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Wed Nov 20, 2019, 05:00 PM

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-20: Wheel Of Corruption Presents Hobbs & Shaw Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-20: Wheel Of Corruption Presents Hobbs & Shaw Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! What’s up UC Berkeley? How you guys doing? You doing fucking good? Great! Can you believe that we have just 3 Top 10s left in 2019? And we will wrap everything up with a nice neat bow on it for our 2019 Year In Review edition on December 18th. But first we’ve got a lot of Top 10 news which will be unveiled on our… Best Of on the 27th. But since Christmas and New Year’s both fall on a Wednesday there will be no Best Of editions like we normally do, maybe a rerun or two. Do we have time for the thing? Of course we do, it’s my show. I make the rules, damn it! I mean despite what my producer says. So we’re beginning the home stretch of the regular NFL season and it’s time to talk playoffs. Do you have your Super Bowl plans yet? Well if you don’t and you’ve got some coin to blow, head over to Miami where our good friend Rob Gronkowski is throwing his first ever Gronk Beach Party! So let’s go over the options – the cheap tickets will run you $149 and can go anywhere to $499 plus you get open bar. Which is not too bad. Then you can throw in the meet & greet with Rob himself for $499. Oh sure I’ll take two! Now here’s where it gets weird, because of course you knew it was going to. so the VIP section ranges anywhere from $10,000 to $100,000. Like you can party at the Tiki Touchdown Table for $7500, or the Shake Your Tight End Table for $10K, or the Gronk Spike Table for $20K, or the Party Like A Gronk Star table for $30K, or you can get the whole “Ship” package for a mere $100K. Hey the alternative could be Trump’s party and you all know how excited they were to be there last year. I mean just look. OK that’s enough of the intro, but first John Oliver is back for the season finale and he reminds everyone why you shouldn’t fuck with the Census:

Hey everyone the famous Wheel Of Corruption is back for the last time this season!! Yay!!! Where do we begin this week? In the first slot this week is of course the guy who we currently call “president” and that’s Donald J. Trump. The impeachment hearings are not going well for him, especially on day 1 with Jim Jordan making a complete ass of himself. In the second slot this week is the White House (2) which is an absolute dumpster fire and they are not taking the impeachment trial very well. It will either be them or Trump but more likely Trump. Taking the 3rd slot this week is Stephen Miller and after Ilhan Omar puts in a request to the ACLU, the rumors are true and worse than we thought – Stephen Miller is indeed a white supremacist! For the 4th slot this week is Facebook (4). They are going hard trying to pass pro-conservative propaganda on controversial SCOTUS justice Brett Kavanaugh and silencing liberal voices on the subject. At slot #5 this week is our weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates (5) and this week the Center For Disease Control has issued a warning about bacteria-resistant superbugs that could possibly kill you! *cue horror music* At slot #6 this week is our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit” (6) and this week our resident pastor is on the ground in Houston as Kanye West takes his Sunday Sermon concept to Joel Osteen’s controversial Lakewood Church – and – wait for it – it’s being televised! Shocker, I know. In the 7th slot this week is “Beating A Dead Horse” (7) – was the CEO of Uber right to make his statement about the gruesome murder of Washington Post journalist Jamal Khashoogi? We’ll let you be the judge! At the #8 seed this week is a new edition of “NO!” – the State Of North Dakota is declaring war on a very serious meth problem in their state, but does anyone really want to be remembered as the face of crystal meth addiction? NO! In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week is a new People Are Dumb, because of course they are! And finally this week our 2020 voters’ guide “Keeping Up With The Candidates” (10) – with many candidates dropping out of the race at this point, why the hell is Michael Bloomberg just now announcing a run? We don’t need it, and billionaires are not your friends! Plus the palate cleanser this week for putting up with my bullshit – we have some live music from the legendary Alter Bridge! Buy their new album “Walk The Sky” or you’re no friend of this program! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Impeachment Trial Update
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Hey everyone say it with me: It’s time for the WHEEL OF CORRUPTION! YAY!!!!!

Of course you know the rules by now – I spin the wheel and we have to talk about whatever it lands on. Of course if it lands on the guacamole option, you know that it costs $1.50 extra. So here’s what is on the wheel this week:

- Guns
- Abortion
- Crime
- Poverty
- Elections
- Buy A Vowel
- Sex
- Clip Without Context
- Death
- Greed
- Spying
- Walls
- Food
- Elections
- The Border
- Donald Trump
- Clip Without Context
- Chance
- 5,000
- Bankrupt
- Community Chest
- Top 10 Investigates
- A Random Tweet
- Something Random In The News
- ‘Merica!
- Golf
- 10,000
- Morally Bankrupt
- Guacamole
- Clip Without Context
- Talk Shows
- Holy Shit
- Beating A Dead Horse
- This Fucking Guy
- How Is This Still A Thing?
- Intermission
- 15,000
- People Are Dumb
- Keeping Up With The Candidates
- I Need A Drink
- Infowars
- Go Directly To Jail
- T-Shirt Cannon
- Lightning Round
- Bonus Spin

This is the last Wheel Of Corruption edition for this season. But it will be back for next year! OK let’s get this party started! Spin that shit! And hey it’s A Random Tweet!


To which I respond: “Where’s your sanity?”. Oh wait, he has none. Spin it again! And it lands on Donald Trump! Folks, I don’t need to remind you of how absolutely batshit crazy the impeachment trial is going, and the fact that Trump and his enablers like Steve Scalise and Alex Jones are trying to intimidate people means that the Dems are really getting under their skin. See, impeachment isn’t an instant fix like so many are clamoring for. Instead it’s a long burn, slow boiling process and there’s many layers to it, and it will take a long time before the dust settles. But one thing is certain is that the republicans haven’t read past the keyword “inquiry”.

Pelosi also defined the president's bribe: "The bribe is to grant or withhold military assistance in return for a public statement of a fake investigation into the elections. That's bribery."

Bribery, she noted, is "in the Constitution attached to the impeachment proceeding."

On Wednesday, testimony from a career diplomat at the first public hearings of the impeachment inquiry opened new questions about what the president knew about the campaign to pressure Ukraine and when he knew it.

Bill Taylor, the top U.S. diplomat in Ukraine, relayed an account by a member of his staff, who said he overheard the president asking about "the investigations" one day after the now-infamous July 25 call between Mr. Trump and Volodymyr Zelensky, then the newly elected president of Ukraine.

Taylor testified that the staffer recently told him about a phone call he overheard between Mr. Trump and U.S. Ambassador to the EU Gordon Sondland in July, one day after Mr. Trump urged the Ukrainian president to "look into" the Bidens.

Yes, we can now add bribery to the growing list of crimes against Trump! As of right now it’s probably better to list the crimes he hasn’t committed. And really guys, can you shut up about George Soros already? Sheesh, that dead horse has been played out for the last 3 years. Even Trump used the 90 year old billionaire that conservatives think is a real life boogeyman. Give it a rest already!

Republicans and Donald Trump have sought to smear key witnesses in the impeachment inquiry against the president as having dual or mixed loyalties to the US, due to being born abroad.

The move has sparked condemnation as a bigoted tactic that has maligned career US diplomats and officials as being potentially disloyal to their adopted country due to not being born in America.

The attacks have focused on the Ukraine ambassador Marie Yovanovitch, the National Security Council Ukraine expert Alexander Vindman, and the former White House Russia security expert Fiona Hill.

Trump called the Canadian-born Yovanovitch “bad news”. The British-born Hill told congressional investigators that accusations against Yovanovitch related to a “mishmash of conspiracy theories … an idea of an association between her and George Soros”.

Hill also said far-right conspiracy theories that she herself was a “Soros mole in the White House, of colluding with all kinds of enemies of the President, and, you know, of various improprieties” resurfaced after her deposition before the House intelligence committee was announced.

