Sad, but necessary, question: at what point do you cease searching for a lost cat?

[booksenkatz]

Let me preface this by saying that in the 4 years we had this wondrous being in our lives, it was a constant, never-ending battle to keep her inside! Every time a door opened, even for a moment, she would pounce at the chance for an adventure. My husband, son & I were constantly warning each other, "Watch out, here she comes, she's right behind you, hold her for me while I go out," etc. Let me also say that we run a kitty-centered home with every creature comfort, so there is no way she was miserably treated and needed to escape! Our two cats are like children to us. Every once in awhile she would escape, but she would return after a short adventure around our home. She knew her way back. She'd had outdoor adventures prior to our adopting her.

(She's the kitty in my sig line, isn't she lovely? And terribly clever... she loved to play fetch, just like a dog.)

On the afternoon of Jan. 5th, she escaped through the garage. My young son & I searched in the immediate vicinity of a few houses, but couldn't find her. I was sure she'd return that night, so I stayed up all night waiting. By the time the sun came up, I was sick with worry, and I've been miserable ever since.

It will be 6 weeks tomorrow, Feb. 16, since she left. In that time, I've done everything possible to get her back. Our township doesn't allow posters, I'm only allowed to have a large sign in my yard. Luckily, I am at a corner that is somewhat frequented by half people in our subdivision. I printed flyers to hang on every doorknob. I've placed ads in the local paper, posted signs in vet offices & pet stores, posted online at about 15 places. I walk the area several times a day, have combed through some neighbors' yards (and mine), I've emptied vacuum bags out into the garden, I've put her litterbox in the front garden bed, along with items that have her scent and our scents on them, her bed is on the front porch, I put out stinky food every night... it's a full time job! The problem is the time of year: we've had numerous heavy snows, temps down to zero, ungodly wind chills. If it were summer, people would be outside, they'd be in touch with their yards, it would be easier to notice a stray.

The cat has a breakaway collar with my phone number on it, plus she is micro-chipped. The fact that no one has contacted me despite these identifiers makes me fear the worst -- it means she has not yet come into human hands. At the same time, it could be that someone has her, but she's lost the collar and they simply have not taken her to a vet yet. It doesn't always cross a person's mind to have a cat scanned for a chip.

Everything I've read on the subject says that cats do not travel far, especially in the snowy wintertime, and that it is highly likely she is close by. I also know that she is smart, and a good huntress, and there are a thousand places for her to shelter herself.

But I'm at a crossroads. I've got this sign in my yard for 6 weeks... a desperate person in denial of the obvious? At what point do I remove the sign? At what point do I admit that this beloved cat is not coming back, and move forward? What amount of time is fair? I've read many stories of cats who return months later, but I notice that those stories never include blizzards in them. The realist in me is struggling with the sentimental sap whose grief is deep and at times overwhelming. I've cried a thousand tears and am emotionally raw. I swear I will look for this cat for the rest of my life, she was my daily companion who did just about everything with me.

Have any of you ever been in this situation? At what point did you decide to get on with your life and let the pet become a part of your past? It's a heck of a way to start the new year, I feel that at some point I am going to have to get into 2011! Thanks for reading this, and thanks for any words of advice.

[roody]

1. So sorry. Give it a couple more weeks.

I lost a cat once that I did allow outdoors. I saw her one year later. She was living up the street. But I only had had her for a few weeks when she went out and adopted someone else.

[murielm99]

2. We lost a cat for four months.

I am pretty sure he was injured and he holed up somewhere, and then someone started to feed him.

Later, he went to someone else's back door and meowed. They let him in. The couple who let him in decided that such a well-behaved, friendly cat must belong to someone. They put an ad in the paper. So I got my cat back, four months later.

He was in town, and I live in the country, two miles south of town. He did go pretty far away.

[booksenkatz]

3. Wow! Sounds like I need to leave the door open awhile longer.

The hardest thing is not knowing. When I've had to euthanize pets in the past, it was such a painful thing to deal with, but nothing like this, with no closure. Plus, she only just turned 5; with so much life ahead of her, it's impossible to imagine that it's already over! She desperately wanted an adventure, and I have to think of her as having a really great one... it's the only way I can get through the day sometimes.

