2,782 posts)
252. What a beautiful post.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:26 AM
MuseRider (31,110 posts)
101. I am so very sorry for your loss.
Keep breathing no matter how hard it is.
Sending wishes for peace for both you and Terri. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:28 AM
blm (106,492 posts)
102. ((Terri))
.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:34 AM
ctsnowman (1,903 posts)
103. So sorry
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:34 AM
RKP5637 (60,830 posts)
104. I'm very saddened to hear this!
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:47 AM
marions ghost (19,841 posts)
105. Thank you
for sharing her story and yours. So sorry to hear. Glad that DU meant something important to Terri. We all need connections and affinity groups can be found.
It's obvious how much you cared AVA. We feel your grief and shock. Sometimes we don't have loved ones as long as we imagine we will and there's no fault or blame. This is the condition of life as we know it. It is fragile and fleeting. Beautiful and magical, and harsh as jagged rocks. But now she flies with the fireflies in limitless freedom and joy. May you find peace and wisdom through this. Love is all, marion ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:48 AM
lovemydog (11,833 posts)
106. May Terri rest in peace
and may you, Gabriel, honor her by living with a joyous spirit. Thank you for your post.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:48 AM
yellerpup (12,163 posts)
107. Such tragedy.
My heart goes out to all who loved her.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:48 AM
BarbaRosa (2,602 posts)
108. Oh no
I so sorry.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:53 AM
JustAnotherGen (27,398 posts)
109. Oh
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:54 AM
laundry_queen (8,646 posts)
110. I'm so very sorry
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:55 AM
66 dmhlt (1,940 posts)
111. May all the fond memories you have of her be a balm in your time of sorrow ...
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:56 AM
raouldukelives (5,178 posts)
112. So very sorry.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:01 AM
Sissyk (12,665 posts)
113. I'm so very sorry for your loss, AllenvanAllen!
Please surround yourself with family and friends.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:04 AM
rurallib (56,442 posts)
114. she will be greatly missed
condolences from the rurallib family
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:07 AM
City Lights (25,171 posts)
115. I'm so very sorry for your loss.
![]() May you find peace... |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:10 AM
antiquie (4,299 posts)
116. <<<<comfort>>>>
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:21 AM
TeeYiYi (8,028 posts)
118. (((((((Gabriel Marquez)))))))...
I am so sorry.
![]() TYY |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:24 AM
greatauntoftriplets (171,946 posts)
119. My deepest condolences for your loss.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:27 AM
merrily (45,251 posts)
120. Thank you for letting us know. Also, thank you for the link to her post, which was lovely.
I am so very sorry for your loss.
I don't know what else to say. I wish I did. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:30 AM
alfredo (59,062 posts)
121. So sorry so sad
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:33 AM
matt819 (9,532 posts)
122. Condolences
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Great last post. This is the DU member formerly known as matt819.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:36 AM
AllenVanAllen (3,134 posts)
123. thank you so much everyone. i am so very touched by all of you kind words.
my heart is broken. this world has lost one the most beautiful, kind and caring souls i've ever met. she showed me how to use my wings. she told my how to reach the stars. she inspired me to be brave and open my heart to let in healing light and chase away darkness. she was my greatest teacher and my best friend. she was miraculous, she was magic. she was true depth. she made me a better man. this beautiful girl, i still feel her now. she moves inside me. she will live within me for all of my days. yes, my heart is broken and i'll never be the same but i am so grateful for every moment i had with her. i was so lucky to have shared part of her journey with her. and in my heart i feel her journey is far from over. i love you my darling wife. i will carry you in my heart forever this was her favorite song. she adored this version and to me it feels like her theme. it describes her heart. yes, it does so well. i'll let everyone know information about the visitation on saturday the 17th here in houston texas later on today. thank you guys. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Reply #123)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:02 PM
toby jo (1,269 posts)
171. Such true and gentle emotions. She was in such good hands…
... a Vincent with her starry night.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:39 AM
Puglover (16,380 posts)
124. I am so sorry Gabriel.
I wish you strength and healing.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:39 AM
Tuesday Afternoon (56,912 posts)
125. I am so sorry to see this. My condolences to you. May she rest in peace.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:41 AM
Evergreen Emerald (12,761 posts)
126. Such a loss.
I enjoyed reading her posts. I am so sorry for your loss. It is heartbreaking. My best to you.