Very wrong, Cartman, I know hippies who drive BMWs. But seriously you can now add “witness intimidation via Twitter” to the growing list of impeachable offenses that Trump has committed, even on live TV. Really, there’s no bottom. There’s no line they won’t cross, except of course for touching the 2nd amendment, that’s the infallible word of god don’t you know. And even the actual former ambassador to the Ukraine thinks Trump is full of shit:

Ukrainian officials arrived at the White House on July 10 expecting something approaching normal. They were in Washington for a scheduled meeting with then-National Security Adviser John Bolton with a plan to propose a new path for U.S.-Ukrainian relations under the umbrella of energy and security cooperation. All seemed to go well—until U.S. Ambassador to the European Union Gordon Sondland stepped in. “That’s when things really went off the rails,” one person in the room said.

It’s been widely noted in testimonies by multiple House impeachment witnesses that Sondland interrupted the conversation between Bolton and the Ukrainians when he suggested that the Kyiv officials open investigations into Hunter Biden and the gas company he worked for if they wanted President Volodymyr Zelensky to land a White House meeting with Donald Trump.

Bolton immediately cut the get-together short, witnesses said, in an attempt to save what had until then been a normal meeting. But what’s been less clear—until now—is what happened moments later, when Sondland guided the Ukrainians into the White House’s Ward Room. Three individuals familiar with the conversation described what happened next.

Sondland continued to not just relay, but demanded ferociously, that the Ukrainians open the Biden investigations, saying it was the only chance for Washington and Kyiv to develop any further meaningful relationship, two individuals with knowledge of Sondland’s overtures said.

So that happened. This administration is so incompetent that calling them a “dumpster fire” is definitely understating the situation. And instead since this administration is so reactionary, the appropriate thing to do is to just sweep it under the rug. No really, the White House is in full “move along, nothing to see here, please disperse” territory.

President Trump's public schedule next week is designed to keep him distracted from the televised hearings — and to counterprogram Week 2 of those hearings.

The big picture: Trump's schedule for the coming week shows him governing, promoting U.S. jobs and highlighting the arts and pop culture.

On Tuesday, as Democrats question Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman, Trump will be meeting with his Cabinet.
On Wednesday, as Democrats grill Trump megadonor turned EU Ambassador Gordon Sondland, Trump will he visiting Apple's manufacturing plant in Texas.
And on Thursday, after Democrats question Fiona Hill, Trump will be presenting the national medals of arts and humanities.

The bottom line: Trump, who'll cap the week by welcoming college athletes, will have built-in opportunities to address the cameras at all of these events. If he shows discipline, he can convey that he is carrying out the range of duties of the presidency while Democrats are focused on impeachment. But if last week is any guide, that's a big if.

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[font size="8"]Roger Stone
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Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… wait for it… oh hey it’s one of our patented clips without context!

Dude, seriously, you're on trial for colluding with Russia. You probably should at least switch to a booze that isn't, I don't know, made in Russia! Go with Beefeater Gin, it not only makes for a better martini, it also makes you look less guilty! Spin it again! And it lands on… crime! Folks, this is seriously one of the best things to happen this year, but Roger Stone is GUILTY!!!!! Oh that felt good to say that, he is guilty as shit! And that means that last week when we reported on Alex Jones’ attempt to harass the jurors (see: Idiots #7-19 ) didn’t fucking work. Thanks for playing, tell them what they’ve won, Johnny!

Roger Stone is guilty, and now his future might rest in Donald Trump’s hands.

A federal jury on Friday found the longtime Republican provocateur guilty on all charges for thwarting a House investigation into Russia’s 2016 election interference, opening up a political pandora’s box for a president already facing pressure from his conservative base to issue a pardon.

Stone’s fate was sealed after a trial that spanned just over a week, which concluded with unanimous guilty verdicts against Stone on five felony counts of lying to investigators, one count of obstructing a congressional probe and one count of witness tampering.

Stone stood and braced himself with his fingers on the counsel table as the seven guilty verdicts were read. He showed no visible reaction, but he put on his glasses to look at the jurors as the nine women and three men were then polled individually at the defense’s request to confirm their agreement with the verdicts.

Damn right he’s guilty! Roger Stone can now go peddle his conspiracy theories to the wall of a jail cell and any other prisoners who might be listening. But what happens when a fellow conspiracy theorist joins the fray? Well you can expect the shit storm that’s already been brewing to become a Category 5, though their BFF Trump will definitely say that no such thing exists.

Roger Stone is precisely why 7.8% of Americans suffer from coulrophobia, or fear of clowns. You can add 100% of the jury in this case. Stone has insisted that what he does in politics is “performance art. Sometimes for its own sake.” However, this performance art seemed to work for not only its own sake, but for the sake of Stone, and ultimately Trump.

The most damaging was Stone’s warning to Randy Credico, who was called as a witness to speak to any effort of Stone's to obtain hacked emails from WikiLeaks. Referencing a character in “The Godfather: Part II," Stone told Credico to “Practice your Frank Pentangeli.” In the movie, Frank "Frankie Five Angels" Pentangeli committed suicide after lying to Congress to protect the mob.

The statement was vintage Stone: reckless, alarming, and, yes, entertaining. The problem with being a performance artist is when your performance is suggesting a criminal act.

Jones said that Stone was certain of his own demise before the verdict was returned. It was not hard to predict. Not only did Stone decline to testify but his team put forward a defense as opaque and convoluted as Stone himself.

Seriously, this is like a Scorsese movie except everyone involved is an idiot. So if the president’s fixer is found guilty of crimes relating to the president, what does this mean? Well if you can guess that Trump is literally saying everything wrong about this trial that he possibly can, well, you win today’s “pretend to be shocked” award.

NBC News’ report added that Stone is scheduled to be sentenced in February, and he faces up to 20 years in prison.

Though Donald Trump was obviously not on trial in this case, the president was hardly on the periphery of the proceedings. Roger Stone is a longtime Trump ally who briefly worked for the future president’s campaign operation in 2015. Indeed, much of the case centered on Trump and Stone’s interactions between WikiLeaks and the Trump campaign.

Both Steve Bannon and Rick Gates – two top officials from Trump’s political operation – testified in the trial, and prosecutor Aaron Zelinsky explicitly made the case that Stone’s crimes were motivated by his belief that “the truth looked bad for Donald Trump.”

And speaking of the Republican president, Trump responded to Stone’s conviction in a decidedly Trumpian way.

“So they now convict Roger Stone of lying and want to jail him for many years to come,” the president tweeted. “Well, what about Crooked Hillary, Comey, Strzok, Page, McCabe, Brennan, Clapper, Shifty Schiff, Ohr & Nellie, Steele & all of the others, including even Mueller himself? Didn’t they lie?”

Trump added, “A double standard like never seen before in the history of our Country?”

Seriously Trump wouldn’t know what a double standard is if it jumped up and bit him on the ass. These are rich old conservative white men here. They are the standard! But you know one person who we haven’t touched on in a while is our old Wikileaks friend Julian Assange, who has left the confines of the comfy Ecuadorian embassy in London (which he abused) and hasn’t been seen or heard from since, but he could be dragged back into the fray.

President Trump's friend and political adviser Roger Stone is set to go on trial Tuesday in a proceeding that could reveal just how close Trump world got to the Russian interference in the 2016 election.

Jury selection is scheduled to commence following months of unusual public silence from Stone, who has been gagged by the judge in his case following a flap this year over his posts on social media.

Stone pleaded not guilty in January after a grand jury in Washington, D.C., returned an indictment with one count of obstructing a proceeding, five counts of making false statements to Congress and one count of witness tampering — because prosecutors allege that he tried to persuade another witness to lie to Congress too.

Neither Stone nor any other Trump insider has been charged with colluding with Russia's interference in the 2016 election; former Justice Department special counsel Robert Mueller concluded that there wasn't enough evidence to bring a case of conspiracy.

