Louie Gohmert Remains the Undisputed Emperor of the Crazy People

[mcar]

Louie Gohmert Remains the Undisputed Emperor of the Crazy People
216,726 humans—or 72 percent of the humans who voted in Texas's First Congressional District—voted to re-elect this man last time around.

By Charles P. Pierce
Jun 9, 2021

ong ago, at least in Blog Time, when Michele Bachmann vacated Congress, we searched here in the shebeen for a new Padishah Emperor of The Crazy People. After a thorough accounting of various portfolios of The Stupid, we settled the crown atop the shining dome of Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas). We never have felt for one second that we chose poorly, not even when Matt Gaetz, Lauren Boebert, and Marjorie Taylor Greene descended on the House of Representatives and obviously began styling themselves as possible contenders over the past couple of years. We knew that Emperor Louie had deep reserves of lunacy that were still untapped. We have not been disappointed.

In a hearing on ways to cope with the climate crisis, Gohmert got a chance to ask questions of Jennifer Eberlien, the associate deputy chief of the National Forest Service. (The hearing also involved officials from the Bureau of Land Management.) He was curious about what strategies might be employed by the NFS and the BLM to mitigate the effects of the crisis, and he wasn’t talking about half-measures, either. Emperor Louie was thinking big.

Is there anything that the National Forest Service, or BLM can do to change the course of the moon's orbit or the Earth's orbit around the sun? Obviously they would have profound effects on our climate.

Eberlein took an obvious two-beat, probably to allow the thought balloon above her head, reading, "Thank god I’m doing this remotely" to dissipate, before telling Gohmert:

I would have to follow up with you on that.

To which Gohmert suggested that, if Eberlein could figure out how to turn Smokey the Bear into Captain Marvel, she should get back to him about how to do it. The Management would like to remind you that, the last time that Louie Gohmert won re-election from the First Congressional District in Texas, he did so because 216,726 humans—or, 72 percent of the humans who voted—voted for him. To borrow an epigram we usually use elsewhere: This is your democracy, America. Cherish it.

https://www.esquire.com/news-politics/politics/a36676755/louie-gohmert-moon-orbit-climate-change/

[LuckyLib]

1. I can't believe folks act with respect in the face of such absurdity.

Her response should have been: “Are you serious?”

[mcar]

2. He would have accused her of casting asparagus on his character

[dutch777]

3. It is amazing our civil servants remain civil. Raises the question if warmer climates spawn

dumber voters. Gohmert-- TX, Greene-- GA, Gaetz -- FL....hmmm?

[malaise]

4. By a distance

What's worse is that he's proud of his ignorance

[mcar]

5. And the dude was a judge!

[smb]

7. Can You Imagine Being On Trial In His Court...

...knowing that your future was hanging on the judgment of an abject imbecile?

[tanyev]

6. Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck weren't available?

[CanonRay]

8. Sultan of Stupid

Duke of Dumb

[Initech]

9. No! That's not how that works! That's not how any of this works!

[mnhtnbb]

10. When I was in elementary school, I apparently asked at the dinner table one night

"who launched the moon?" It was during the Sputnik era and the dinner table discussion was about satellites and orbits. I knew the Moon was in orbit around the Earth, so I wanted to know who launched it?

I guess Gohmert never had a father who was an amateur astronomer to teach him the difference between satellite and moon orbits.

[mcar]

13. That's a great story

I guess Gohmert's intellect never got past age 9.

[mnhtnbb]

14. Really. It was a family story

that was told and retold for years and years. My father always got a kick out of it and to the day he passed I never knew when he was going to bring it up and start chuckling over it.

I probably was about 9.

[muriel_volestrangler]

11. Look, all it takes is a nuclear explosion, and the Moon's outa here

[UTUSN]

12. K&R

[electric_blue68]

16. honest to goodness I couldn't believe ...

he said, asked that!!!



Unbelievable!!!!!

[LetMyPeopleVote]

17. For this thread

Link to tweet

[mcar]

18. Perfect!

[Hugin]

19. !

Alternatively, it may not be safe for the kids, but, Smokey showing his furry Moon with a caption like, "This is the only Moon I can move and it is up to you."

[Buns_of_Fire]

20. All those magnetized people are disrupting the flow of gravity.

Not to mention really playing hell with my TV reception.