Emmy |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:43 AM
sybylla (7,680 posts)
127. How very difficult for you and her husband.
I had a brother-in-law commit suicide. It's a completely different kind of death to mourn, with different obstacles to overcome. There's still a lot of stigma in our society for suicide. And a ridiculous amount of blaming family and friends who didn't (and couldn't possibly) find a way to stop it.
There are organizations out there to help you and onestepforward's husband and family deal with it all. My local org is called Survivors Of Suicide (SOS) because that's exactly what you need to do - find a way to survive the suicide of a loved one. If you need someone to talk to who understands and won't judge, message me and I will give you my contact info. I am so sorry for your loss. May you find comfort in knowing you were a friend to someone who truly needed one. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:44 AM
hrmjustin (71,265 posts)
128. I am so sorry for your loss.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:45 AM
gademocrat7 (8,409 posts)
129. I am very sorry for your loss.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:46 AM
panader0 (22,265 posts)
130. So sorry RIP Terri....
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:46 AM
Beaverhausen (23,784 posts)
131. I'm very sorry for your loss
Condolences to you and your family.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:49 AM
graywarrior (59,440 posts)
132. So so sorry, Gabriel
Peace and love.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:52 AM
William769 (51,446 posts)
133. So sorry to hear this.
May she rest in peace.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:53 AM
sinkingfeeling (44,033 posts)
134. You have my deepest condolences.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:56 AM
Sissyk (12,665 posts)
135. I'd like to leave you with this.
The Dragonfly Story
Once, in a little pond, in the muddy water under the lily pads, there lived a little water beetle in a community of water beetles. They lived a simple and comfortable life in the pond with few disturbances and interruptions. Once in a while, sadness would come to the community when one of their fellow beetles would climb the stem of a lily pad and would never be seen again. They knew when this happened; their friend was dead, gone forever. Then, one day, one little water beetle felt an irresistible urge to climb up that stem. However, he was determined that he would not leave forever. He would come back and tell his friends what he had found at the top. When he reached the top and climbed out of the water onto the surface of the lily pad, he was so tired, and the sun felt so warm, that he decided he must take a nap. As he slept, his body changed and when he woke up, he had turned into a beautiful blue-tailed dragonfly with broad wings and a slender body designed for flying. So, fly he did! And, as he soared he saw the beauty of a whole new world and a far superior way of life to what he had never known existed. Then he remembered his beetle friends and how they were thinking by now he was dead. He wanted to go back to tell them, and explain to them that he was now more alive than he had ever been before. His life had been fulfilled rather than ended. But, his new body would not go down into the water. He could not get back to tell his friends the good news. Then he understood that their time would come, when they, too, would know what he now knew. So, he raised his wings and flew off into his joyous new life! ~Author Unknown~ from MountainWings.com It helped my young nephews through the hard time of the loss of their mother. Then, me through the loss of my younger brother even though it was meant, I think, for kids. Since Terri liked fireflies I figure she would like dragonflies. And you will start noticing them all around you; their beauty, grace, and poise. Peace to you, AllenVanAllen! |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:57 AM
WillyT (72,631 posts)
136. (((((((onestepforward)))))))
![]() ![]() Peace... |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 09:58 AM
TorchTheWitch (11,065 posts)
137. OMG how tragic!
I'm so very sorry! I never seem to know the right thing to say in times like these, but both you and her are in my thoughts and prayers.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:04 AM
riverwalker (8,685 posts)
138. so sorry
Gabriel, we are all here for you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:13 AM
scarletwoman (31,893 posts)
139. I can't imagine the pain of losing a loved one this way.
May you find peace and strength.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:15 AM
mopinko (59,299 posts)
140. it's not your fault. it doesn't mean she didn't love you.
i think a lot of women depressives love so hard it is like an undertow.
and tho this was perhaps a preventable tragedy, that doesnt mean that the tools were in the right hands at the right time with just the right thing to say. nobody knows what that would have been for her. ![]() xoxoxoxoxooxo |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:15 AM
LoisB (1,553 posts)
141. I am so sorry.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:16 AM
valerief (53,235 posts)
142. RIP, Terri. nt
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:20 AM
cyberswede (26,117 posts)
143. Very sorry to hear this.
Condolences to you and your family.
![]() Her last post was beautiful. ![]() ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:24 AM
2naSalit (49,052 posts)
144. ...
