TEA BAGGER OLYMPICS? What kind of events should be at a TB Olympics?

[AnArmyVeteran]

What kind of competitions should be held at a Tea Bagger Olympics? I thought of the following competitions, but I would like to see your ideas.

- Most extreme racist contest...

- Most misssppeellledd words on a sign contest...

- Most government services being used by a tea bagger contest... (ie, biggest TB hypocrite contest)

- Most guns contest...

- Etc... (What would you like to see?)

Fox News would, of course, have the television rights to cover all the events at a TB olympics.

[GreenPartyVoter]

1. Contest to see who can yell "Noooooooo!!!" the loudest and longest. Bonus points for

building up a froth around the mouth while doing so.

[Turbineguy]

2. Lawn chair sitting.

Teabagging for Jesus.

Picking porta-potties.

[Arkana]

3. Who can tongue Sean Hannity's balls the longest?

A Sarah Palin wankfest?

[KonaKane]

4. This guy's got a good idea (photo)

He looks the part too. Great form.

[AnArmyVeteran]

16. Toilet Seat Horseshoe contest! I love it!!! Hilarious picture!

[angrycarpenter]

5. I don't know but they all warm-up with truth stretches. nt

[Xipe Totec]

6. The Jerk and Drool (nt)

[BuelahWitch]

7. Dodging potholes in a beater car would make a great Teabag Olympic sport

Of course I do that every day, and I'm not a teabagger! :evilgrin:

[Webster Green]

8. Well, actual teabagging for sure.

Oh wait, you asked what would I like to see.

Nevermind! :puke:

[foxfeet]

9. Synchronized stupidity.

[indy legend]

56. lol +1

[ChairmanAgnostic]

10. Watching Paint Dry, while loading a shotgun.

Should any paint bubble occur spontaneously, the first to shoot it accurately with 12 gauge lead shot, wins. If none occurs, well, the contest continues.

[SoCalDem]

11. republican water carrying..n/t

[mrcheerful]

12. What about sign design competition where grammar and spelling count

[charlyvi]

13. The Hood and Sheet Iron-off. n/t

[pipi_k]

14. Blueberry pie and booger eating contest combined with

the Moose-kissing/Synchronized Whining/Cowpie Flinging Triathlon

[AnArmyVeteran]

30. Awesome! 3 More: Bobbing for boogers, Loading ammo, Breaking down a gun, cleaning & reassembling it.

Reloading ammunition contest...

Breaking down a gun, cleaning it & reassembling it contest...

Bobbing for boogers contest... *sure to be a crowd pleaser*

[Walk away]

15. How about the whitest hood competition?

Most guns and ammo in the basement?

Sean Hannity look alike contest?

Spitting on U.S. Senators?

[AnArmyVeteran]

17. LOLOL... I'd have plastic surgery if I looked like Hannity. I'd vomit on every mirror.

[Walk away]

23. You have to THINK like Hannity in order to LOOK like Hannity. nt

[Bluebear]

18. Spelling bee. The one who lasts the longest without getting one right wins gold

[Union Yes]

19. Who can sway like a drone the longest. nt

[Union Yes]

20. King of the Capitalist Hill.

[The Wielding Truth]

21. Who can ignore the truth and lie the loudest.

[The Wielding Truth]

22. Who is most outraged by being called a racist while carrying the confederate

flag.

[Walk away]

25. ...and whistling Dixie! nt

[The Wielding Truth]

28. Extra points.

[TheCowsCameHome]

24. Bagger Spelling Bee - who can spell the most words incorrectly..

..and not know it.

[AnArmyVeteran]

39. But they ALL might end up to be Olympic Champions in this event...

[TheCowsCameHome]

26. Which Bagger's head fit their pointy hood best without modification

[TheCowsCameHome]

27. Or which goober draws from the most Gummint assistance programs.

[sensate2000]

29. Best tinfoil hat?

Confederate flag making contest

Census taker target shoot

Lynch mob noose tying speed race

[AnArmyVeteran]

31. Most right wing bumper stickers on a pickup truck contest?

[Lost-in-FL]

32. Smell that Tea Bag

Identify correctly Rush's, Beck's, Hannity's or McCain's balls by sniffing them.

[AnArmyVeteran]

60. What's sad is they could tell them apart... They are 'tea baggers' after all...

[JanMichael]

33. Filling out SS forms 101 (entitlements 101). Fiber 202. (pooping). Prunes 403 (pooping faster).

Constipation 709. Who can shit faster with impediments.

Medicare Exploitation 482. Who gets an appointment sooner with competition.

Senior Discounts at Anystore 265. (who demands the highest level of bullshit discounts per hour at fast food places to make them fatter)

Trying to tie shoes while standing up straight! Literally impossible for most of them.

Better yet seeing your dick while standing up (Ie. their big fat shit-filled gut is usually in the way). I bet you 95% can't! Better better yet seeing your woman stuff while sucking your gut in - maybe 76%.

[Union Yes]

34. Who can dangle the most Teabags into their mouths at once.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

35. Speed-dating family reunion.

[AnArmyVeteran]

47. I guess a side contest to yours could be 'How many 1st cousins have you slept with'...

[harry_pothead]

36. Don't forget teabagging

[AnArmyVeteran]

49. Great picture though... But he must be a right winger cause he's facing the wrong way (dumbass!!!)

[Swamp Rat]

37. Monster truck n' tractor pull, with unlimited free hot dogs and beer, and free firecrackers.

Sparklers for the kids. :)

[HopeHoops]

38. The 20 yard mosey.

[mitchum]

40. Taking it on the chin

[AnArmyVeteran]

48. Buzzword Counting Contest, and three more...

Most Non-stop Fox News Watching Contest...

Chewing Tobacco Spitting Contest...

Longest Non-stop Listening to Right Wing Radio Contest...

[lame54]

41. Most lies in a single paragraph

[indy legend]

55. Duh, What's a pair-a-graf

[Junkie Brewster]

42. What about the hypocrisy high jump?

Think about it: The teabagger with the worst case of hypocrisy, the biggest blind spot to their own use of public works/funds, wins. Contestants should be people who collect Social Security and who use Medicare and who attend a protest in a public park in order to enter. Additional points could be given for greater hypocrisy- for instance, someone could get hypocrite points for using the VA while opposing government healthcare. Additional points could be earned by the most hypocritical sign ("Keep the Government out of my Medicare!").

[rationalcalgarian]

43. Python's "Upperclass Twit of the Year"

There are some good competitions for the teabaggers! I especially like the last one...... hmmmm

[Initech]

44. Protest sign pole vault

[AnArmyVeteran]

45. That might conflict with the biggest beer gut contest... but GREAT IDEA!

[LeftishBrit]

46. Running Amok? Jumping to Conclusions? Setting the Bar Low?

[lutefisk]

50. IQ Tests . . . n/t

[AnArmyVeteran]

Ok, you got me with that damned bug! It looked do real. Thanx for the smile...

[AnArmyVeteran]

51. Ok, you got me with that damned bug! It looked do real. Thanx for the smile...

[Incitatus]

52. 9mm Russian Roulette

[Still Sensible]

53. Circular Firing Squad or Grenade Dodgeball? n/t

[Stevenmarc]

54. The Cognitive Dissonance Hurdles

Watch as contestants leap over all logic put in front of them

[Richard Steele]

57. And the 100-yard Logical Disconnect. nm

[Richard Steele]

58. Government check cashing, spittle-flecked invective hurling, and syncronized asshattery. nm

[AnArmyVeteran]

59. Asshattery? Thanks! I just learned a new word today!