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[font size="8"]Stephen Miller
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Let’s spin the wheel and see where it lands shall we? Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop!!! Oh it’s one of our patented clips without context!

I’m pretty sure that Congress is the one who started impeachment of Trump. But if you’re hearing demonic voices suggesting this, I suggest you go see a psychiatrist ASAP. Spin it again! And it lands on… racism! So racism is one of the cornerstones of the Donald J. Trump presidency, and there’s no one in the administration more racist than Stephen Miller. Don’t boo yet. Because New York Congresswoman and future star of the eventual telenovela made of this whole insane show, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, a favorite target of Trump, put in an inquiry with the Southern Poverty Law Center about just how racist Stephen Miller is. And the results are not only not at all shocking, but way more horrifying than you could ever possibly imagine!

A cache of emails revealed this week in which White House senior policy adviser Stephen Miller, in the run-up to the 2016 election, shared articles and websites affiliated with white nationalism has disturbed officials working in the Department of Homeland Security and Justice Department, who called the emails “sickening” and “proof” that Miller has been steering a racist immigration policy under President Trump.

The emails sent from Miller to editors of the far-right website Breitbart and obtained by the Southern Poverty Law Center show Miller sharing a story from the white nationalist site VDare, pushing for Breitbart to write about a novel popular among white nationalists, and linking to a report detailing second-generation Muslims with the subject line “Huge Surge in US newborns named 'Mohammed.’”

The civil rights nonprofit said that after reviewing 900 emails, it was “unable to find any examples of Miller writing sympathetically or even in neutral tones about any person who is nonwhite or foreign-born.” In one such email chain, the SPLC said Miller directed Breitbart reporter Katie McHugh, who supplied the emails to the group, to aggregate information from American Renaissance, a white supremacist journal, for a story on crimes committed by nonwhite people.

“It’s sickening to know that someone with these viewpoints held a position of trust for a United States Senator," said one DHS official, referring to former senator and attorney general Jeff Sessions, "and now in the White House. Not that it wasn’t clear before — these emails just confirm what we all know. I’m disgusted that my venerable agency has turned into his personal tool for hate.”

I’m pretty sure that’s actual footage of Stephen Miller when he found out. But he really doesn’t look that far off from Hannibal Lecter. You know what? Forget about Hillary’s emails, I want to see Stephen Miller’s emails. After all, he’s going full Hitler, and you never, ever go full Hitler. So really just how racist is Stephen Miller? Well he’s pretty damn racist if you ask us!

White House adviser Stephen Miller on Sunday pushed back against those who believe President Donald Trump is a racist or is engaging in racist rhetoric, arguing the liberals use that label to censor their opponents.

"Fox News Sunday" host Chris Wallace listed several of Trump's statements that have been decried as racist, including his recent suggestion that four congresswomen of color "go back and help fix the totally broken and crime-infested places from which they came," his unsubstantiated claims that former President Barack Obama was not a U.S. citizen, his campaign announcement in which he said Mexicans "are rapists," his call for a "complete shutdown on Muslims entering the United States," and his assertion that there were good people on "both sides" of a clash between white nationalists and counterprotesters at the "Unite the Right" rally in Charlottesville, Virginia.

"Why shouldn't someone see all of that as racist?" Wallace asked Miller.

"I think the term 'racist,' Chris, has become a label that is too often deployed by the left, Democrats in this country simply to try to silence and punish and suppress people they disagree with, speech that they don't want to hear," Miller said.

Damn straight! Just how racist was it? Yes…. .HOW RACIST WAS IT??? You know what? Let us know in the comments how racist that was. What’s really scary about this is that this guy is in the White House making policies. And don’t get me started on how someone is actually agreeing to marry this complete psychopath. However, if Trump has his back, well, just remember that you can always judge a person by the company they keep!

When the Southern Poverty Law Center’s blog Hatewatch revealed on Tuesday that Stephen Miller had pushed racist—and explicitly white-nationalist—content over and over again in 2015 and 2016, President Donald Trump’s senior policy adviser didn’t need any reassurances from his boss or his colleagues that his job was safe. Practically everyone in the building already knew it.

“Stephen is not going anywhere,” a senior White House official said on Tuesday afternoon, shortly after the story started going viral. “The president has his back.”

Since then, six other senior Trump administration officials with knowledge of Miller’s standing with the president and top staffers have all individually told The Daily Beast that the story did not endanger Miller’s position, or change Trump’s favorable view of him. Two of them literally laughed at the mere suggestion that the Hatewatch exposé could have toppled or hobbled the top Trump adviser.

Katie McHugh, a disgraced former Breitbart staffer who provided Hatewatch with the trove of emails, told the blog that Miller had personally flagged for her in July 2015 an American Renaissance “article about crime statistics and race.” American Renaissance is a white-supremacist website beloved by fascists and alt-right adherents. McHugh added, “I responded in the affirmative because I had read it. Many of us [on the far-right] had read it. I remember being struck by the way he called it ‘AmRen,’ the nickname.”

Just a little bit? He’s a full blown white nationalist, and Trump has his back! Yes, I will repeat that – Trump has his back! While there’s been many, many firings in the Trump administration, the fact that Stephen Miller still has a job is astonishing. This guy is making policy. He is directly advising Trump on immigration policies. You don’t want a racist in charge of immigration policies. That’s where we get… well, you know.

Miller was appointed senior policy adviser to the Trump campaign in January 2016 and later joined President Donald Trump’s transition team. He currently advises the president on immigration policy and is credited with spearheading Trump’s hard-line efforts on border security.

Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, D-N.Y., tweeted a petition demanding Miller’s resignation.

“Stephen Miller must resign. Now,” Ocasio-Cortez tweeted. “Each day we allow a white nationalist to be in charge of US immigration policy is a day where thousands of children & families lives are in danger.”

Other Democratic politicians made similar statements. Rep. Ilhan Omar, D-Minn., said Miller needs to step down. Democratic presidential candidate Julián Castro called Miller and Trump “a shame to our nation.” Rep. Earl Blumenauer, D-Ore., tweeted that Trump should fire Miller immediately.

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[font size="8"]Brett Kavanaugh
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Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… wait for it… NO!!!! A whammy!!!!

Spin it again. Sex! Once again, the most controversial justice sitting on the SCOTUS is no longer Clarence Thomas. Instead it’s Brett Kavanaugh. And in an instance of what one might consider to be extremely poor timing, Facebook – yeah you know that website that you use to hurl insults at your ex and find out which of your relatives has been posting angry diatribes against the government – bet you didn’t know it was Aunt Carol, did you? How could you, Aunt Carol? Facebook is owned by some predominantly right wing people. Led of course by Jessie Eisenberg impersonator Mark Zuckerberg. And I only assume that casting was because he shares the word “berg” in their last name. I’m getting carried away here. Facebook is courting Brett Kavanaugh by sponsoring the group he’s most commonly associated with – the Federalist Society. And it’s generating a lot of controversy. I mean a lot.

After hearing that Facebook is sponsoring a dinner Thursday night hosted by right-wing judicial advocacy group the Federalist Society honoring Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh, progressive advocacy group Demand Justice launched an ad campaign targeted at the company's employees in Menlo Park, California.

Facebook is listed as a "Gold Circle" sponsor of the Antonin Scalia Memorial Dinner. Kavanaugh is set to speak at the event, an arrangement which Demand Justice said makes Facebook complicit in "the rehabbing of Brett Kavanaugh's reputation" after Christine Blasey Ford testified under oath in 2018 that the judge sexually assaulted her when they were in high school.

While today Kavanaugh enjoys a lifetime appointment to the Supreme Court, Demand Justice senior counsel Katie O'Connor said in a statement, "Dr. Blasey Ford remains unable to resume a normal life after bravely coming forward last year. You can claim to respect survivors of sexual assault or you can pay for a celebration of Brett Kavanaugh, but you can't do both."