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:30 AM
greatlaurel (2,002 posts)
145. Please accept my condolences.
Thank you for letting us know. Be extra gentle with yourself and take care during this difficult time.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:35 AM
Sheepshank (12,504 posts)
146. sometimes wanting peace is everything
I am so sorry for such devastating news. Gentle hugs to you and the rest of the family dealing with such tragedy.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:36 AM
nolabear (38,241 posts)
147. I am so, so sorry. I hope you find peace.
She was lovely, as were the bits of herself shared here. I hope you'll know your sorrow is echoed by those of us who knew her even a little.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:37 AM
Greybnk48 (9,107 posts)
148. ...
Please accept my sincere sympathy. She will be missed.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:38 AM
magical thyme (14,881 posts)
149. I am so very, very sorry for your loss...
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:39 AM
Tom_Foolery (4,661 posts)
150. So sorry for your loss...
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:40 AM
LiberalLoner (8,112 posts)
151. I am so sorry for your loss.
Not many posts on DU make me cry. This one did.
I am so sorry. May the angels comfort you during this time of grieving. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:41 AM
armed_and_liberal (246 posts)
152. My condolences
Very sad to hear of your loss, I lost a loved one to suicide some years ago and it still hurts.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:42 AM
Coventina (22,256 posts)
153. Hugs to you Gabriel, at this difficult time.
{{{Gabriel}}}
Please let us know how you are doing. I remember, from my own losses, how long the process of grieving can be. This community will be here for you, every step of the way. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:42 AM
bigtree (79,079 posts)
154. very sad
. . .
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:42 AM
MoonRiver (35,152 posts)
155. I am so, so sorry for your loss.
R.I.P. Terri
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:44 AM
kairos12 (9,988 posts)
156. No words could express how sorry I am to hear this. My condolences to her entire family.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:46 AM
Amaril (1,267 posts)
157. So very, very sorry for your loss.
Know that we're all here for you, Gabriel.
![]() Rest peacefully, Terri. ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:48 AM
CrispyQ (29,533 posts)
158. My sympathies to you & your loved ones.
Rest in Peace, onestepforward. You will be missed.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:49 AM
octoberlib (13,682 posts)
159. My deepest sympathies to you and your family.
![]() "What we have once enjoyed, we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes part of us." -Helen Keller |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:12 AM
broadcaster75201 (387 posts)
160. Horribly sad. I am so sorry. n/t
nt
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:26 AM
MissB (14,363 posts)
162. I am so very sorry
I loved that last post of hers.
I'm terribly sorry for your loss. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:33 AM
Gothmog (93,612 posts)
163. May she rest in peace
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:34 AM
Eleanors38 (18,318 posts)
164. My deep condolences. This is so sad.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:35 AM
progressoid (46,025 posts)
165. There are no words.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:43 AM
cp (3,322 posts)
166. We share your sorrow
Dear Gabriel,
Three of our friends have lost loved ones to suicide. It's a terrible loss. When you are ready, this is an excellent book: Suicide survivors : a guide for those left behind, by Adina Wrobleski, Minneapolis, Minn. : Suicide Awareness Voices of Education, 2002. (at most public libraries or http://www.save.org) Please be kind to yourself and let others give you kindness. We care about you. cp family |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:50 AM
niyad (76,773 posts)
167. so very sorry for your loss, gabriel. may you find peace and comfort. and know that
DU is a family, and your family is here for you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:56 AM
elleng (105,530 posts)
168. Oh my goodness.
Thank you for posting, and our thoughts are with you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:00 PM
ScreamingMeemie (68,918 posts)
169. Gabriel, I am so sorry.
I will keep you in my thoughts.
It is hard. So very, very hard. Know that you are not alone. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:01 PM
mokawanis (3,969 posts)
170. So sorry to hear this
My condolences to you and to other family and friends.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:24 PM
PumpkinAle (1,210 posts)
172. Condolences Gabriel
and may Terri RIP.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:24 PM
glinda (14,807 posts)
173. Am sorry for your loss, Gabriel. She
looked and seemed to be an amazing human. So sorry she was sad and could not stay with you or us. This is deeply and sincerely heartbreaking news. What a gentle, lovely and thoughtful soul she seemed to be.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:25 PM
Iggo (44,163 posts)
174. Terri!!!!!
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:26 PM
steve2470 (36,918 posts)
175. my sincerest condolences to you and your family nt
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:39 PM
Feral Child (2,086 posts)
176. Very sad.
Sincere condolences, Gabriel.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:41 PM
locks (1,932 posts)
177. I loved the great pictures of fireflies
as I don't get to see them in the west. She will be sorely missed, I'm sure. Thank you for the post and we will all be thinking of you.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:45 PM
Tikki (13,776 posts)
178. We are so very sorry for your loss..
The Tikkis |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:51 PM
CherokeeDem (3,685 posts)
179. I am so very sorry...
May you and your family find peace in her memory....
