Do you use terms like "retard" (non) or "retarded" (adjective) derogatorily?

[CTyankee]

I know, I know. Those are "loaded" words and you probably don't.

But, I have noticed that far too many people do. And some of these people I KNOW would not use the "N" word for African Americans or the "C" word for women.

So what gives with "retard" and "retarded"? Why do we hear it so often in regular conversation?

It is the prevalent use of these two words that disturbs me in this whole Special Olympics dust up. A few years back I worked as a fundraiser for an organization that assisted people with disabilities and became aware of my ignorance about how marginalized these people were in our society, even as we have made such progress in "mainstreaming" into schools and some workplaces. Group homes for people with retardation are not welcome in many neighborhoods and when they are there, the group home residents are regarded with suspicion or at least discomfort by the neighbors.

I believe that President Obama's casual comparison of his low bowling score with Special Olympics was regrettable but not totally surprising. It is to his credit that he realized what he had said and immediately called Tim Shriver, the head of SO, to apologize. He took responsibility. He will probably never make that mistake again. ANd I think we ALL can take a lesson from it, too.

But it is just too easy to fall into usage that we hear around us often that casts something to do with a person with disabilities as a detrimental term for a person we think is less worthy and more stupid than ourselves.

Let's knock it off, folks.

[wndycty]

1. And it should be noted President Obama did not use either word

:kick:

[WI_DEM]

7. Exactly, if he had used such words then there should be real outrage

[CTyankee]

29. Also should be noted I never said that either.

My point was that acceptance of those words in casual conversation can, not necessarily must, but can make us more accepting of the Special Olympics reference.

[Iggo]

2. Yes, I do.

Less and less often the older I get. Raising kids helps.

But I ain't perfect.

[wryter2000]

3. No, I don't

And as the other respondent noted, neither did President Obama

[depakid]

4. There are more apt and more penetrating words to express the sentiment

as it arises.

I confess to liking "moran" though- when it fits.

[ogneopasno]

5. I try to call people on it whenever they use it, both here and IRL. There's no need to use those

terms and I hate that there seems to be a resurgence in their use.

I hope this incident makes people think twice about using those words. I find them hateful and offensive, and the fact that that view is brushed off as hypersensitive, uber-PC, out-of-proportion-when-people-have-been-tortured is insulting.

[peace13]

6. 999 more post like this and I think the point will be made. Thanks.

People aren't perfect so you may as well get used to it.

[CTyankee]

30. Perfect? Nope, not my goal. A little humility among those of us who are

"termporarily abled" might be a good thing, tho.

[uppityperson]

54. Of course people aren't perfect, but having it pointed out that you are using offensive term and

saying "oh, it's not offensive why are you offended" is wrong. So is letting it pass since "people aren't perfect so you may as well get used to it". Do you call women cunts and people of color n*s?

[peace13]

73. Your comment is very rude and does not deserve a response but I will say..

I have a friend with special needs that works harder than all of us put together. But every once in a while I may call something retarded. It is a mistake and not a nice thing. I apologize as Obama did. What more can we do but try to be better people. As I say people aren't perfect. Like your rudeness, do you work on that?

[graywarrior]

8. In some places, it's a localism

Like in MA. I used to work in the disabled field, so the use of retard was offensive to me and I called people on it. But hell, in my own family I call my brother a retard coz that's what I've done since we were kids. Now tho, I use Bushtard but I guess even that could offend some people.

[Gormy Cuss]

36. It is a regionalism in New England.

It just means goofy. That said, I don't use it in public now and when I was a kid it was grounds for a spanking if my mother ever heard us say it.

[graywarrior]

38. It's spelled different in NE

R'tah'd

[Gormy Cuss]

39. Yep.

[graywarrior]

41. We're so proud

[tigereye]

9. no, because I have often worked with folks with special needs

it's a very uncool phrase to use, pretty insensitive.

[Peacetrain]

10. I can say with 100% certainty I have NEVER seen that word used derogatorily here

or did the President use it.

So who do we tell to knock it off in here?

I will be the first in line to rip them a new one..

[TahitiNut]

17. Does "fucktard" count?

:shrug: I've seen "-tard' neologisms quite frequently on DU.