Targeted web ads will reach Facebook employees on LinkedIn and cell phone banner ads will display on phones near Facebook's headquarters.

Yeah this is the real life equivalent of a guy making a poorly timed joke about a tragedy and the room turns silent, and he follows it up with “too soon?”. It’s no secret that Mark Zuckerberg has predominately conservative leanings, yet he gets grilled every day by Congress about the bizarre concept of “shadow banning” like he’s some sort of conservative boogeyman. And don’t get me started on that. So Kavanaugh gets a lifetime to SCOTUS while Dr. Ford is living in hiding and getting death threats every day. Makes sense. Makes even more sense when Elizabeth Warren is slamming this nonsense.

Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-MA) has continued in her rebukes of Facebook after the firm sponsored a conservative event where Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh spoke.

The presidential hopeful accused the tech giant of trying to charm Republican lawmakers—even accusing it of corruption—while the firm undergoes four separate government antitrust investigations.

Legislators and lawmakers at state and federal level have continued to examine Facebook's role in the Cambridge Analytica scandal, and the company's head of mergers and acquisitions faced questions about its role in the $1 billion acquisition of Instagram in Capitol Hill this week.

Warren's comments came as reports spread that Facebook was a "gold circle" sponsor of the Federalist Society's annual Antonin Scalia memorial dinner in Washington, D.C. on Thursday.

"Facebook is spending millions lobbying the government as they face antitrust scrutiny," she said. "They're going on a charm offensive with Republican lawmakers. Now, they're sponsoring a din

Yeah seriously too soon. And the Trump train is a train you don’t want to be on. Trump Airlines went out of business and the SS Trumptanic has crashed into the iceberg. Speaking of which, this could be the iceberg for Facebook. Even Zuckerberg’s own employees are divided on this subject. Even after all the shit that the Trump admin has put us through, they still continue to divide us.

Facebook is sponsoring an event at which US Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh is speaking — a move that risks employee unrest, and that has sparked immediate protests from activist groups.

On Thursday, political newsletter Popular Information reported that Facebook will be a "gold sponsor" for an upcoming convention by conservative law group The Federalist Society, at which Kavanaugh will appear as the keynote speaker on Thursday.

After being nominated by President Trump, Kavanaugh was confirmed to the Supreme Court in October 2018 following a bitter political battle and multiple allegations of sexual misconduct were made against him, which he denied. The fight inflamed Facebook's largely-liberal employee base after Joel Kaplan, Facebook's VP of global public policy, appeared in the audience at the hearing in support of Kavanaugh. Kaplan previously worked at the White House under the George W. Bush administration, and he and Kavanaugh are personal friends.

Some employees were outraged, calling his appearance "inappropriate."

Yes it is sir and thank you for pointing that out. It is totally inappropriate. But thankfully at least we have advertising on our side. I mean it’s really sad when that’s your last line of defense, because let’s face it, nobody pays attention to the ads anymore. But even the ads are being critical of Brett Kavanaugh, at least somebody is!

An advocacy group is targeting Facebook employees with ads on LinkedIn, objecting to the company’s support of an event honoring Supreme Court justice Brett Kavanaugh. The group, Demand Justice, has a clear message for employees: “Tell Facebook: stop funding the fight to normalize Brett Kavanaugh.”

Facebook is the only tech company listed as a “Gold Circle” sponsor for a Federalist Society event to be held in Washington, DC. On November 14th, Kavanaugh will give a speech at the Antonin Scalia memorial dinner as part of the group’s annual convention.

Other tech companies, such as Google, have sponsored Federalist Society events in the past, but Facebook has a complicated history with Kavanaugh. Last year, a company executive sat behind the then-Supreme Court nominee as he testified before Congress, attempting to rebut the allegations that he had sexually assaulted Christine Blasey Ford when they were both in high school. Joel Kaplan, Facebook’s vice president of global affairs, said he had known Kavanaugh for more than 20 years and considered the man a close friend.

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Bacteria Resistant Super Bugs
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Now entering the spin cycle! No whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Ah it’s another clip without context!

To which I say I don’t think Tom has seen a single episode of Gossip Girl! Spin it again! Hey it’s time for Top 10 Investigates! It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates!

The biggest threat to your personal safety isn’t Al-Qaeda or ISIS. It’s not terrorism. The biggest threat to your safety is germs. And recently these viruses have grown, mutated and evolved to the point where they are resistant to anti-bacteria agents. Because there’s not enough things that can kill you, we need more of them. The Center For Disease Control calls this phenomenon a “super bug”. And we can’t be the only ones afraid when the virus sounds like it could take on Mecha Godzilla. So just how deadly is the latest strain of superbugs that are infecting the masses? They are a lot deadlier than you might think, and something that you should be afraid of. Very afraid of.

A drug-resistant fungus infection called "a serious global health threat" by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has been confirmed in Georgia for the first time. New federal health data was released this week about a dangerous, drug-resistant fungal infection that's risen in 14 states, including Georgia, over the past seven months. Cases of "Candida auris" are a sometimes fatal fungal infection that is emerging globally, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

As of late October, one confirmed cases of the infection have been confirmed in Georgia.

New York has confirmed 388 cases of Candida auris infection, followed by 227 cases in Illinois and 137 cases in New Jersey. Nationwide, more than 800 cases have been confirmed, along with 30 probable cases.

A CDC report released on Wednesday placed Candida auris among five "superbugs" that are considered "urgent threats" to the United States, killing someone in the United States every 15 minutes. The same report says more than 2.8 million antibiotic-resistant infections occur in the United States each year, and more than 35,000 people die as a result.

Yes, holy shit indeed. This could be a serious problem in the long run especially if there’s no drugs that can be developed prior to an outbreak of the disease. But it gets worse. Oh it gets so much worse. In fact the super bugs could kill as many as 35,000 people per year if not treated properly. And it’s not some post apocalyptic, head for the basement bunker level of fear mongering. This is something that you should prepare for now.

A new report has revealed that drug-resistant “superbugs” are deadlier than originally thought.

The new antibiotic resistance threats report comes from the Center for Disease Control and Prevention and highlights the increased threat of these drug-resistant infections. According to the report, nearly 2.8 million people suffer infections from these “superbugs” every year.

Of those, 35,000 people die from these stronger infections.

The report was formulated by looking at bacteria and fungi, finding 21 different infections and categorizing them as “urgent threats,” “serious threats,” “concerning threats,” and “watch list.” However, it does not include parasites or viruses like influenza or HIV.

The results of the 2019 report are also higher than in the previous AR threat report published in 2013. It was found at the time that around 2 million people suffered from drug-resistant infections, with nearly 23,000 dying from said infections.

“Germs continue to spread and develop new types of resistance, and progress may be undermined by some community-associated infections that are on the rise,” the report says. “While the development of new treatments is one of these key actions, such investments must be coupled with dedicated efforts toward preventing infections in the first place, slowing the development of resistance through better antibiotic use, and stopping the spread of resistance when it does develop to protect American lives now and in the future.”

Yes it is terrifying. Cue the horror music. In fact you might be asking “how deadly is this new strain of bacteria” that is infecting more than you can count? Well… HOW DEADLY IS IT? It is so deadly that it kills someone every 15 minutes. And you were expecting a punchline there, weren’t you? Well, unfortunately we got nothing. And it’s very difficult to put into words the seriousness of this potentially deadly problem.

Every 15 minutes, someone in the United States dies of a superbug that has learned to outsmart even our most sophisticated antibiotics, according to a new report from the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

That’s about 35,000 deaths each year from drug-resistant infections, according to the landmark report.

The report places five drug-resistant superbugs on the CDC’s “urgent threat” list — two more germs than were on the CDC’s list in 2013, the last time the agency issued a report on antibiotic resistance.