Thanks for your replies, I really appreciate it.

[david13]

4. Well, I think the most important thing is acceptance. That this is the

situation, and that you are helpless other than what you have done.
At some point in time this cat may come back. Just for a visit. But I think there is every possibility that the cat is simply living happily with someone else.
Or maybe several someone elses. A cat that wants to roam that much usually can find something worthwhile, or come home.
My conclusion is that the cat is alive and well. Somewhere. Maybe even nearby.
Cats cannot tell time.
dc

[booksenkatz]

5. That's what my husband's been saying

He loved this cat, too, but as he said, "the die has been cast."

I'm striving to move forward while continuing to look for her out of the corner of my eye. This is a very pet-friendly neighborhood, I like to think that she merely went a direction I haven't covered and has taken up residence with someone else.

Thanks for the cool-headed assessment!:)

[emilyg]

6. My Sl stayed gne fr

mre than six mnths and came hme. Srry my 0 key nt wrking.

[TuxedoKat]

7. Does the food you put out get eaten?

Have you tried using a trap? One of my cats ran away three times (outdoor access cat) and I had to trap her to get her back. Sometimes cats get trapped in garages, etc. There is a missing cat group on yahoo that was helpful to me in getting my cat back. It sounds like you've done just about everything though. I haven't been on it in a couple of years though, so there may be new info that I don't know. Here is the group if you are interested:

http://pets.groups.yahoo.com/group/MissingCatAssistance/

Good luck, I hope your cat comes back if she is still out there. I know how hard it is to go through this.

Traps are around $30 from Home Depot.

[booksenkatz]

8. Yes

Yes, I've seen 2 neighborhood cats digging into the buffet, and lately a raccoon has joined in. I really don't mind, as I'm used to playing neighborhood Mother Goose, and I'm hoping that if my cat is still around, she could trace a trail via the other cats, since snow is covering everything so heavily. It's somewhat easier to find a lost cat in warmer weather, as there are several tricks that can be done that just don't work in the cold & snow! There are no websites that provide guidance for finding a cat in the winter, but I'm about ready to create one. For example, they always recommend putting out strong-smelling wet food, but they never tell you what to do when the food freezes into a solid rock after 10 minutes! And scattering the vacuum bag contents near the door is a great idea, until 12" of snow falls and buries what you just scattered. Then there are the blizzard days, when everything you've put out blows away. Therefore, finding a cat in the winter takes extra effort and more thinking outside the (litter)box.

I did buy a trap and am ready to use it if I get an idea that my cat's back in the area. I've been watching the tracks in the snow closely, and so far I haven't seen hers, which are quite small. It's odd to think of having to trap your own cat, but it's my understanding that they turn instinctively to their wild roots pretty quickly in order to survive. She's smart and she's a good hunter, so I am still hopeful, in spite of the weather here.

I appreciate the link, will definitely check it out, and I welcome all advice. It's so hard to give up until I am satisfied that I've done everything I can do to get her back. I'm not really sure when enough's enough, though. Sometimes I feel like an idiot, like it's all a waste of time. Then the sun comes up and I'm ready to try again. I'm just glad that she has a micro-chip. She may lose her collar, but the micro-chip is always with her.

Thanks for the reply!

[CountAllVotes]

10. that could be it - the raccoon

I used to live in a place that had raccoons aplenty. They are NOT our friends.

In fact, one of my cats went missing. I found her a few days later lying in the driveway of the duplex I was renting at that time. She'd been badly beaten up and had managed to crawl her way back to the driveway of the duplex. The vet figured it was a raccoon that got her.

After this episode, I tried to keep her in at night as much as I could. Luckily she recovered but it took a long time as the raccoon that got her bit a hole straight through her front leg. :(

I hope that you cat didn't get beat up by a raccoon. If she did, she probably crawled away somewhere if possible to recover.