[Peacetrain]

24. That does count in my book..

Granted I do not read every thread, nor do I read every post in a thread by a long shot, and it should be pointed out to people.

Words count

[CTyankee]

32. It's interesting. I never really thought about it that way. It shows my own

lack of consciousness about the impact that word could have...

[Taverner]

37. Change 1 letter (the a to a u) and its all good

[Freddie Stubbs]

26. 1,830 uses of the term 'freeptard' on DU:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/searchresults.html?q=freeptard&sitesearch=democraticunderground.com&sa=Search&domains=democraticunderground.com&client=pub-7805397860504090&forid=1&ie=ISO-8859-1&oe=ISO-8859-1&cof=GALT%3A%23008000%3BGL%3A1%3BDIV%3A%23336699%3BVLC%3A663399%3BAH%3Acenter%3BBGC%3AFFFFFF%3BLBGC%3A336699%3BALC%3A0000FF%3BLC%3A0000FF%3BT%3A000000%3BGFNT%3A0000FF%3BGIMP%3A0000FF%3BFORID%3A11&hl=en

[Name removed]

56. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[arcadian]

11. Most people in this country would probably just pass it over.

I think the audience laughed. Good publicity for the Special Olympics though.

[muffin1]

12. I confess...

I do use it from time to time to describe anyone from Palin to Hannity. I'm glad you've called me on it, though. It really is a despicable habit. :blush:
I hearby promise to do better.

[madinmaryland]

13. There are a few posters over in the Sports Forum that love to throw

that word around.

[Lost in CT]

68. Red Sox Fans? nt

[RaleighNCDUer]

14. I only use it as a descriptive, as in referencing my developmentally

disabled daughter - not as a pejorative, as in referencing some of my red-state co-workers.

[Betsy Ross]

15. The aglomeration of your dexterity tends to instigate me

to confidently postulate that there is no substantial evidence of any potentiality.

Wrote that silliness in Junior High School when the term "spaz" was popular. But I never use that or retard.

[Obamanaut]

16. "...people with retardation ;;;" Is your asterisk * key broken? Can

one still use variations of the root word, or is that forbidden also?

[CTyankee]

35. When I worked for the center that provided for people with disabilities,

the words "the mentally retarded" was considered offensive. They are people first, hence the designation of "people with retardation" not "retarded people".

Here's the explanation: people should not be first and foremost described by what they cannot do. For instance, I am a math-challenged person and I freely admit that I am. However, I don't think I would like to go through my life with the term math-challenged always as a description of who I was. Get it?

[Obamanaut]

45. Yeah, I "get it." I am also aware of terms such as educable mentally

handicapped (EMH), trainable mentally handicapped (TMH), special needs, etc.

Too many people get their panties in a wad about too many things, and then along comes the false (aka faux for people offended by the perfectly good word false) outrage.

Perhaps I'm just "sensitve challenged."

[CTyankee]

50. Please. I was just telling you what I learned from people who themselves

have to listen to that terminology as a descriptor of who they are. It had an impact on me. I had never considered how they might feel before. So I changed my perspective...:shrug:

[Obamanaut]

57. OK. I apologize for my tone. At one time I worked with what used

to be called in my small town ARC - Association for Retarded Citizens. This was in the early 90's, and the name has since changed. Some days I took a whole van full of clients and we'd go to rest areas along the interstate and pick up sticks, trash, etc. (The association had a contract to clean/maintain five rest areas.)

More recently I was a special ed teacher aide in a prison education department. You might be amazed at terminology deemed offensive in a prison atmosphere, but also amazed at how some of the young people who need more assistance than others are watched over by other inmates. Even there one can see prey, predators, and protectors.

At still another time I was a volunteer in a classroom of 5th and 6th graders already identified as probable dropouts - a whole classroom of various emotional and educational "issues."

In all the above instances there were some (including parents) who were extremely sensitive, others not so much.

[Believing Is Art]

18. It slips sometimes

I shouldn't, but, it happens. I heard it a lot as a kid and had incorporated it as an insult along with "moron," "stupid," and other such terms before I knew it was offensive to people with special needs. I managed to undo "gay" as an insult (I didn't even know what hetero- and homosexual meant by the time that was being used by kids my age), I should be able to undo this.