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 12:54 PM
nclib (974 posts)
180. I'm so very sorry for your loss.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:03 PM
virgdem (1,786 posts)
181. I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved wife...
May she rest in eternal peace!
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:05 PM
Lifelong Protester (8,409 posts)
182. My sympathies to you
I am so sorry for your loss-words seem pretty inadequate.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:08 PM
Marrah_G (28,581 posts)
183. I am so sorry
She was beautiful and talented.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:10 PM
joeybee12 (56,177 posts)
184. So very sorry to hear this...I hope she's at peace
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:18 PM
Blue_In_AK (46,436 posts)
185. My sincere condolences.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:19 PM
joanbarnes (1,643 posts)
186. Speechless......deepest sympathy to you and all who love her.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:23 PM
SoCalDem (103,856 posts)
187. She was a beautiful person ..inside and out..she will be missed
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:29 PM
LiberalEsto (22,845 posts)
188. My deepest condolences to you and your family
and remember, we are here for YOU if you need to vent, or need good vibes, or cyberhugs, or just to hang around.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:34 PM
uppityperson (114,844 posts)
189. Oh no. I am so sorry, loved that firefly post and am just so sorry.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:38 PM
ChisolmTrailDem (9,463 posts)
190. Oh my, Gabriel... I am so, so sorry for your loss...
We lost my stepson to suicide last September. Even so, I can't imagine what you must be feeling. All my best to you and your family. Hang in there, Gabriel, and please let us know if you need anything or just want to talk.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 01:45 PM
herding cats (17,162 posts)
191. I'm deeply sorry for your loss
My thoughts are with you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:16 PM
Worried senior (1,328 posts)
192. I am very sorry for your loss
She was a beautiful person.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:23 PM
angel823 (409 posts)
193. no words
Nothing we can say will help much, probably, but know we are here.
Gabriel, if your profile is up to date, I am close by. If you or your family need anything, please pm me. Angel in Texas |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 02:27 PM
Fumesucker (45,851 posts)
194. Such a beautiful last post
Fitting I think.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:20 PM
Damansarajaya (625 posts)
195. Deepest sympathies.
In these photos, she looks thoughtful and kind.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:24 PM
Liberal_in_LA (44,397 posts)
196. omg. so sad.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:33 PM
louslobbs (2,686 posts)
197. So sorry to hear this. Take care of yourself during this difficult time and remember to breathe.
This is just so sad.
Lou |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:33 PM
MannyGoldstein (34,589 posts)
198. So sad.
Peace to you.
- Manny |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:34 PM
TygrBright (18,640 posts)
199. Oh, Gabriel... so VERY sorry...
Some things you need to know, if you don't know already:
It was her decision. Whatever the specific brain disorder that made life so unbearable for her, it wasn't your "fault" or ANYONE's. It's a complex disease, and sometimes, like now, that fucker wins. There are people who want to help you: Let them. Even though the pain is still raw and fresh and awful and you may want distance and only the most familiar loved ones, it's BECAUSE that pain is so awful that you and Terri's other dear ones need some help from professionals experienced with this situation. Please seek it out, and accept it. Be with friends, be with loved ones all you can. Grieve. Do not let the shame and doubt and anger and all the other baggage that goes with suicide derail the process. No matter HOW she died, Terri has died, and you have the loss to deal with. You have friends here. Terri's friends, your friends. Yeah, it's only an "online community," but you know what? The cool thing about online communities is that we're here, 24/7. A few keystrokes away. We're here during the sleepless nights, the empty times. Use us. Finally-- this is a bit of wisdom passed on from a family member after her brother (a cousin of mine) killed himself: "It hurt too much for him to be himself here. It hurt too much for my love to reach him, maybe. Now that he's not here, I still have that love, it's all still here, and it's here because of him. He'd want me to do something positive with that love, since he couldn't. It's the best thing I can do for him." Live. Grieve. Love. respectfully, Bright |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:36 PM
aikoaiko (31,416 posts)
200. My condolences to you and everyone else who knew and loved her.
[IMG] ![]() This is the DU member formerly known as aikoaiko.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:40 PM
get the red out (13,425 posts)
201. I am so sorry
I wish for healing for her friends and family.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 03:57 PM
freshwest (53,661 posts)
202. So sorry to hear this. No words I can say will be enough. Sorry is all I have.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:05 PM
Squinch (35,919 posts)
203. I am so sorry.
You and she are in my thoughts. I wish you peace.
