Obese Russian general, 67, called up to fight in Ukraine as Putin 'scrapes the barrel'

[packman]

General Pavel, a veteran of Russia's disastrous war in Afghanistan, is being dragged out of retirement to join the battle in Ukraine. He is said to eat five meals a day washed down with a bottle of vodka


https://www.dailystar.co.uk/news/world-news/obese-russian-general-67-called-27326346

Damn, do the Ukrainians have a missile capable of bring Pavzilla down?

[Best_man23]

1. That's No Moon

Its a Russian General.

DU Mods, if this violates the site terms, let me know and I'll self delete.

[TheBlackAdder]

29. That's the set of Wes Craven's remake called, "Willy Chonk and the Lada Factory"

.

He plays Vladimir, who chews gum and becomes the ever-growing Gooseberry.

.

[PortTack]

2. Ha!! more cannon fodder. British Intel says conscripts are getting 2-3 days training b4 being sent

To the front.

[Ocelot II]

3. It would appear that he enjoyed his retirement, while it lasted.

[cloudbase]

4. He'll be an unmistakable target. n/t

[Vogon_Glory]

18. From the air and on the ground. n/t

[CanonRay]

5. Thankfully he won't be on a horse.

[KentuckyWoman]

6. I mean this with all sincerity

HOW does a person walk once they get to that point? How do they ANYTHING. Surely someone has to help him with shoes?

I'm not fat shaming, not in the least. I'm just trying to figure out how someone that limited by size can serve militarily? Military service requires physical skill of some sort.

[LiberalFighter]

8. Most likely has slip on footwear.

[packman]

12. Hey- What's wrong with slip-ons

[Hekate]

17. It is a disability, for sure. Velcro fastenings would allow independence in dressing oneself...

Though a general could very well have a valet or military equivalent, you know? I don’t know what we all did before velcro.

[Best_man23]

46. Most general officers have attaches who work for them

But I could imagine what goes through some Russian Colonel's mind when he's lacing up this General's boots (if they even find boots to fit him).

[Effete Snob]

7. Good move

He can occupy about a third of Ukraine on his own.

[msongs]

14. now that is funny. nt

[badhair77]

9. He must have custom tailored fatigues.

Think about the endurance factor. Carrying that much weight wears one out. My goodness, he strikes a powerful figure, doesn’t he.

[Disaffected]

10. Needs a bigger hat. nt

[yonder]

11. Pavel's dog hasn't been getting many table scraps

Looks like.

[Efilroft Sul]

13. Holy shit, they've enlisted Bombur.

[Botany]

15. D. I. D.

Dead in days. Heart attack, bullet, stroke, kidney or liver failure, drone attack, or ....

[Jirel]

16. A new strategy?

Is Putin now trying to create a kaiju battalion?

[bluedigger]

19. How do they transport him?

Do they load him in the back of a truck? He's not fitting inside any standard military vehicle.

[Best_man23]

45. Not sure about ground, but I heard this was his plane

The IL-76, which is the Russian equivalent of a US C-5 or C-17.

[Talitha]

20. Whew! That's a grease fire waiting to happen.

[Thomas Hurt]

21. I don't think they need a missile to hit him, just need to scare him enough to make him run.

[Boomerproud]

22. This posts keep coming, and so does the misery and slaughter

nt

[Swede]

23. If someone yells "haul ass" at him in a firefight,

he'd have to make 2 trips.

[ornotna]

24. That should be an easy kill

Just one wafer thin mint.

[BootinUp]

26. lol nt

[Jedi Guy]

27. +1 for the Python reference. N/T

[BootinUp]

25. cannon fodder?

[Journeyman]

28. Gotta admire the confidence to wear camouflage, as though he'd blend in anywhere . . .

[Kaleva]

31. He won't blend into the woods. He is the woods

[Kaleva]

30. The hat looks small on him.

[eShirl]

32. "I'll call the Brute Squad." "I'm on the Brute Squad." "You are the Brute Squad."

[Raine]

33. Geesh I don't think he'd ever fit into a tank! 😮 nt

[Brother Buzz]

37. I have a high degree of certainty they could shoehorn him in

Getting him out is another story.

[Raine]

41. LOL! 😃 👍 nt

[peggysue2]

34. This is cruel and unusual punishment

A man of 67, clearly out of shape, called to the front of a vicious war. Good indication of Putin's desperation.

[Hav]

35. Agreed, how is it anything else but a desperation move

All of Russia doesn't have a younger alternative in better shape with sufficient experience to get promoted (until a rocket lands on his head)?

[Hav]

36. I had to check whether it's The Onion

If it's true that he drinks a bottle of vodka a day, Ukraine should consider not killing him but keep him in a position of power as long as possible. He'll either make decisions while drunk or while he's in withdrawal (unlikely). What could go wrong?

[Emile]

38. Looks like an easy target.

How many Russian generals have they killed now?

[JI7]

39. The source sounds tabloid . Any others confirming this ?

[Brother Buzz]

40. All the UK tabloids are running with it

I understand they all have the Ukrainian minister of propaganda on speed dial, too.

[sl8]

42. And here's what MediaBiasFactCheck says about that tabloid:

"Overall, we rate the Daily Star UK Questionable based on frequent use of sensational headlines, routine publication of conspiracy theories and pseudoscience, as well as a long track record with failed fact checks and fake news."


https://mediabiasfactcheck.com/daily-star-uk/

[Emile]

43. On morning Joe they are reporting Russia will soon exhaust

it's combat capabilities. This time the Daily Star may be right? ?

[sl8]

44. Oh, absolutely.

It might be true.

There's a reason why more reputable sources don't run stories like this unless they have a credible source and/or some confirmation.

[Deep State Witch]

47. "We're Gonna Need a Bigger General"

Okay, as a fat person myself, I dislike fat-shaming. But, in this case, I will make an exception.

[lpbk2713]

48. A calculated strategic move on Putin's part.

He should take the place of two, maybe three, dismissed generals.