I also use it in some reports in a very literal sense. Like, "an adverse pressure gradient retarded the flow." I don't think that counts as derogatory, though.

[ORDagnabbit]

19. I like retardo

[Fovea]

20. I am disabled

Specifically from a stroke.
If Pres Obama had said "brain-damaged" or "spastic" instead, it might have stung for a minute, but here is what my perspective tells me.

The disabled, the mentally challenged, the illiterate live in a constant state of insult from the world around us. We are so frequently talked around and given proof
of our actual lack of value- and frequently live in such isolation-- that when someone like the president of the united states speaks about us at all, even if it is an
absent minded self deprecation in slur's clothing, it is a bit surprising.

I would rather take as an example his response the the guy in the chair during his Q&A period.

Pres. Obama is getting slammed because of our collective guilt.
People who think otherwise are stupid, and I don't say that to insult stupid people.

Of course, the difference between the stupid and the actual disabled is that the stupid
do not actually think you mean them.

[Obamanaut]

27. I like your answer. Miz O "has issues" (as she likes to say) due to

blunt force trauma from a motorscooter accident three years ago. She is not sensitive, but knows that she is not quite the same as pre-accident. We were told that what we see is what is normally consistent with the after-effects of a stroke. On the plus side, I was told in the hospital three years ago that we were close to not even discussing prognosis.

Re your last line, I actually heard her tell a relative who was "talking down" to her "I'm not stupid, you know."

[nomorenomore08]

72. " Pres. Obama is getting slammed because of our collective guilt."

I think that's the best take on the subject I've seen, which is why I'm now commenting on an issue I'd studiously avoided before (same with most any controversial, much-discussed subject on here - I don't have much of an appetite for flamewars).

As for the "retard/retarded" thing, I tend not to use such words pejoratively myself, though as with many other potentially offensive terms (some of which I use, some of which I don't) I'm not gonna play schoolmarm and tell other adult human beings what they can and can't say. And my reasons for not using "retard" have nothing to do with "political correctness" (and I hate that phrase anyway), but rather are personal - I don't have a significant disability myself, but as a kid I was quite "slow" in terms of social and other non-academic skills (despite being in some ways the smartest in my class), and that was enough for me to be branded a retard among my peers.

Empathy isn't a thing that just self-generates, you know - it has to come, in some way, out of real lived experience. And my own experience suggests that using mental retardation as an insult is a can of worms I'd better not open.

[CTyankee]

87. It sounds to me, from your last sentence, that you have a world of pain you do not want to

talk about. I may be wrong of course and you are free to correct me. But I hear that a name calling so young of being "retarded" can be a terribly hurtful thing to a young child.

In this post, I have been asking DUers to please consider the hurtful side effects of the dismissive language of "retard" and "retarded" on other human beings. Is this what we, on DU, aspire to as humans? Is this our highest calling as "progressives"?

I am just asking this question. People reading my post and this thread could ask themselves whether this is something they wish to engage in.

That is really all I am talking about here....

[nomorenomore08]

88. Nah, not a world of pain. Perhaps a small nation-state.

;)

But speaking more seriously, I don't consider my "pain" any more significant in the grand scheme of things than anybody else's - my wounds are my own, and nothing more than that. I'm not gonna ask anybody for special accommodation for my personal feelings, which is partly why, as I said, I reject the role of language-lecturer - though feel free to pick up the slack if you'd like. :)

And in the end, what's really important here is not some offhand comment Obama made, but rather his apparent intention to do more for disabled Americans than any recent President. Little thing about actions speaking louder than words, and all that...

[CTyankee]

90. And I agree about Obama. I love him and want to see him succeed.

And yes, of course, to some extent we all grow up in some kind of hurt; it's part of life. I am sorry you type cast me as a language lecturer. I was trying to be a bit more socratic, asking questions about why would someone use one term that could be hurtful to a group of people and not use another. It was a question, not a lecture.

[dem629]

21. Depends on the situation.

But rarely would be my answer. And the main reason for that, by far, is that it's lazy. There are better and more clever and funny ways to express the idea.

