Americans Relieved to Learn That Trump [Most] of Time Not Using Powers as President (Borowitz)

[Stonepounder]

https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/americans-relieved-to-learn-that-trump-spends-sixty-per-cent-of-time-not-using-powers-as-president?utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_020419&utm_medium=email&bxid=5bd672883f92a41245dd6fd1&user_id=27161810&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz



Americans Relieved to Learn That Trump Spends Sixty Per Cent of Time Not Using Powers as President

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—A leak of Donald J. Trump’s official White House schedule has left millions of Americans deeply relieved that Trump spends approximately sixty per cent of each day not using his powers as President. In conversations across the country, Americans called the revelation that Trump devotes the majority of his day to “executive time,” a euphemism for watching TV and checking Twitter, the most reassuring news out of the White House in months.

“Like most of the people I know, the idea of Donald Trump sitting behind his desk doing things that affect the country has me in a state of mortal terror,” Carol Foyler, a resident of Minneapolis, said. “Just knowing that he’s spending sixty per cent of his time doing basically nothing makes me feel somewhat better.”

Harland Dorrinson, who lives in Detroit, agreed that it was “great news that Trump is only President forty per cent of the time” but called on the entertainment industry to create more diverting programming that might distract Trump for a larger portion of his day. “It would be fantastic if we could push the sixty per cent of his day that he does nothing up to seventy or even eighty per cent,” he said. “Maybe someone could come up with a podcast that he could get into.”

But Tracy Klugian, a Baltimore resident, said that the leak of Trump’s schedule did little to allay her darkest fears. “Until I find out that he’s spending a hundred per cent of his time not being President, I won’t sleep at night,” she said.

[SWBTATTReg]

1. Why the surprise? rump has constantly shown that he's ignored issues, misstated facts right...

and left, and pretty well just spends his time tweeting instead of doing his job. Worthless and lazy. No wonder he's had so many bankruptcies...he basically caused them all due to his non existent work ethic.

[Gothmog]

2. I love good satire

[jcgoldie]

3. This was pretty much my honest response to this "executive time" leak

The less time that jackoff spends actually trying to do anything productive the better for America.