As president, I will BAN all unnecessary travel.

[Philosoraptor]

If elected or selected, I promise to never leave the White House, except for the standard two week vacation once a year. Why should I? Everything one needs to run the United States of America is right there in the White House. Why should I travel around the globe like bush, giving the same speech over and over again, it's an incredible waste of fuel and resources.

Think what it must cost to fuel up Air Force One, and the chopper going to Air Force One, round trip. Think of the payrolls of the pilots, SS officers, escort planes and their fuel, traffic tie ups, etc., for just one cheap photo op stunt? All business could be conducted from the safety and luxury of our White House, which is equipped I'm sure with the latest state of the art communications equipment, telephones, faxes, internets, blackberries and other high tech talk gadgetry.

I would occupy only a small space in the White House for me and my family, rent free, all expenses paid, and will lead a modest lifestyle for four years at whatever the current minimum wage is.

There will be no inaugural ball or any other ridiculously expensive high society affairs, no parties, unless they are to raise money for charities, no extravagance or opulence of any kind other than the already obvious.

The expense of flying all over the world just to shake hands and look busy is obscenely excessive and the people should be highly offended to see their tax money wasted in this way. If we calculated how much just one year of all this flying around costs I'll bet it's enough to build lots of schools, make lots of improvements, and feed lots of less fortunate folks.

Next: Death to all lobbyists!

[damntexdem]

1. But as president, I will ...

ban all unnecessary banning.

[Philosoraptor]

3. I will also ban unnecessary wars & unnecessary stupidity & redundancy.

[dogday]

2. As President, I would ban toilet paper

let them use corn cobs would be my motto.....

[Philosoraptor]

4. BAN ROLL ON!

Corn cobs were good enough for our fore fathers and our fore mothers.

[dogday]

6. I hear it's a feeling you never forget

:rofl: :rofl:

[ccpup]

5. and because of my refusal

to travel and get the necessary face time with other World Leaders, the reputation of my Country will suffer as I grow more and more remote from those whose aid I may need at some point. To all the Leaders of their Respective Countries, I'll immaturely flip them the proverbial bird and stomp my foot 'cause I'm a President of the People who refuses to break bread with the Elite, even if they are my compadres at the Banquet of World Leadership and continued good relations with them can be useful to everyone.

And I won't allow anyone -- especially those who gave everything for my campaign and to help my dream of becoming President come true -- one special night of celebration. They won't bring out their best clothes -- after living in sweat suits or jeans in my campaign office for months on end --, eat delicious food and they will not, absolutely will not, be allowed to celebrate our victory ... unless it's for charity. And we all know how fun the Help the Children speeches are in the middle of a celebration, don't we? And it's even more fun to donate to the party you're going to to celebrate your achievement.

I will also leave much of the White House unoccupied -- although that empty space will still be heated through central heating and air-conditioned through central air -- because I want to make an important statement about how much of a Regular Guy (or Gal) I am. To hell with those children who want to look up to me as a paragon of success and dream, for themselves, that one day they too can live in a large house (rather than the one room they now share with their 8 brothers and sisters) while still being a good person who does good work. Better they learn from their President that to have any signs of success is something to be ashamed of. Better they cram their family into a few small rooms so they can make an important statement about ... something.

And those whose job it is to assist me in my work -- the SS, the pilots, the attendants and assistants and all the other fancy jobs that really aren't necessary? --, well, I think I'll just fire them and open my own mail (all those thousands of letters that flood the White House weekly), fly coach coast-to-coast (losing the hours one could use for work or high level meetings due to the prying eyes and ears of your fellow coachmates), drive my own car (and be a sitting duck for anyone with a sinister agenda) and live like everyone else even though millions of people are depending on my continued health and safety so THEIR lives can get better.

No, I'd rather stick my petulant finger in the eye of those who trusted me enough to vote for me and make my life -- and job -- much more difficult than it could ever need to be. Because I want to make a very important statement about ... well, something. But it's important.

[Philosoraptor]

7. I like it, when are you announcing?

[ccpup]

9. LOL

have to decide if it's a job worth having and then find a person who'd wanna travel that road with me. on second thought, I'm as happy as a pig in sh*t with what I have now, so ... you can be President and I'll just be me.

[Hardrada]

8. Food from garden patch

Cloth diapers rule in force. Library books to read only.