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I hope Trump gives us all the funeral we really want (Original Post) jberryhill Mar 2019 OP
I was just going say the same thing! imanamerican63 Mar 2019 #1
Sure, in 2040 in some Supermax's potter's field. RockRaven Mar 2019 #2
He's already 74. Initech Mar 2019 #5
Agreed, I hope its not until well after the 2020 elections where he cstanleytech Mar 2019 #18
I have sparkling wine chilling! 50 Shades Of Blue Mar 2019 #3
Yes and in a jiffy..............please. nt UniteFightBack Mar 2019 #4
Don't think I've ever seen a gold-plated coffin.... lindysalsagal Mar 2019 #6
This fucker is obsessed with TV ratings. TRUST ME - the ratings for this goblin's funeral will bullwinkle428 Mar 2019 #7
His corpse can be fed to starving polar bears. Kaleva Mar 2019 #8
What you got against polar bears? rickyhall Mar 2019 #12
Oh, they'll be fine. Their usual diet includes a very thick layer of blubber. Maru Kitteh Mar 2019 #36
Yes, please. Solly Mack Mar 2019 #9
Would it be in bad taste to say Dem2theMax Mar 2019 #10
oh yeah ifihad2 Mar 2019 #11
I'm still hoping for a stroke... rickyhall Mar 2019 #13
He'll put the FUN back in funeral. milestogo Mar 2019 #14
His own? MarianJack Mar 2019 #15
Well, one thing's for sure... catbyte Mar 2019 #16
I dreamed how he died Ponietz Mar 2019 #17
I wonder if he'll choose cremation dflprincess Mar 2019 #19
i'll bring the big Macs Takket Mar 2019 #20
HA! mahina Mar 2019 #21
Complete with the Bone Spur Pipers (Scottish bagpipe band) ProudLib72 Mar 2019 #22
planning to pour a diet coke on his grave Marthe48 Mar 2019 #23
I wouldn't be surprised if it happens soon ZeroSomeBrains Mar 2019 #24
If it is a Trump funeral, it will be what we really want. smirkymonkey Mar 2019 #25
It will be a totally secret burial or cremation. Way, way too many folks want to piss on his grave.. machoneman Mar 2019 #27
We can just piss on all the properties left with the "Trump" name on them. smirkymonkey Mar 2019 #30
Can't wait Generic Other Mar 2019 #26
Nice! Didn't see your post before I jumped in above! machoneman Mar 2019 #28
I love it gopiscrap Mar 2019 #31
There would be a lot of dancing on the grave. democratisphere Mar 2019 #29
A news report of the event: The Velveteen Ocelot Mar 2019 #32
Awesome treestar Mar 2019 #37
Yes Kitchari Mar 2019 #38
Nah. I don't want him to get off that easy. shanny Mar 2019 #33
He seens to be wofking hard on the first part. CentralMass Mar 2019 #34
Here here. Maru Kitteh Mar 2019 #35
a gas station in Milan Italy? DBoon Mar 2019 #39
REgular or super. Historic NY Mar 2019 #40
ask the ghost of Mussolini DBoon Mar 2019 #42
Funeral we all want Peace06 Mar 2019 #41


(15,337 posts)
2. Sure, in 2040 in some Supermax's potter's field.
Wed Mar 20, 2019, 08:13 PM
Mar 2019

Anywhere else, and if at that location any sooner, would be disappointing.


(100,440 posts)
5. He's already 74.
Wed Mar 20, 2019, 08:52 PM
Mar 2019

With his toxic diet of Big Macs, Diet Cokes, and Filet O'Fishes, no way he's making it to 90. No way.


(26,501 posts)
18. Agreed, I hope its not until well after the 2020 elections where he
Wed Mar 20, 2019, 09:53 PM
Mar 2019

will hopefully be kicked out office and then charged along with his numerous co conspirators *glances over at Nunes and McConnell*.


(20,634 posts)
7. This fucker is obsessed with TV ratings. TRUST ME - the ratings for this goblin's funeral will
Wed Mar 20, 2019, 08:56 PM
Mar 2019

be absolutely OFF THE CHARTS.

Maru Kitteh

(28,377 posts)
36. Oh, they'll be fine. Their usual diet includes a very thick layer of blubber.
Wed Mar 20, 2019, 11:06 PM
Mar 2019

Seals have a lot of fat, too.