Genetic research shows germs have become especially adept at teaching each other how to outwit antibiotics.

“Some miracle drugs no longer perform miracles,” according to the report.

The report also notes that while superbug infections in hospitals are down, some infections caught elsewhere — anywhere in the community — have increased.

That’s probably live footage of tests that they had in the lab when detecting this new killer strain of super bugs and there’s some good news. Is that while the CDC is stating that the infections may set medicine back a century or more, the good news is that less people are dying from it. And by less, we mean that’s the operative keyword there. There’s still people dying from these diseases but you’re less likely to now.

Drug-resistant “superbug” infections have been called a developing nightmare that could set medicine back a century, making conquered germs once again untreatable.

So there’s some surprising news in a report released Wednesday: U.S. superbug deaths appear to be going down.

About 36,000 Americans died from drug-resistant infections in 2017, down 18% from an estimated 44,000 in 2013, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimated. The decline is mainly attributed to an intense effort in hospitals to control the spread of particularly dangerous infections.

“We are pushing back in a battle we were losing,” said Michael Kirsch, a pharmacist at AdventHealth Tampa, a Florida hospital that has seen lower superbug infection rates. “I would not by any means declare success.”

Indeed, though deaths are going down, nonfatal infections grew nationally from 2.6 million in 2013 to 2.8 million in 2017. Some worrisome new germs are emerging. And superbugs are appearing much more often outside of hospitals, the report says.

That’s it this week for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop ! Intermission! I’ll just sit here and amuse myself with my phone. Go, play the music!

OK we’re back! Spin it again! Oh hey it’s time for Holy Shit!

Gather around my fair brothers and sisters of UC Berkeley! It’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time to remind you that the holiest among us are the most full of:

My fair congregation! So we went to Houston over the weekend. I know we were just there, but we had to go back. Why? Well apparently Kanye is dabbling into the world of televangelism by meeting with prosperity gospel preacher Joel Osteen and his stadium filling Lakewood Church. Yes, we have talked a lot about Kanye’s journey into religion. But in the interest of being fair – we’re wondering if he’s doing it because he’s actually a man of GAWD or is it because his GAWD happens to be the almighty dollar? Well Ye definitely has a lot of studying to do before he is to be called a man of GAWD because he clearly doesn’t get the message.

Kanye West is opening up about his faith.

The Jesus Is King rapper, 42, stopped by pastor Joel Osteen‘s Lakewood Church in Houston, Texas, on Sunday, where he spoke a little about his spiritual journey.

“I know that God’s been calling me for a long time and the devil’s been distracting me for a long time,” he said while standing with the pastor in Osteen’s megachurch.

“When I was in my lowest points, God was there with me and sending me visions and inspiring me, and I remember sitting in the hospital at UCLA after having a mental breakdown and there’s documentation of me drawing a church and [wanting to] start a church in the middle of Calabasas,” he added, referring to his 2016 hospitalization during his Saint Pablo tour.

West, who has spoken at length in recent months about his faith, went on to share despite “all of that arrogance and cockiness that y’all have seen from me” in the past, “God is now using him.”

“Because every time I stand up, I feel that I’m standing up and drawing a line in the sand and saying, ‘I’m here in service to God and no weapon formed against me shall prosper,’ ” he said.

Yes, Ye, it’s pretty bad when JAYSUS does it! And I mean come on can you really call yourself a man of GAWD if you appear before a certified huckster like Joel Osteen? I mean come on it’s in the Good Book – well at least our Good Book anyway! JAYSUS doesn’t want your big sermon or rock opera, he just wants you to praise him. Can I get an amen??? And would anyone be surprised that there were long lines and the show started late? I am not.

The “greatest artist that God has ever created” — that would be Kanye West’s new, self-given title — brought his Sunday Service Experience to Joel Osteen’s Lakewood Church on Sunday night.

After a morning chat with Osteen and his megachurch congregation — during which the rapper declared himself the “greatest artist...” — West returned with his gospel for a performance, which was also livestreamed, like every service is, on Facebook, YouTube, the church’s website and on Joel Osteen’s SiriusXM’s radio channel. While it started late, due to long entrance lines, he West did complete the show, which doesn’t always happen, and it was largely enjoyed.

The lines to get in were “ridiculous.” West appeared at the 11 a.m. service with Osteen for a conversation about faith and his fabulousness, at which wife Kim Kardashian was front and center. While he then had hours before his Sunday Service Experience performance was scheduled to begin at 7 p.m. that night, people began lining up right away in hopes of getting a good general admission seat to the show, leading to some chaos. There was a lot of griping about the lines on social media, and local news station KTRK said the issue had to do with the extra entry security, including each person going through a metal detector. Some concertgoers, still in line when the show started, streamed the show on their phones as they waited.

People rushed the venue to grab seats. Once inside, people raced to their seats, creating even more of a frenzy. We know that while the tickets were free, many were snatched up and resold — some for $300 each — and people clearly wanted to get their money’s worth.

Yes, even the good LAWRD thinks this is ridiculous. Well I will give Ye the benefit of the doubt here in that his music is bringing people together. I mean who thought that dueling Texas reps from different parties would be sitting right next to each other front row center at Lakewood last Sunday? I mean that is something that the good LAWRD JAYSUS would actually want!

Who says bipartisanship doesn’t exist?

Texas Reps. Dan Crenshaw and Sheila Jackson Lee proved us wrong at Kanye West’s highly talked about Sunday Service at Lakewood Church in Houston, per Crenshaw’s Instagram.

[California ice cream shop milks D.C. impeachment hearings]

Crenshaw, a Republican, and Jackson Lee, a Democrat, appear next to each other in the front row — or close enough to feel any sweat (or holy water) that could fling from Kanye and his gospel choir.

Crenshaw shared videos on Instagram from his evening. Kanye’s wife Kim Kardashian West and daughter North briefly appear in one video, moving swiftly past the congressman to the side of the stage.

Ahead of the artist’s Sunday performance, he and his choir sang for inmates at two Houston jails, prompting praise from Crenshaw and Texas governor Greg Abbott.

No sir, JAYSUS is the best! But that said I still don’t think that Ye quite gets the message that JAYSUS is trying to convey. No, we don’t need him running for president. And no, we definitely don’t need him changing his name to Christian Genius Billionaire. I mean really, if you have to tell me you’re all 3 of those things, especially in your own name, then my friend, you aren’t any of those things!

Kanye West was recently named one of the world's wealthiest hip hop artists by Forbes, with the publication estimating his net worth at $240 million. West, however, wants you to know he's not a millionaire — he's a billionaire. The rapper floated the idea of legally changing his name to "Christian Genius Billionaire Kanye West," just so everyone knows it.

"Martin Luther King didn't get killed because he had a dream; he had something else he was gong to talk about. He talked about black empowerment, economic empowerment," West said at the Fast Company Innovation Festival, according to The Hollywood Reporter (THR). "When I did Forbes, I showed them a $890 million receipt and they still didn't say 'billionaire.'"

"They don't want us to know that we can buy land; they don't want us to have the 100 percent ownership [that] I have at Yeezy," West continued, referring his fashion line, which Forbes did estimate would top $1.5 billion this year. "When people say it's crass to call yourself a billionaire, I say I might legally change my name to Christian Genius Billionaire Kanye West for a year until y'all understand exactly what it is… It will be on the license plate."

If West does stick with the name change, we could be seeing "Christian Genius Billionaire Kanye West" on the 2024 presidential ballot. The Chicago native also addressed that prospect during the Fast Company talk. "When I run for president in 2024 —" he started, before laughter from the audience interrupted him. "What y'all laughing at? We would create so many jobs!"

Yes sir, this is fame! But no, I do not want to see a president calling himself “Christian Genius Billionaire” Kanye West. Even JAYSUS would be smiting him! Can I get an amen? Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse: Uber Vs Khashoogi
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Hey everyone let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… wait for it… oh hey it’s another one of our patented clips without context!

