Born again b and b

[catmandu57]

We're going to take a mini vacation next month to Mansfield Mo so my wife can go to the laura Ingles Wilder house and museum there. Since it's going to take the better part of the day to drive there I contacted the chamber of commerce inquiring about lodging.

I get an email telling me i have two choices, the Little House Inn and the Born Again bed and breakfast.

Now, the marshmallow has been wanting to stay at a b and b, but not this one, we're going to get a room at the Inn.

We're going into the heart of bible thumping country and leaving my car at home because it's plastered with dem stickers, and I want to make it back in one piece.

[trotsky]

1. We stayed at a religious b&b once.

Didn't know that's what it was until we checked in and got to our room which had little framed bible verses on every damn wall.

Oh well, as my wife likes to say, "If you don't believe in the magic, it can't hurt you."

[onager]

2. Fun with Gideon Bibles...

Does anyone else ever get creative with the Gideon Bibles in hotel rooms? I travel a lot in my job, so I'm constantly running into them. The Marriott chain also gives you a Book Of Mormon, in case you prefer a goofy American religion.

Of course, I would NEVER advocate this sort of property damage. I was just wondering.

I'm not suggesting that you write the URL to atheists.com inside the cover or anything... O8)

[trotsky]

3. Oh, I *never* write anything in the Gideon bibles.

I would never consider writing things like "This book is full of lies." and "Close this book and open your mind!"

[beam me up scottie]

4. GASP!

That was you?

[opiate69]

7. "What's a Gideon?"

...Ever met one, no! Ever seen one, no! But they're all over the fuckin' world, putting bibles in hotel rooms!! Where are thry from? Gidea? WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE PEOPLE????........................I'm gonna capture a Gideon. 'Hello, Room Service? I don't seem to have a Bible in my room'...."

[onager]

8. How a Gideon Bible helped me overcome loneliness one night...

Somebody had scrawled inside the cover: The hostess in the coffee shop f*cks like a mink.

Now that I think of it, that's the most useful advice I've ever found in any Bible.

[A HERETIC I AM]

6. I stay in hotels ALL the time...and when i get into my room and find a

bible opened, laying on the nightstand it goes in the trash and i usually make sure i have dumped some other trash on top of it so that it indeed makes it to the dumpster. I have even tossed them out into the hallway if i am in a really bad mood! If it is in the drawer (Where it belongs) i just leave it where it is. When i find one opened i see it as an attempt by the housekeeper to proselytize to me. Leave the damned thing in the drawer! If i want to read a book of tales with morality points, I'll read a copy of Grimm's or Aesop's.

[beam me up scottie]

11. Replace it with this new and improved bible!

NEW LESBIAN BIBLE BOOTS MEN OUT OF GOOD BOOK

By Mark Miller Weekly World News

#########

In an occurrence bound to outrage the Religious Right, a San Francisco publisher is about to release the world's first lesbian version of the Bible!

"The one tiny difference, barely noticeable, between ours and the regular Bible," explains publisher Wanda Carp, "is that there are absolutely no men in The Lesbian Bible." Among the slightly altered Biblical tales will be those of Adamina and Eve, Noelle's Arc, Danielle in the Lion's Den, Jane and Her Coat of Many Colors, Mona Receiving the Ten Commandments and Jonelle Inside the Belly of the Whale.

Instead of Jesus, The Lesbian Bible features Justine, the daughter of God, who tells her twelve hot female disciples, "Let she who is without sin leave now, for it is far more fun to be around sinners. Now remove your clothing and let me closely inspect the divine images in which God made you." What follows is the first appearance of an X-rated jacuzzi scene in any Bible.

Carp reveals that her publishing company is also at work on lesbian versions of the U.S. Constitution, the Bill of Rights and the Dr. Seuss books.

#########

http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/religion/61516

[catmandu57]

5. So, we shouls stay at the born again

to subvert it? What happens when I transform into a thinking creature and make the fundies question their beliefs?

[politicat]

9. We had that problem once....

DH's mom scheduled us at a B&B in North Carolina. Got there and found the owners were Moonie followers.

At least it was only one night.

I hope your wife does realize that the books were largely re-written by Rose Wilder Lane to conform with her ideas of government propriety, and were basically re-built to be vehicles of Libertarianism.

[Gelliebeans]

10. have a great time

I've always wanted to see the Laura Ingles Wilder house and museum but I live too far for a trip and since I try for the most part to stay out red states for my own sanity I don't know if I will get there anytime soon.
:)

[orleans]

12. "we're going to get a room at the Inn"

wouldn't it be ironic if once you got there you were told there was no room at the inn?

then you could shout out: "does everything have to be so religious around here???"

inn or b & b. hard call. i keep thinking if you end up at the b & b you might run into someone like the piper laurie character from Carrie.