This is the DU member formerly known as Squinch.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:14 PM
nashville_brook (20,958 posts)
204. i am so incredibly sorry for your loss
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:14 PM
TxDemChem (1,915 posts)
205. My condolences to you and your family
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:48 PM
AllenVanAllen (3,134 posts)
206. my god, once again thank all of you so much.
the outpouring of love and support has touched me so deeply and made it possible for me to start to make it through this terrible loss. i can't thank all of you enough. i wanted to let everyone know we're going to have a visitation for Terri on Saturday the 17th from 2:00 pm to 5:00 pm at Santana Funeral Directors located at 401 Ssgt. Macario Garcia Drive, Houston TX 77011 ph. (713) 921-3000 ![]() everyone is welcome. thank you so much. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 04:52 PM
Rider3 (918 posts)
207. My deepest condolences
She was a beautiful person.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 05:20 PM
WheelWalker (7,854 posts)
208. and the wheel turns
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 05:29 PM
struggle4progress (111,867 posts)
209. .
![]() hoping your memories of better times will comfort you |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 05:32 PM
KBlagburn (560 posts)
210. My thoughts and prayers for you and the family
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 05:42 PM
rhett o rick (55,981 posts)
211. My condolences. nm
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 05:44 PM
Starry Messenger (32,330 posts)
212. (((hugs)))
I'm very sorry for your loss. Peace to you and your family.
|
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 05:44 PM
silvershadow (10,336 posts)
213. I am so truly sorry for your loss. As a suicide survivor myself, I urge you to reach out
for support wherever you can. There are survivors groups all over the country, hopefully you can find one close. My thoughts are with you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 05:47 PM
Ohio Joe (15,684 posts)
214. my condolences
RIP
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:02 PM
angstlessk (11,862 posts)
215. I have no words...except she was a beautiful woman
k&R
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:05 PM
democrank (10,364 posts)
216. I`m so very sorry.
RIP~
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:19 PM
JesterCS (1,796 posts)
217. *hug* So Sorry for your loss n/t
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:25 PM
countryjake (8,554 posts)
218. All of my sympathies to you, Gabriel
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:35 PM
Ilsa (57,836 posts)
219. She was so lovely. My condolences to your family. nt
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 06:45 PM
pacalo (24,721 posts)
220. I'm so, so sorry...
This is heartbreaking.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:07 PM
Boomerproud (4,457 posts)
221. Words cannot convey our sense of mourning for Terri
Gabriel, your two posts have already had a healing effect and you are a remarkable man for even posting in your time of loss. Please let all of DU help you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:15 PM
alsame (7,784 posts)
222. Deepest condolences to
you and all who loved her
![]() RIP Terri, you will be missed here ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:19 PM
Lisa0825 (14,307 posts)
223. I didn't personally know her or you, but I am so very sorry....
So sorry she was hurting, whatever the reason, and so sorry for the pain you are enduring now. I wish I could give you a hug for real.
((((((((((HUGS)))))))))) I wish there were something I could say that could help, but I know it's impossible. I hope that knowing so many people care is at least some small comfort to you. ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:30 PM
AAO (3,300 posts)
224. I'm so sorry, Gabriel. Thank you, for letting us know.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:31 PM
msanthrope (37,549 posts)
225. I am so sorry for your loss. I wish you peace and calm. nt
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:33 PM
randys1 (16,286 posts)
226. Never see fireflies again without thinking of her, and I dont know her, new here...so sorry
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:39 PM
snacker (3,587 posts)
227. Hugs to you...
I'm so sorry. Peace.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Name removed Message auto-removed
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 07:47 PM
Curmudgeoness (18,219 posts)
229. How tragic! I am so sorry for your loss.
I really enjoyed her last post.....may fireflies light her way.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:08 PM
calimary (62,096 posts)
230. OMG! I just saw this. DAMN.
I can't tell you how sorry I am to hear this. I'm so sorry! Thank you for posting this so we know. After awhile when one doesn't see a post from them, one does start wondering. I'm so sorry. Be at peace, at last, Terri Lea. And Gabriel - you have all our prayers and sympathies. You do not mourn alone.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:18 PM
xfundy (5,105 posts)
231. The pain that exists in the mind dwarfs physical pain.
I've been there. I'm so sorry she couldn't go on and be there for you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:23 PM
Jefferson23 (30,099 posts)
232. Your beautiful wife, I am so sorry. n/t
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:46 PM
appal_jack (3,813 posts)
233. Condolences to you, Gabriel.
Condolences to you, Gabriel. I am so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful last post onestepforward gave us all.
