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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region Forumsnot a good day.
so i am driving down the highway, and the car which was ahead of me swerved to the left to miss something in the road. i slow down and see something in the road ( thinking it was a deer or some kind of debris ) i, too, swerve to miss..............a young lady lying in the middle of the highway....so i hit the brakes and slide to a stop and get out to render assistance. my wife calls 911 as i run up to this young lady...others have stopped now and i look in horror to what happened to this women....i help divert traffic to one lane as the other motorists cover her with a blanket.....eventually police and paramedics arrive and take over.....i talk to the state trooper and tell him what i saw and he says i can go......later on i learn she died at the scene....so now i feel sad that i could not help her...angry that people just drove by and stared.....shocked because i never expected to see a person in the middle of the highway hit by a vehicle...but mostly sad...for her and her family....
sorry...just had to get this out.
Brickbat
(19,339 posts)You might find yourself coming back to this in the coming days and week. Talk it out, make a donation in her memory, take care of yourself.
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
Marrah_G
(28,581 posts)~hug~
unionthug777
(740 posts)thanks for the hug.
defacto7
(13,485 posts)but there are also people who have fear. There are people who know they could not take on the role you did. Thanks for being a person who was strong enough and caring enough to take on such a rough situation. You will be fine.
awoke_in_2003
(34,582 posts)and eject the driver. Luckily someone was there who tended to him, but I had enough wits to flag the cars to move on past so the ambulance to reach the scene.
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
freshwest
(53,661 posts)unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
hrmjustin
(71,265 posts)unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
cynatnite
(31,011 posts)I do think people are afraid to get involved at times. Sometimes, people believe there is nothing they can do.
It's an eerie coincidence you posted this. On my way home from work tonight, a woman was standing over an injured dog in the middle of the street. I stopped to see what I could do. She had already called the humane society, but both of us know the animal's outlook was grim given how still he ways laying.
People drove by. A lady and her daughter stopped, too. That was it.
I've worked in healthcare for a long time and people usually do not react how we believe they should in situations like these. I don't blame them.
unionthug777
(740 posts)not knowing what i was about to see. thank you.
rhett o rick
(55,981 posts)unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
TreasonousBastard
(43,049 posts)with cops all over asking who saw what.
Turns out it was this poor guy crossing the street who was hit. Then while he was trying to get out of the street, another car hit him and dragged him while the one person who stopped was waving his arms trying to direct traffic around him.
Hearing the story was bad enough, but then I saw the blood and the single shoe in the street and almost lost it.
First responders, cops, fire, EMS... complain if you must, but they gotta have a lot of stomach to deal with this on a regular basis and not go insane.
loli phabay
(5,580 posts)Nothing is as bad as when you come on an accident scene and you see a teddy bear or doll lying on the roadway.
unionthug777
(740 posts)we cannot thank them enough. thank you.
KT2000
(20,605 posts)and try to help her. A truly upsetting experience but you did what you could.
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
liberal_at_heart
(12,081 posts)unionthug777
(740 posts)my thoughts are with her family also.
Spitfire of ATJ
(32,723 posts)unionthug777
(740 posts)reality sucks at the moment. especially for that young womans family.
Spitfire of ATJ
(32,723 posts)Whisp
(24,096 posts)thanks for the hug.
tomm2thumbs
(13,297 posts)something like that can affect you for a long time -- good that you share it with others as it definitely can upend your emotions...
you did what you could -- just remember that
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
nadinbrzezinski
(154,021 posts)This was night. I stopped when I realized what I drove by, and drove back. I used my car to shield my patient and radio'd dispatch. Then took my crap out of the trunk and actually started advanced life support on this gent. The trauma unit was 10 minutes from the scene, so a full ALS crew was on scene this fast.
This patient was taken as a code trauma to the Trauma bay, with major head injuries. Only reason he did not die at the scene was how close we were, from that bridge and that I started ALS. He still died in the ER an hour later.
Next shift I learned he was the father of one of my kids. She hugged me tight after the funeral and all that. She said that at least he had a chance. Later talking with traffic, he was hit at over 70, highway speed.
I still see him, in my dreams and wonder if it could have been different.
You did what you could. I literally had ambulance level gear in my trunk, and literally started advanced care protocols with a cop assisting. I mean the kind of care I could not render today. You did good, most people never stop.
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
Egalitarian Thug
(12,448 posts)believe. I had a similar experience over 30 years ago and I only think about it every few months now.
