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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsTrump Considering Firing Dow Jones Industrial Average
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)After watching it suffer its worst losses since he became President, Donald Trump is seriously considering firing the Dow Jones industrial Average, aides have confirmed.
According to the aides, Trump is furious at the D.J.I.A. for going down so precipitously and believes that it has treated him very unfairly.
Increasingly, the President has become convinced that the Dow Jones Industrial Average is not on his team, one aide said. Seeing the negative Dow numbers in the corner of the TV screen has been wrecking eleven hours of every day for him.
Reportedly, Trump is mulling replacing the Dow with a new system, in which Sarah Huckabee Sanders would appear every day at 4 p.m. to announce how high stocks had skyrocketed.
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-considering-firing-dow-jones-industrial-average/amp
Gothmog
(146,202 posts)orangecrush
(19,695 posts)Mira
(22,382 posts)would target Hillary second, Obama first.
The tweeter in chief has not yet made a comment. Choked on his hamburger maybe.
This is taking the wind out of his most self congratulatory sail with a vengeance.
He has nothing left to brag about, even in his own mind.
orangecrush
(19,695 posts)this should be entertaining!
moondust
(20,042 posts)Sad.
orangecrush
(19,695 posts)for the narcissistic rage!
grantcart
(53,061 posts)which will reflect only those businesses which will always align with his policies: Wall building, gun manufacturing, weird hair products, etc.
Gothmog
(146,202 posts)Stuart G
(38,477 posts)orangecrush
(19,695 posts)Kick in to the DU tip jar?
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