I’d be willing to go out on a limb here and say that these two have probably never actually read Dante’s Inferno, because I’m pretty sure that we’re living in hell now. Thank you! spin it again! Oh hey it’s time for Beating A Dead Horse!

You know we live in an unusual time where people will often times, shall we say, barf their brain, like what our president currently does on his Twitter feed. Except that the difference between your average citizen and @realDonaldTrump is, Trump says the most vicious shit imaginable and he does not apologize for any of it. Now here’s the thing – this is the year 2019 here. We have access to this thing called “social media”. And when you say something that might be misconstrued in a certain context, well, people get mad. Then you add social media, and people get really mad. Take for instance, Uber CEO, and I hope I’m pronouncing this correctly – Dara Khosrowshahi, or as Deadpool says I’m not even gonna attempt that. We’re all still trying to figure out how the gruesome state-sanctioned murder of Washington Post journalist Jamal Khashoogi was allowed to happen, and here’s one of those situations where you should probably think before you speak.

Uber CEO Dara Khosrowshahi is being criticized for calling the murder of a Washington Post columnist "a mistake" and comparing it to the death of a pedestrian struck by one of the company's autonomous vehicles.

Khosrowshahi later said he regretted his comments, made during an interview with Axios on HBO. He tweeted Monday that there's no forgiving or forgetting what happened to the journalist Jamal Khashoggi and he was wrong to call it a mistake.

Critics say Khosrowshahi is downplaying Khashoggi's grisly murder to placate one of the company's biggest investors.

Saudi Arabia's sovereign wealth fund, known as The Public Investment Fund, holds about $1.9 billion worth of Uber stock, making it the company's fifth largest stakeholder. Its managing director, Yasir Al-Rumayyan, sits on Uber's board.

Officials with the U.S. and the United Nations suspect that Saudi Arabia's Prince Mohammed bin Salman played a role in Khashoggi's slaying. Prince Mohammed has said he takes full responsibility but denied ordering the killing, calling the slaying "a mistake" in an interview in September.

Holy shit, indeed, sir! And yeah damn right it was a mistake. I mean do you see how much money Uber pulls in a year? You know how many customers you could lose with that kind of comment? Here’s the thing – the state-sanctioned murder of Jamal Khashoogi was not just a “mistake”. A mistake is drunk dialing Uber after a concert and coming home and discovering that your bill was $200 thanks to the surcharges, that is a fucking mistake! Believe me I’ve been there. No, this was a colossal fuck up, a state sanctioned murder and a total conspiracy to cover up exactly how horrifying it was. Just… what the fuck!

Uber CEO Dara Khosrowshahi is under fire for calling the murder of a Washington Post columnist a "mistake," despite his attempts to curb the damage from his comments.

Khosrowshahi, who also compared the slaying of Jamal Khashoggi to the death of a pedestrian hit by one of his company's autonomous vehicles, on Monday said he regretted the comments, made during an interview with Axios on HBO. He tweeted that there's no forgiving or forgetting what happened to the murdered journalist and he was wrong to call it a mistake.

Still, #BoycottUber began to trend Monday on Twitter, with some critics taking to social media to bash Khosrowshahi's words while suggesting that they were meant to downplay Khashoggi's grisly murder in order to mollify one of the company's largest investors.

Saudi Arabia's sovereign wealth fund, known as the Public Investment Fund, holds about $1.9 billion worth of Uber stock, making it the company's fifth largest stakeholder. Its managing director, Yasir Al-Rumayyan, sits on Uber's board.

"This is what happens when you're a greedy CEO and a murderous regime is your 5th largest shareholder," said one Twitter user in urging a boycott of the ride-hailing company.

Actually, Kanye, yes, we are serious. And I love that the first response to something like this is always to boycott, because we’ve seen time and time again on this program just how well that works out. Because this is 2019 and everyone is looking for the quick fix which is, just go away. Here’s the thing though, you can’t make the government of the wealthiest, most powerful and most evil countries on earth simply disappear. Unless that is…

I mean seriously you know your country is evil when your capital city has a building in their skyline that looks like the Eye Of Sauron!

Well getting back on topic, those words could have egregious consequences for Uber:

"I said something in the moment I don't believe. Our investors have long known my views here & I'm sorry I wasn’t as clear on Axios."

Khashoggi's killing sparked a global uproar, tarnishing the image of Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman.

The CIA and some Western governments have said they believe the crown prince ordered Khashoggi's killing. Prince Mohammed has denied that but said he bore ultimate responsibility as the country's de facto leader.

Asked about the CIA's assessment of the crown prince's involvement, Khosrowshahi said: "I didn't read that part of the CIA report ... but I think from a Saudi perspective, they're just like any other shareholder."

Saudi sovereign wealth fund PIF acquired a 5% stake in Uber in 2016 worth $3.5 billion. Its chairman sits on the board.

Yeah seriously. I mean he wasn’t clear? That was a mistake. The state sanctioned murder of Khashoogi wasn’t a mistake. By the way in case you’re wondering what Uber’s real intentions were, the reason why Mr. I’m not even gonna attempt that, is in charge of Uber, it’s because their CEO decided to bail and profited very handsomely from Saudi investments following Khashoogi’s murder.

Uber co-founder’s newest startup received $400 million from Saudia Arabia’s PIF 11 months ago.
PIF’s investment in Uber is over $1 billion in the red since the IPO.
The report comes just over a year since the brutal murder of Jamal Khashoggi.

Despite Uber’s poor showing, Saudi Arabia’s appetite for investing in U.S. startups shows no signs of waning with the country now adding a kitchen rental startup to its portfolio. This is despite the negative press the country received following the murder of Washington Post columnist and U.S. resident Jamal Khashoggi.

According to The Wall Street Journal, the Public Investment Fund (PIF) invested $400 million in CloudKitchens in January. This makes the kitchen rental startup, which was formed by Uber founder Travis Kalanick, the earliest beneficiary of the cash-flush fund following the Khashoggi killing.

The startup is currently valued at around $5 billion. PIF’s investment in CloudKitchens now exceeds what Kalanick himself has put in ($300 million).

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[font size="8"]No: The Face Of Meth Addiction
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Let’s spin the wheel shall we? And it lands on… wait for it… Donald Trump.

Damn you auto correct!!! That happened. When I see Trump misspelling a word trending on Twitter, the first thing I can think of is that joke from the Simpsons where Homer tries to dial his phone only to hear “The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, press 1 now.” Spin it again! And it lands on… NO!

Meth is a hell of a drug. And – shocker – people can get addicted to it very easily. But does anyone want to be remembered as the face of meth addiction? That’s what the state of South Dakota is doing betting on an advertising campaign to bring awareness to the problem. Of course like most anti-drug awareness campaigns it only has the reverse effect in that it’s going to raise people’s self awareness of the drug itself. What? You mean we can inhale smoke that tastes like vanilla ice cream? Cool! And in case you’re wondering what I’m getting at, before we get into the meat of the story, let’s check out what happened when Florida Man’s brother, Arkansas Man, attempted to break into the meth business. And unlike Walter White, these guys didn’t exactly fail upwards.

Terry David Bateman, 45, and Bradley Allen Rowland, 40, both associate professors of chemistry at Henderson State University in Arkadelphia, Arkansas, were taken into custody Friday afternoon, the sheriff's department said in a news release. They face charges of manufacturing methamphetamine and using drug paraphernalia.

A university science center was closed October 8 after someone reported a chemical odor, Tina Hall, the university's associate vice president of marketing and communications, said in a statement.

The building was reopened October 29 after the on-call environmental service completed remediation work that included air filtering systems and temporarily removed some windows to help ventilation, Hall said.