As Mary Mother Jones said long ago, "Pray for the dead and fight like hell for the living." -app |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:47 PM
NRaleighLiberal (54,391 posts)
234. .
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:48 PM
Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin (64,156 posts)
235. How sad
My condolences to her family.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:49 PM
Terra Alta (5,158 posts)
236. sorry for your loss.
She was beautiful. May she rest in peace.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:51 PM
go west young man (4,856 posts)
237. My sincere condolences....
her photography is amazing. A little dedication to an artful spirit who has flown to the sky. Peace to you.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 08:52 PM
ClusterFreak (3,091 posts)
238. I am so terribly sorry for your loss.
Your tribute to your late wife is very moving and inspirational.
I hope you find peace in the days, months and years ahead. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:09 PM
FourScore (9,704 posts)
239. This is just too sad. I am so sorry for your loss Gabriel...
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:48 PM
renate (13,302 posts)
240. That is so sad, and I am so very sorry
What a terrible loss, and I am so sorry for your pain as well as for hers.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 10:58 PM
cordelia (2,174 posts)
241. I am so very, very sorry.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:01 PM
Autumn (40,277 posts)
242. I'm so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful soul she was.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:02 PM
BlancheSplanchnik (20,061 posts)
243. I wish we could heal your pain....
Please seek out support and compassion. You need that now and for the long haul. I am so so sorry.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:05 PM
senseandsensibility (13,446 posts)
244. I am glad that you reached out to DU
There are many words of wisdom and comfort on this thread, most much more eloquent than anything I can add. I know that you are experiencing enormous, unimaginable pain. Please don't blame yourself. It's good that you are sharing your pain, and I hope that you find peace.
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:08 PM
Kaleva (27,335 posts)
245. From now on, whenever I see fireflies, I'll think of onestepforward.
So very sorry for your loss.
![]() RIP Terri. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Mon May 12, 2014, 11:14 PM
LeftyMom (49,212 posts)
246. I'm so sorry for your loss. She was lovely.
If she had a cause she supported where you'd like donations sent in her honor, can you please let us know?
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Tue May 13, 2014, 12:21 AM
Triana (22,666 posts)
247. OMG. I am so sorry AVA.
She was beautiful. That long-exposure firefly post was one of my favorites! I shared it outside of DU because it was beautiful and fascinating.
My heart goes out to you. ![]() |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Tue May 13, 2014, 12:30 AM
noiretextatique (27,238 posts)
248. my deepest sympathies
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Tue May 13, 2014, 12:10 PM
ladyVet (1,587 posts)
249. I'm so sorry. My thoughts with you and your family.
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Tue May 13, 2014, 06:00 PM
AllenVanAllen (3,134 posts)
250. all of you are wonderful
this is why terri loved her DU family so much. i am more moved and touched than my words can convey. thank you. thank you so much. ![]() "You thinking of me a year before we met" i have this pic on my work table in my studio and it always ticked the shit out of me. |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Tue May 13, 2014, 06:09 PM
warrprayer (4,734 posts)
251. Farewell onestepforward
and thanks for making this such a great place
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Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Tue May 13, 2014, 09:27 PM
yaddle (2 posts)
253. She was magic, she will be missed <3
<3
“I learned about the sacred art of self decoration with the monarch butterflies perched atop my head, lightning bugs as my night jewelry, and emerald-green frogs as bracelets.” ― Clarissa Pinkola Estés |
Response to AllenVanAllen (Original post)
Tue May 13, 2014, 10:11 PM
3catwoman3 (16,707 posts)
254. You speak so eloquently of the many ways your wife...
...touched your life, and what a special person you found her to be. To be able to do this at such a stressful time tells me that you must be an equally remarkable person. I hope you find the strength you need, both within yourself, and from those around you.
You may find people speaking of closure, and making suggestions about how to achieve it. Many of us who have adjusted to life after the loss of a beloved person feel that closure is an elusive and probably non-existent state. We do not "get over" such losses. Rather, you learn to adjust to a new existence. There will still be reasons to cherish your own life and to take joy in things, but perspective will be forever altered. People will want to help, and will want to know how they can. Tell them not to be afraid to share their memories. People often hesitate to do this for fear of making you sad. Knowing the affection with which your wife is remembered by others who loved her can be helpful. |