[Schema Thing]

22. When I've used "retard" in the past, it certainly wasn't intended as an

insult to retarded people.


It was intended as an insult to fully functional people who CHOOSE not to use their brain function.


There has NEVER been a point in my life (even as a teenager) when I would have tried to hurt the mentally or physically challenged.

That said, language changes, for good reasons or bad, and therefore I don't use the word "retard" anymore. I tend to think this comes from the natural change in language that happens after the change from the use of "retardation" to "developmentally disabled".

People who look for reasons to take offense over language... are either stupid (unable to understand how language "happens"), or just imo, ugly assholes, personality-wise (insist that everyone conform to their new, shiny hyper-correctness).

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

23. I Find Retard To Be Offensive, But Not Retarded. I'll Use Retarded Freely.

Retarded is an adjective and when I use it, it is usually with accurate context. I find nothing wrong with using the term. But retard to me is a different distinction, because it is far more direct in its relation to the mentally disabled. When I hear retart or retard, I immediately can visualize a mentally impaired person as context and as the intended comparison for the target of the putdown to make, to visualize themselves as if they were one etc. I find it derogatory and demeaning since it is a direct putdown that uses a specific group of people as ammunition; much like calling someone a fag.

But though some could say "what stupid logic! How can you say that for the noun but not the adjective? It's the same thing!", I disagree. When I hear or see someone use retarded, or I use it myself, I don't get the same direct visual of a severely mentally disabled person. It generally just means 'really dumb'. If someone says "god you're retarded" the target generally will not immediately visualize himself as if he was one with a severe mental disability, but instead will just think no further than having been called stupid.

Also, retard is used directly as a noun on a person. Retarded as an adjective can have many more broad uses, such as "the logic you just wrote is really retarded". I find absolutely nothing wrong with the adjective being used in such a way.

[CTyankee]

40. Unfortunately, the example you used is not really helpful.

If you say "the logic you just wrote is really retarded," I am afraid I don't quite know what you are trying to tell me. Is it just a insult like "You're stupid"? But how am I stupid? Wouldn't it be better to say "the logic you just expressed is faulty" but then of course I would have to prove my point and say just why I found said logic to be faulty. Or I could say your logic makes no sense or "I don't think you've thought this through." But in any case I would be required to back up my statement.

Just saying one's logic is "retarded" doesn't tell me anything...

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

42. Let Me Assure You Of Something:

Regardless of your personal lack of understanding, 99.9% of people hearing "that logic is retarded" would immediately know exactly what was meant by it.

Furthermore, saying one's logic is retarded is at risk of needing to be backed up the same as the other examples you used.

[CTyankee]

49. Uh, would you use that statement in, say, a letter to the editor pointing out why Republicans are

wrong about an issue you care about? If not, why not?

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

75. I Wouldn't Use 'Dumb' Or 'Stupid' Either.

But then we're not exactly talking about using it in formal settings, now are we. Very disingenuous reply on your part.

[CTyankee]

85. Well, we are talking about our language. If you are hesitant about using it in a public forum,then

you must have a reason. I asked why. It would seem to me that if the language you wish to use in speech is so useful, why wouldn't you use it in writing a LTTE. Seems reasonable to me? What is it about the use of the words "retards" and "retarded" are OK in vernacular but not in written English?

All I am asking is your explanation.

[Viking12]

25. Only when people write "non" when they appear to have meant "noun"

What if people use it as a verb?

[CTyankee]

43. I was deficient in usage of my proofreading skills! Actually, I was lazy!

The use of "retard" as a verb of course is different, because it can be used in many other contexts than "retard" as "REEtard." And also such words as "flame-retardant."

[Viking12]

48. I appreciate that you can take a joke.

Sadly, too many people here would get awfully wound up by my post.

Enjoy the weekend.

[CTyankee]

52. You, too, Viking!

:hi:

[wtmusic]

28. Never. nt

[40ozDonkey]

31. For the Lurking Freepers who'll become Special Needs Advocates now...

I'm sure the cantservatives will show how outraged they were that one of their own would publish a title that's so insulting.
Lets see the proof.

Oh, it's on their bookshelf?

'Kay.

