Barack Obama, Hostage Negotiator - a play in one scene.

[Pale Blue Dot]

Barack Obama approaches the hostage scene.

B.O.: Sergeant, what's going on here?

Sergeant: A group of Republicans are holding the American people hostage.

B.O. What are their demands?

Sergeant: They want $2.4 trillion dollars and they want to kill the hostages.

B.O. Ok - I got this. (grabs megaphone). Republicans! I agree that you should have $2.4 trillion. Just release the hostages and let me get some of that money from my rich friends.

Sergeant: Wait, what?

Republicans: NO! The rich have sacrificed enough! Take it from your poor friends and then let us kill the hostages!

B.O.: Please - let's be reasonable and compromise. How about I get the money from my poor friends and you release the hostages?

Republicans: If you give us the money and let us keep the hostages, you have a deal.

B.O.: You drive a hard bargain, but I can accept that. (to Sergeant) Well, it's not perfect, but I think we can claim victory here.

Sergeant: But we got nothing!

B.O. They didn't kill the hostages. Remember, our nation was built on compromise.

[midnight]

1. Sadly many believe that last response...

[DFab420]

2. Here's that same discussion if it was done the way so many here would want it.

B.O : Sarge, What's the SitRep?

Sarge: Group of Republicans holding hostages

B.O: Demands?

Sarge: They want $2.4 trillion dollars and they want to kill the hostages.

B.O: Ok - I got this. (grabs megaphone). Republicans! GO FUCK YOURSELVES I'M STICKING TO MY PERFECT IDEALS.

Sarge: Wait WHAT?

Republicans: Ok. BLAM!!!

B.O: Well the hostages are dead but at least I can look my progressive friends in the eyes, because as progressives we care about our ideals more then making sure our country doesn't default. But hey I can claim victory here.....


End scene.

[joeybee12]

5. Lame...incredibly lame...nt

[DFab420]

6. as if the OP wasn't lame to begin with.......

[KittyWampus]

9. But entirely true. In fact, more accurate than the OP.

[SidDithers]

7. Awesome...

well done.

:thumbsup:

Sid

[Wait Wut]

10. Too accurate.

The sad part is, "End scene".

It should just be the end of the first act. The next act (in either scenario) should be Dems/Libs/Progs joining together to fight the Rs/Cons/teapers. Funny how nothing changes, here. Kinda odd how the only ones that keep trying to get that message across are shot down.

[quinnox]

3. Obam's poker strategy - before the hand is dealt, he folds his hand

As the famous political cartoon depicted.

[CJCRANE]

4. The whole situation reminds me of the scene in Fight Club...

where the main character (played by Ed Norton) is called into his manager's office.

Ed Norton proceeds to literally beat himself up, all the while screaming and shouting that the manager is attacking him.

In the end the manager is forced to give the Ed Norton character a big payoff just to leave him alone.

[SidDithers]

8. Lame...incredibly lame...nt

Sid

[Wait Wut]

12. LOL!!!

I see what you did thar...

;-)

[Brickbat]

11. .