(638 posts)
24. I wouldn't be surprised if it happens soon
Wed Mar 20, 2019, 10:35 PM
Mar 2019

I don't think he is going to be make it through his first term. The way he eats. How he never exercises. How he speaks. I think that he is not well mentally and physically. All it takes is a fall or a stroke or a heart attack.


(4,056 posts)
27. It will be a totally secret burial or cremation. Way, way too many folks want to piss on his grave..
Wed Mar 20, 2019, 10:44 PM
Mar 2019

or worse!



(63,221 posts)
30. We can just piss on all the properties left with the "Trump" name on them.
Wed Mar 20, 2019, 10:46 PM
Mar 2019

He will NEVER rest in peace.

The Velveteen Ocelot

(116,691 posts)
32. A news report of the event:
Wed Mar 20, 2019, 10:50 PM
Mar 2019

On a cold December day in Queens, a small group of people gathered in a shabby 50s-era funeral parlor to pay their last respects to a man who was once the so-called leader of the free world – Donald J. Trump. Presidents and ex-presidents are entitled to state funerals, but after Mr. Trump choked to death on a piece of overdone steak in his cell at the federal prison in Otisville, New York last week, his few remaining allies and supporters encountered many obstacles when trying to arrange for such an event. The National Cathedral in Washington, D.C., where services for many former presidents have been held, was unavailable; a representative of the church explained that the Archbishop had “serious theological concerns,” and expressed a strong desire that the funeral should be held at “an appropriate secular location.” Mar-a-Lago, which was once Mr. Trump’s Florida resort and residence, was also unavailable because it was taken in an asset-forfeiture along with most of the rest of his assets following his impeachment and criminal trials. Family members were unable to assist with final arrangements, since of his four adult children only daughter Tiffany remains unscathed and unincarcerated, and she suggested that “they should just double-bag him and put him out on the curb for next week’s trash pickup.” Ex-wife Melania and son Barron have sought asylum in Melania’s homeland, Slovenia, and could not be reached for comment.

The brief ceremony included a eulogy by Roger Stone, delivered via Skype from an undisclosed location in Argentina, and a brief homily by Franklin Graham in which he compared Mr. Trump to Jesus Christ and warned that he would rise again from the dead to judge and punish his persecutors. A bystander, later identified as Michael Cohen, commented loudly that it although it has been three days Mr. Trump remains dead, Mr. Graham appeared not to have heard the remark. When asked why he was attending the funeral, Mr. Cohen, who was recently released from prison upon completing his sentence for election finance offenses, replied that he “wanted to be sure the fucker was really dead.” Others at the sparsely-attended event included former New York Mayor and Mr. Trump’s television lawyer Rudy Giuliani, Fox host Sean Hannity, former vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin, and former Senator Lindsey Graham, who was observed sobbing quietly on the shoulder of washed-up rocker Ted Nugent.

No presidents or vice-presidents, former or current, were in attendance. President Harris was in Brussels, Belgium at a NATO conference, and Vice-President Buttigieg was opening a new federal center in El Paso, Texas, to welcome refugees from Central America. Former President Obama was entertaining children at a holiday party at a D.C. hospital, and 100-year-old former President Jimmy Carter was busy nailing shingles to a Habitat for Humanity house in Georgia. Former President Bill Clinton and former Secretary of State and presidential candidate Hillary Clinton had just left for Africa to open three new AIDS clinics on behalf of the Clinton Foundation. Former President George W. Bush, reached at his home in Dallas, remarked that he’d “rather eat a bag o’ bees” than attend the funeral, and provided a photo of a recent painting he had done of Mr. Trump, which unfortunately is not suitable for publication in a family newspaper. Mr. Trump's vice-president, Mike Pence, was also unable to attend; prison officials declined to give him a day pass for the ceremony.

Pallbearers included Corey Lewandowski, former Congressman Devin Nunes, who appeared to be wearing an ankle monitor, and four unidentified men in red MAGA caps. It was later determined that the men had been hired through a Craigslist advertisement; each was paid $50 in cash. Mr. Trump’s final resting place has not been determined; most cemeteries approached about a location declined, citing concerns for the surrounding turf grass.


(22,525 posts)
42. ask the ghost of Mussolini
Thu Mar 21, 2019, 12:35 PM
Mar 2019

Partisans hung his corpse at an ESSO station in Milan at the end of WWII

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