[KharmaTrain]

33. It's Also A Generational Thing...

I have a learning disabled family member, but growing up in the 60's, the term "retarded" was a term I regularly heard...and in many ways. My family used it in a clinical manner...as opposed to the kids in my class who threw it around in a perjorative manner. That was then...when many ethnic, sexual and racial slurs were far more in the open.

I'd like to think time had made people more aware and sensitive to how we define ourselves. The term disabled, handicapped and challenged replaced retarded in most people's vernacular and it depended on the person's disability. My children have grown up in a different environment and they see the word in a more offensive view than I do.

Just as we've had discussions and the evolution on how groups in this country prefer to identify themselves, maybe this will be an opportunity to have a discussion about some of the most ignored in our society...those who can't always speak for themselves.

Cheers...

[Baikonour]

34. Are you comparing "retarded" to the "n" word?

Sigh.

[CTyankee]

44. In the sense that it is an insult, yes. What I am saying is that if we would NOT use

the N word, why would we use ree-tard or retarded? It is looking down on people who are "different" and "not as good." I can't think of any other explanation for its usage...

[Echo In Light]

46. Agreed. Context is everything. "Retard," "gay," "socialist," etc

People seek to beat up on anyone who differs from the perceived consensus "reality," and will target any social scapegoat they think is acceptable i.e. free of cultural backlash for openly doing so. The same venom fuels a large portion of the online, anti-conspiracy theorist crowd also.

[tangent90]

47. I frequently use 'retard' as a verb.

...

[Dorian Gray]

51. Nope

and I think they are obnoxious. People who do use "retard" usually sound ignorant.

[uppityperson]

53. Thank you. I've alerted on "retarded" posts and will be off DU is that term is ok to use, similar to

cunt and nigger. http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=385&topic_id=286425&mesg_id=286504

PC math

"intellectual disabilities" = retarded + 7 syllables

The number of syllables is inversely proportionate to the level of offense taken by PC language advocates.

Following this premise, saying the word retarded multiple times, in order to account for the syllabic deficiency, should mathematically offset the offensiveness.

"intellectual disabilities" = retarded-retarded-retarded + 1 syllable


Therefore, the statement, "Special Olympics are for retarded retarded retarded people." is less offensive than the statement, "Special Olympics are for retarded people."

[dysfunctional press]

55. yep.

mostly when i'm alone in my car- in response to the actions of other would-be 'drivers'.

the 'see you next tuesday' word comes out quite a bit as well.

[azmouse]

58. I stopped using those words when I left elementary school.

If anyone is still using them, it's time to grow up.

[marshall]

59. More appropriately, do you compare your own inept skills to a handicapped person's?

The comparison can be made without using loaded words.

[cynatnite]

60. As I understood it, "mentally retarded" is an acceptable term in the medical field...

At least it was for the 15 years I spent in it. Now, I don't know anyone except obnoxious grade school kids throwing around words like "retard" and that's still pretty rare.

[uppityperson]

61. Being in the medical field, it isn't.

Was 30 yrs ago when I started, but not now. Developmentally delayed or disabled is.

[cynatnite]

62. Well, I don't know...

I haven't worked in the field for several years, but "mental retardation" was a completely acceptable diagnostic term. I do recall that "mentally handicapped" was also widely acceptable, as well.

oh, here are a few links...

http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/289117-overview

http://www.mrrc.npi.ucla.edu/

[uppityperson]

63. Could be places I work/worked don't use it.

[aikoaiko]

93. Its changing. Even the venerable journal Mental Retardation changed its name to...

....Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities .

[Lost in CT]

69. Developmentally delayed always sounded to my ear that someone would catch up...

needless to say that doesn't happen.

[Quantess]

74. No, very often children with developmental delays do catch up.

Simply having a developmental delay does not mean that someone is mentally retarded, especially if they are a young child. For example, speech and language delays are extremely common in young children, and, the younger that treatment begins, the better the outcome of normal speech and language skills. This is why early intervention is important.

If an adult "has developmentally delays", it is more of a past-tense way of describing the onset of their difficulties. It lets people know that their cognitive difficulties are not due to a traumatic brain injury, or some other late-onset loss of function.