Be good to yourself and take whatever time you need.
unionthug777
(740 posts)it'll be a long time before i forget. i feel more for her family.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,854 posts)unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
SouthernDonkey
(256 posts)About 4 years ago around midnight one night my wife and I were driving down a less traveled country road that dead ended at a lake. In a 90 degree turn in the road, I slammed on the brakes and stopped just shy of a young man lying in the road. Our cell phones just happened to be zero charged and I got out and checked his pulse and sent my wife back up the road to find a house with a porch light on to call for help. This young man was dead, but I found another who had been ejected from a wrecked pick up who was still alive and hurting. There were no street lights there, only the headlights of the truck illuminating out into a field. I comforted him and we sat in the dark, waiting for my wife to return and help to come. I took off my shirt and ran back up the road to divert anyone from running over the first young man. It was a horrible night, and we had many disturbing hours without sleep after returning home.
You did the right thing! Some people honestly do not know how to react in situations like this. I was an air traffic controller, as well as a former surgical nurse with ER training as well so I tend to take charge when I see no one else assuming that role. You would think at the least ANY reasonable person would stop to divert traffic and prevent further harm to her, but unfortunately not everyone is wired that way.
Trying to understand the "why's" and "how's" of other peoples actions will only make you crazy and bring you no answers I'm sorry to say. Know that you did the decent, and right thing! Thank God or whomever or whatever that you were there as you were, she was at least blessed to have your concern!
unionthug777
(740 posts)not much sleep last night. police still don't know why she was on the road.
ReRe
(10,597 posts)... one thing this society could use more of, for sure. Civic Duty, folks. Just DO IT!
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
JustinBulletin
(75 posts)As that poor girl lay dying you let her know that someone cared about her and that she was not alone. Even if you were a stranger, it still was important. I wish you peace of mind. You did your best.
FSogol
(45,595 posts)unionthug777
(740 posts)for your kind words.
Rowdyboy
(22,057 posts)didn't do. Yes, you should be sad but you did what was right. There's not much more that can be expected today.
unionthug777
(740 posts)i wish there was more i could have done.
niyad
(113,966 posts)and that is worth everything. I know this is terribly hard right now, but talk to someone if you need to, and realize that this was a trauma for you and your wife, as well. just remember, you got involved, and that was a very unselfish and caring, compassionate thing to do. your DU family is here for you.
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
AllyCat
(16,267 posts)so sorry you are hurting and her family has lost her. Thank you and hugs for stopping to help!
unionthug777
(740 posts)my thoughts are with her family.
Liberty Belle
(9,540 posts)Deeply disturbing. Also was present more recently when a man committed suicide, jumping off a building and landing near me. I was haunted by both incidents for some time.
I am glad that you stopped, so at least that young woman wasn't hit over and over again by vehicles. You did what you could.
unionthug777
(740 posts)it will haunt me. but i feel worse for her family.
Warpy
(111,467 posts)Stopping to render aid gave everybody else permission to stop and help. Her last memory must have been of kind people wrapping her up and trying to get her to the hospital.
You did good today. Stop beating yourself up.
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
joesdaughter
(243 posts)unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
Lil Missy
(17,865 posts)I can understand why it's hard to get it out of your head.
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
life long demo
(1,113 posts)You made the choice to stop to help. No one can ask anymore of another person.
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
Puzzledtraveller
(5,937 posts)similar situation.
unionthug777
(740 posts)that it does. i keep thinking to myself" why were you on the highway??!!!!!" what were you doing????
pinboy3niner
(53,339 posts)Human tragedy affects others--even complete strangers.
unionthug777
(740 posts)yes it does. i feel worse for her family.
pinboy3niner
(53,339 posts)I witnessed a head-on crash on the interstate, with people hurled through the windshield.
I was the first to arrive at the side of a grandmother who'd been thrown. Her injuries were devastating, and there was nothing I could do for her besides coverng her with a blanket.
That was shortly before I went to war and saw a lot worse. But somehow that memory stuck with me--even when I buried the other memories...
Yo_Mama
(8,303 posts)I don't have any helpful advice, only sympathy and the hope that others on the board have more to offer.
unionthug777
(740 posts)plenty of caring people here, i see. thanks to everyone who replied.
cate94
(2,817 posts)You made difference, even though she didn't make it. I am sure her family is grateful that someone stopped and tried to help and protect her until the police came.
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you for your kind words.
Buns_of_Fire
(17,217 posts)unionthug777
(740 posts)most kind of you.
uponit7771
(90,371 posts)unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)In her final moments you gave her help and made sure she did not pass unnoticed and unaided.
Be gentle with yourself.
unionthug777
(740 posts)i tried.
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)That was very compassionate.
People always say how cold people are in big cities, but the one thing that I have observed (and have been a part of), is how many of us always stopped to help, call the paramedics, tried to help in whatever way we could. Even though the cities I have lived in were large, our neighborhoods were true communities and we cared about each other. It's so sad to see how many people just don't want to get involved anymore.
unionthug777
(740 posts)thank you.