Hall would not elaborate on what was found following the report of a chemical odor, nor would she confirm whether the professors were suspected of making meth inside the school.

Come on, they haven’t seen Breaking Bad? I wonder which one of them is the one who knocks? But seriously these are the kind of people who inspired this campaign and why we need it. However, the ads aren’t exactly what one would call “flattering”. Let’s show one.

Oh not the football team come on, man! And kids, wouldn’t you know that meth isn’t exactly what one would call a “performance enhancer”? If anything it’s a performance hinder. But here’s how much that campaign is backfiring.

South Dakota governor Kristi Noem unveiled her state's new anti-drug campaign on Monday, but many are criticizing the program's name, "Meth. We're On It."

The Argus Leader reported that the state spent $449,000 on the program, which includes television advertising, billboards, posters and a website.

Noem released a video today where she introduces the campaign. In it, she says "South Dakota's meth crisis is growing at an alarming rate. It impacts every community in our state, and it threatens the success of the next generation" and asks South Dakotans to call a toll-free number to report meth-related behavior or people who need help getting off the drug."

The new campaign is only a part of Noem's attempt to address South Dakota's drug program. When she presented her state budget in January, the governor carved out $4.6 million towards anti-methamphetamine efforts.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. OK it’s cool. But really while drugs are a serious problem in the rural areas, is this something that we really need right now? When it comes to drugs, the biggest drugs circulating in the rural areas are meth and fentanyl. While most call fentanyl the deadliest drug in the world, it’s actually the meth that kills more. Both by use, and by collateral. I mean we’ve all seen Breaking Bad, right?

Fentanyl remains the deadliest drug in the United States. But in some areas of the country, methamphetamine kills more people.

A new report from the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s National Center for Health Statistics found that fentanyl is the drug most commonly identified in fatal overdoses. In 2017, fentanyl was associated with 38.9% of all drug overdose deaths, an increase from 2016, when it was associated with 29% of all fatal overdoses. This is the second year that CDC analyzed fatal overdoses in this way.

In 2017, heroin was associated with 22.8% of all fatal overdoses. Cocaine, a stimulant, was involved in 21.3% and methamphetamine, also a stimulant, was involved in 13.3%.

Other drugs linked to overdose deaths were benzodiazepines; diphenhydramine, an antihistamine; and gabapentin, an anticonvulsant.

OK we get it, dude! Chill! But you got to hand it to social media though. Even though there’s some who feel they should be the face of meth, at least Twitter is showing that they at least have a sense of compassion. Which is weird because I usually get called a pedophile. Hey, this is 2019 for you, everyone is a pedophile or a boomer. OK boomer. Ah I’m rambling again.

"The mission of the campaign is to raise awareness – to get people talking about how they can be part of the solution and not just the problem," Noem told the Argus Leader Monday afternoon. "It is working."

South Dakota's meth crisis is "growing at an alarming rate" and affects every community in the state, Noem said in the campaign's public service announcement.

"This is our problem, and together, we need to get on it," Noem said.

Noem called the new campaign a "bold, innovative effort like the nation has never before seen."

In the coming weeks, South Dakotans will see the campaign in various media from TV to billboards to radio spots. The goal is to reach everyone in the state and educate them on signs of addiction, resources available to fight addiction and strategies to engage communities in recovery, Noem said.

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[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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You are now entering the spin cycle! And it lands on… no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy stop! Oh hey it’s another Clip Without Context!

Uh who are the enemies of humans, Pat, other humans? That’s about it really. Spin it again! it’s time for People Are Dumb! Hit it!

Of course you know by now that people are people and people are dumb. It’s been a while since we have done this feature. And there’s no shortage of idiots. I love this feature because I feel like you could take any one of these stories and interchange it with another story and you could create your own Mad Libs article based on it. “Florida Man Who Believes Earth Is Dumb Makes A Stupid Meth Rocket”. That might be a real headline, you don’t know! As Deadpool said, all great stories start with a gruesome murder, and what could be more gruesome than killing someone and then covering them with chili? I mean you got to feel bad for the chili in this case:

Jacob Stanton, 26, always claimed that he had been with victim Jacob Giarrusso the day of the murder, but had been dropped off at home and didn’t know who killed his friend.

The jury found that Stanton flew into a rage at Giarrusso’s grandmother’s house Nov, 18, 2017, in Salina, cracked his friend’s skull with a blunt object and then stabbed him numerous times, the kitchen knife blade breaking off in Giarrusso’s back.

Stanton then loaded his friend’s body into a car, along with other bloody items from the scene, and haphazardly threw grandmother’s chili -- which she left simmering in the kitchen -- across the bloody living room floor. He then drove the car to an apartment complex off Morgan Road and left it there.

It’s unclear why Stanton and Giarrusso, longtime friends who apparently did drugs together, ended up at odds.

Oh poor Kevin, all he wanted was for his coworkers to get to know each other in the pot. Next up we go to France. And yes cue Weird Al here but this one is a total head scratcher. Or maybe not – I mean what are the odds that a guy who is an expert on the brutal French dictator Napoleon would wind up emulating his hero? Let’s just hope that trend doesn’t continue!

A well-known Russian historian has confessed to murdering his lover - a former student - his lawyer says, after he was found in a river with a backpack containing a woman's arms.

Oleg Sokolov, 63, was drunk and fell into the river as he tried to dispose of body parts, local media said.

Police then found the decapitated body of Anastasia Yeshchenko, 24, at his home.

Prof Sokolov is a Napoleon expert who has received France's Légion d'Honneur.

"He has admitted his guilt," his lawyer Alexander Pochuyev told AFP, adding that he regretted what he had done and was now cooperating.

Prof Sokolov reportedly told police that he killed his lover during an argument and then sawed off her head, arms and legs.

Next up - fast food. OK people what is it about the Popeye’s chicken sandwich? It’s a fucking piece of breaded chicken on a bun with some sauce and some pickles. Anyone can make it. Well in Wisconsin there were people who did, and I get workplace tensions. Nobody understands it more than I do, but there’s no need to fight! Don’t lay down fisticuffs over crappy fast food!

Seven workers are out of a job after a brawl at a Popeyes was caught on camera.

"It was just out of control. That was the first thing that went through my head, like this is out of control,” Richard Fourté said.

A quick trip to Popeyes turned into anything but quick for Fourté on Wednesday night. Trying to avoid the long line at the drive-thru, Fourté went inside.

"I said to myself, ‘Wow, there's a lot of people working here,’" he said.

A lot of people soon turned into a lot of chaos.

"I heard one of them yell, ‘It's a fight!’ They ran to the back by the grills, okay. Now, there was a fight back there. I didn't get that one on tape,” Fourté said.

Next up – we go to the State of Florida. The Sunshine State. America’s most penis-shaped state. What are they up to this week? Well we go to the city of Port Charlotte. And this is yet another one of those instances where you give an idiot a gun, don’t be surprised if they do something stupid with it.

A woman was shot by a homeowner after breaking into a house on Strasburg Drive in Port Charlotte, according to deputies.

Jessica Gutzler, 40, broke into the home around 7 p.m. then started fighting the homeowner, Robert Lafata.

During the fight, Lafata said he shot Gutzler in her butt.

He said Gutzler used to date one of his female friends.

Gutzler then ran away, but later called 911 asking for medical assistance.

Deputies found her near Strasburg Drive and Seaton Avenue, then took her to a to Lee Memorial as a trauma alert.

She was treated, released and booked by the Lee County Sheriff's Office on the out-of-county warrant from Charlotte.

Ah thank you minions! Finally this week, don’t you think for a minute that I’m not going to get out of here without mentioning Fartgate. Yes, this is definitely People Are Dumb fodder especially when you consider all the conspiracy theories that have arisen from the 11 second clip. Let’s roll it first.

Yup, that appears to be a fart. And let’s face it no matter who you are, we can all appreciate a good fart joke! And I love that they had to say that it wasn’t them. He who smelt it dealt it!