She may show up yet but I'm very suspicious that the raccoons got her.

Do not encourage raccoons into your home or anywhere near your house for that matter; most certainly DO NOT FEED THEM. They will come inside at night if you leave the door or window open. They carry rabies, etc. and can be incredibly vicious.

In the meantime, I am very sorry to read about this. :hug:

:dem:

[booksenkatz]

11. Raccoons

Yes, when I lived in Florida for 7 years, and was young and stupid, I fed gangs of raccoons. Very dangerous hobby, I don't recommend it! There are not that many of them around here, but who's to say.

The odd thing is how it seems as if my cat literally was lifted off the planet by aliens... one moment she was here, the next moment, she no longer existed! Not a whisker. I'm wondering if someone saw her, felt sorry for her, and carried her off in a car? She knew how to get home, as she had escaped twice before, but she never went far, and I was shocked when she didn't show up that same night. But again, I've never had a cat that was so eager to have an adventure! Constantly by the door, or looking out a window, as if on a mission. She loved us and seemed very happy with us, but this mission always had her attention. I hope she found whatever it was she was always looking for.

I'm just glad she's micro-chipped. If I ever see her again, I'm sure it will be because of that.

[CountAllVotes]

13. I had a Maine Coon that took off like that

He was a kitten at the time and I put signs up all around the area in case someone found him.

My husband went out looking for him. It was a cold wet day and he walked by a small farmhouse that was nearby. A man was outside and he asked him if he'd seen a kitten around. The man said YES he had and that it was inside of the house. It was my Maine Coon!

That cat was like that too - on a mission from where I do not know.

He was highly curious and got himself into a lot of messes and hunted a lot too.

I ended up having to place him in another home being he was basically going to be killed soon by someone due to his mischievous behavior (he was a temperamental cat and didn't like people much). He got damn lucky is what happened, a farmer wanted a ratter for his farm and adopted him. Said farmer is a millionaire living south of me.

I still miss my Maine Coon but he is in a better home that I could have ever given him.

Maybe someone picked the cat up? You just don't know.

I hope your cat returns home soon. You just never know!

[booksenkatz]

15. Thanks! And I love your Twain sig/pic, by the way! :) NT

[CountAllVotes]

17. just fyi (OT I know!) - Mark Twain was a cat lover

I cannot find the citation these days (wrecked brain?) but I do remember reading about how Mark Twain used to rent a few cats when he went away on vacation (hell, I'd do the same, gotta have my kitties!). :D

More Mark Twain/cat quotes here:

http://www.twainquotes.com/Cats.html

[KC]

9. I don't know

about where you are or if the streets there have the drainage areas, like they do in Texas and here in NC, but
a lot of strays climb down in those, and I'm wondering if she might have done that and could be living there or possibly
actually be kind of snowed in, if the snow hasn't cleared or melted recently.
Just a thought.

[booksenkatz]

12. Maybe

I grew up in Texas and I know what you are talking about with drainage ditches, and we don't have many of those up here. But I agree with you that it is quite possible for her to be living under a snowed-in deck or under a shed or outbuilding, feasting on birds, mice & shrews. I'll be very interested in seeing what the spring thaw turns up. Maybe spring will bring her home to us, or perhaps someone will find the carcass of a gorgeous kitty in their yard. In that case, I hope the person would be kind enough to phone the number on her pink collar and just let me know. Boy, the not knowing really is wearing me out!

Thanks again to everyone who responded on this thread -- it's a lonely feeling when you've got a pet missing.:(

[NNN0LHI]

14. Lost an inside cat that got loose outside once for over two months

Finally found her in the garage. Skin and bone. She was a full grown cat but we thought we found a kitten under the car one morning. It was Mazie. Been missing for over two months. She was very skittish. No one that came over ever knew we had a cat. She hid under the bed. We think she was hiding in the garage the entire time.

I hope you find yours soon and I wouldn't give up yet.

Good luck.

Don

[booksenkatz]

16. Thanks Don! And so glad you found Mazie!! NT