Some advice please

[teenagebambam]

My partner (of 18 years - (we're to be legally married soon, but that's another story) has lots of big plans, plans that could bring the both of us, if not wealth, immense career satisfaction. Initiating the plans would, necessarily, involve a bit of risk and "jumping in with both feet". I have no doubt that my partner can accomplish anything he decides he's going to do, as that has been his pattern over the past 18 years. Yet, whenever he starts talking about said plans, I find myself verging on becoming a wet blanket, talking about not thinking too expansively, weighing all the risks, etc. I REALLY don't want to be that person, especially in this climate where our intentions are supposed to so rapidly come to fruition! Is there any technique I can use to calm myself down a little bit and just trust in the positive energy?

[Sienna86]

1. Leap of faith

I am not an expert, just some life experience under my belt. I would gently suggest you consider what you fear about potential success you may encounter. What makes you uneasy?

[teenagebambam]

2. As a couple....

...we are coming out of a period of financial distress....moved several states away for my partner's job, the move left me without full-time employment for a year, plus his job ended up being really a horrible fit for him....we bought and lost a house, and $60,000 in the process....and so I guess what I fear MOST is a repeat or a perpetuation of our financial woes.

[ricochetastroman]

3. Uranus AND Jupiter are in Aries

it's time to let go

It isn't easy

but that is the answer

Holding back will amplify Pluto's stressors at this time; the worst thing you can do now (Astrologically) is to hold on to some mythical "safety"

That's just me, not having seen your chart.

Good luck to you both :hi:

[teenagebambam]

4. It's not the first time you've said that

nor are you the only one saying it! Thanks!

[Tumbulu]

5. I am not one for talking yourself into taking a risk.

Since you have already taken a huge risk and lost your own employment and your home and so much money, it seems completely realistic to learn whatever lessons you can from this expensive educational project. I used to joke that my first business related mistake cost me the same amount of money as a Harvard MBA. So I felt compelled to study and learn every lesson this pricey experience came into my life to teach me.

So, if you feel that you have learned what this past leap of faith has come to teach you, and you have the money to risk, then by all means think about it.

But if you still feel bewildered and frightened from it, then don't pretend you are not. For me, if I feel one way and try to talk myself into acting another, I fail to convince myself. I have to believe in my core that it is the right move.

I benefited so much from reading Pema Chodrin's book titled "When Things Fall Apart".

It helped me feel all the emotions clearly, cleanly and then I was able to move on.

Good luck in your journey.

[Shallah Kali]

6. some times you have to feel it to heal it

can you stand to let yourself experience the fear unobstructed to release it's charge and maybe locate what it arises from? What I am trying to articulate is grounding and preparing yourself as if you are about to meditate but your focus is the anxiety. Where do you feel it in your body? breathe into those areas. Do any images, sensations or memories arise as you sit with the emotion. Things like similar situations of great change might come to mind along with unresolved emotional charge or something totally unrelated like a current stressful event that left you more emotionally reactive at this time. In any case try to stay with relaxed breathing and stay with what rises up riding the wave until the emotional energy wears itself out. If this is too much it might be better to do this in short sessions of 5 or 10 minutes rather than tackling it all at once. If you do choose to try this it might help you figure out if your worry is based on facts, your intuition, unreleased emotional residue from past experiences or a combination there of.

I do use this technique on myself alone when it is something i know I can handle and save the big stuff for when I work with my therapist.

[NuttyFluffers]

7. speak your fears honestly, following up that you trust them and stand by them.

and then ask them where you can help them prepare. it will be the act of preparing that will calm your reservations. it serves two functions: first, it makes your partner to articulate his aspirations into practical step-by-step actions; second, the act of research and preparations would allow you to see the tangibility of this goal -- and either calm you down or allow you to foresee how to create contingency plans.

basically one wants a leap of faith, the other agrees but asks "where to?", the first says "here", and the other agrees and prepares. in this way, in the middle of the leap, the other can see the goal as well, and if together veering off target can offer "near enough" as an option.