There is so much that divides us. Science has somehow become partisan; truth itself is up for debate; America is split down the middle when it comes to deciding whether or not literally asking a foreign leader to interfere in an election is an impeachable offense.

But there is one thing we can all agree on: Farts are funny.

And on Monday night, Twitter users from every point on the political spectrum were delighted to find themselves engrossed in #fartgate.

During a live cross on MSNBC's Hardball, where host Chris Matthews was discussing the latest impeachment hearing developments with Rep. Eric Swalwell, a Democratic congressman and briefly a presidential candidate who made so little impact on the race that I typed his name as Tim even though I've been watching this video of him for the last 45 minutes.

As Swalwell was mid-sentence, there was a noise.

That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Keeping Up With The Candidates Ep. 15: Bloomberg WTF

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Let's spin the wheel one last time this week! Actually for the year since we only have 3 Top 10s left after this! And it lands on... Ph it's another clip without context!

No matter how many times I see that it's still funny. Spin it again! And hey it's time for Keeping Up With The Candidates!

Welcome back to our 2020 voters’ guide to the 2020 mother of all elections to end all elections that will decide the fate of the United States once and for all! Or maybe not. It will once again divide us and reassure that your creepy uncle voted for Trump again. In the last few weeks we’ve covered the 2019 election results which are very surprising, Georgia’s massive and terrifying voter purge, Beto O’Rourke’s controversial gun buyback program, and the Tulsi Gabbard SNAFU. This week – while the crowd in the candidates is thinning like the hair on your creepy uncle’s head, one guy has decided to throw his hat into the ring and that’s former New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg.

If Michael Bloomberg is looking for evidence that a late entrant can win a presidential nomination, all he has to do is look back. About seven decades.

It happened in 1952, when Illinois Gov. Adlai Stevenson—after repeatedly refusing President Harry Truman's requests to jump into the race as Truman's Democratic successor—waited until the convention began to declare himself a candidate. Stevenson gave an acclaimed welcoming speech to delegates in Chicago, changed his mind, and won the nomination on the third ballot.

Bloomberg's surprise late entry into the 2020 race is a familiar story: The candidate who casts himself in the role of The Savior Who Is Waiting in the Wings is a quadrennial feature of presidential campaigns. For decades, Democrats and Republicans alike have persisted in looking beyond the field of those desperate few who have spent months, if not years, racking up frequent flier miles; eating indigestible food; begging for money; and crowding into coffee shops, union halls and living rooms trying to build a constituency. Right around this time of the cycle, these voters and pundits and party operatives reliably hit the panic button, certain that somewhere above the fray stands a candidate free of the now-obvious flaws that burden the rest of the field. It’s a yearning that invites comparison to the Groucho Marx quip about refusing to join any club that would have him as a member: “I refuse to support any candidate who overtly is seeking my vote.”

There’s one pesky fact about these late-entry candidacies: They never succeed. Only once have they even materially affected the outcome of a fight for the nomination.

That is a good question sir. Apparently nobody does because they are too focused on winning the election, and no one cares about a new candidate this late in the game! Even the biggest contenders of the 2020 election – Warren, Biden, and Sanders are all scoffing at this incredibly lame and very poorly timed move.

Sen. Bernie Sanders, who was campaigning with one of his key surrogates — Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez — in Iowa, told supporters, “You’re not going to buy this election by spending hundreds of millions of dollars on media in California.”

Ocasio-Cortez later told reporters, “They’ve got class solidarity. The billionaires are looking out for each other. They’re willing to transcend difference and background and even politics.”

And Sanders echoed that sentiment, saying, “Jeff Bezos, worth $150 billion, supporting Mike Bloomberg, whose worth only $50 billion, that’s real class solidarity.”

Sen. Elizabeth Warren, who has called for taxing assets over $1 billion at 6 percent, also skewered Bloomberg following reports of the call, writing on Twitter, “One billionaire calls another billionaire and asks him to run for president—I’m shocked!” She also linked to a wealth calculator showing how much billionaires would pay under her proposed wealth tax (there’s a button where visitors can choose to be Bloomberg, among others).

Thank you! You and me both! And there’s no way anyone is going to touch California, my state is pretty much a solid lock on the democratic candidate and that’s probably why the GOP hates us so much. So with that in mind, let’s talk about why Bloomberg shouldn’t be president. What is it with billionaires being creepy sex perverts? Bloomberg is a sex pervert, Epstein was a sex pervert, Trump is a sex pervert, Steve Wynn is a sex pervert, I could go on and on.

Now that Michael Bloomberg has entered the Democratic presidential primary, it’s worth imagining the 2020 general election that could come to pass: the Republican who said into a hot mic that he liked to grab women “by the pussy” versus the Democrat-turned-Republican-turned-Democrat who reportedly admitted he’d said, of multiple female employees, “I’d do her.”

Read Bloomberg’s collected comments about women and you’ll marvel at how presidential they sound by the standards of the 45th president. Like Donald Trump, the former New York City mayor has made repeated remarks about the physical appearance and sexual desirability of women in his workplace. Like Trump, Bloomberg has allegedly complained about employees getting pregnant. Like Trump, he’s bragged about his sexual escapades and dismissed women who’ve accused him of harassment as money-grubbing liars.

The “I’d do her” admission comes from a deposition in a sexual harassment suit filed by Sekiko Sakai Garrison, one of four women who filed harassment or discrimination suits against Bloomberg LP, the company founded by the former mayor, in 1996 and 1997. Garrison alleged that, when she told Bloomberg she was pregnant, he replied, “Kill it!” and grumbled that she was the 16th pregnant employee at the company. She also said Bloomberg and other company leaders made unwanted sexual overtures and engaged in regular sexual commentary about the women they worked with. After Garrison got engaged, she said, Bloomberg asked her of her fiancé, “What, is he that good in bed, or did your father pay him off to get rid of you?”

Good question, I know I don’t! And here’s why it might be doomed from the start. Michael Bloomberg may have stepped in it big time, and like diving on a giant pile of coins Scrooge McDuck style, he doesn’t know how to test the waters before diving in head first. And it’s going to spell disaster. It will be more Peter Griffin than Scrooge McDuck.

Michael Bloomberg, the billionaire media mogul and former New York mayor, is preparing to join the 2020 Democratic presidential primary, The New York Times reported Thursday.

This comes eight months after the politically moderate, former Republican announced he would forgo a run for president in 2020.

Bloomberg wrote in a March 2019 op-ed that he'd rather spend the next 18 months working on issues like climate change and gun control than spend his time and money on a primary bid he said would be challenging.

"I've come to realize that I'm less interested in talking than doing," he wrote. "And I have concluded that, for now, the best way for me to help our country is by rolling up my sleeves and continuing to get work done."

Many Democrats believe Bloomberg's virtually unlimited campaign cash, loyal staffers, and philanthropic record would make him a formidable presidential candidate.

[font size="4"]Next Week:[/font]

We’re going to South Bend, Indiana where we’re going to hang with a surprising front runner of the campaign so far - Pete Buttigieg!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Alter Bridge[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, returning to the show, my next guest is an awesome band out of Orlando, their latest album is called “Walk The Sky”. You can see them on tour this February. Playing their song “Pay No Mind”, give it up for Alter Bridge!

Thank you UC Berkeley! This was fun! We are off next week, we’ll be running a best of which will have our much talked about but will finally be seen Pt. 2 of our What’s Up With Texas docuseries plus we’re announcing our tour dates for season 8! We’re back on 12/4 with a new edition live from Stanford University! See you in two weeks! Happy Thanksgiving!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: UC Berkeley Student Commons, Berkeley, CA
Special Thanks To: UC Berkeley
Holy Shit Gospel Choir: Redemption Church Band, Berkeley CA
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Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

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