[Lost in CT]

76. Well then you shouldn't call kids developmentally delayed that clearly are not.

A learning disability is just that... it should have nothing to do with retardation.

[Quantess]

81. Children with LD often have delays in some aspects of their development.

But a learning disability is not synonymous with developmental delay. Sometimes a child with learning disabilities also has mental retardation, and sometimes they have normal or above average IQ.

I don't have the time to explain all the nuances of child development, and the categories and labels attatched to people with disabilities or delays. But it is clear that labels are not consistent, nor do they have to be. The important thing is that people need to see the person first, and do an individual assessment of their capabilities, not "judge a book by its cover".

[iamthebandfanman]

94. im sure there are some whod take offense to those as well

as they would disagree that they were 'disabled'...

just like a lot of people dont like the word handicaped...

[Odin2005]

70. "mental retardation" refers to an individual with an IQ below 70.

[Catshrink]

64. My cat is "Ricky Retardo"

because he's the dumbest cat in the world. But I don't use the term in any other context. BTW, another cat is named Lucy so instead of Ricky Ricardo he's Ricky Retardo, again because he's so stupid.

[madinmaryland]

65. I was going to ask the same thing. It's amazing the stupid things they do.

[Lost in CT]

66. retarded is a real word and has many uses besides mental illness

I don't use retard however.

[KamaAina]

67. No, and I call people out here for doing it all the time

many self-advocates view those words as offensive slurs on par with the N-word. Special Olympics has a website devoted to the subject:

http://www.r-word.org

[Fleshdancer]

71. Not anymore

I'm old enough now to analyze the words I choose to say. It's a maturity thing.

[timtom]

77. Nope.

Never have. Never will.

I never liked the work "freeptard", either.

[Kip Humphrey]

78. Let me check...

...
dick head,
fucker,
stupid,
asshole,
Cheney lite,
stinkin' pile of shit,
arrogant,
Republicon,
ass wipe,
fascist,
Bushette,
war criminal,
liar,
freeper...


Nope. No retard or retarded.

[Mike 03]

79. I used to, shamefully. But a couple of years ago there was a discussion of this here on DU that

made me aware that it hurt others, so I've stopped.

EDIT: I am a huge Howard Stern fan, and it was a habit I was infected with from him.

[MrSlayer]

80. Occasionally.

Not here of course but in real life conversation I will use it if someone says or does something worthy.

[treestar]

82. I don't, but then there is a problem of what is left to use

i use "idiot" but that used to be the term for people who are now considered mentally disabled. Is it offensive to use that term to a person's face? If not a joke, probably yes. Is it OK to call, say Bush, and idiot?

There's a line that is blurred there.

And there are people for whom we want such a word. Many words are too offensive and reminding of the mentally disabled. It is those who are not mentally disabled, but ignorant and mean by choice. Maybe the best term is "freeper."

[CTyankee]

86. Bush et al are people who had every advantage that society offered them and scoffed

and blew off their responsibilities. They couldn't have cared less.

People with retardation and other disabilities were born with these problems, no fault of their own.

My problem is with people whoknow better and just don't do right. That's plain wrong.

I think "idiot" is a perfect term to describe these awful people. But I would prefer to call them "criminals."

[omega minimo]

83. People who do that are douchebags

:sarcasm:

[Orsino]

84. These are among the ugliest and most cowardly of slurs.

I think less of people who use them.

[Nye Bevan]

89. My kids sometimes do and I *hate* it

I am doing everything I can to stop them doing this. The other thing I hate is their use of "gay" as an insult. Any other DUer parents advice on this would be appreciated.

[L0oniX]

91. Eventually even "moran" will be politically incorrect ....pffft

[Joey Liberal]

92. No, I don.t. It's offensive. nt

[No.23]

95. Speaking as a parent.

Oops! I may have placed this post in the wrong thread.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=389&topic_id=5298154&mesg_id=5302029

Sorry about that.

[tinkerbell41]

96. Yes: I should be ashamed

I do and I guess I use it like I would call someone gay, but having gays and lesbians in my family and friends, I realized it wasn't right, If I had someone who was mentally retarded in the family I would be more sensitive to it. It's not okay .