Please fill me in -- Why no Cheney-Edwards handshake?

[Sparkly]

I heard they won't be shaking hands, but I don't know why. Which side asked for this? Could Edwards 'challenge' Cheney to a handshake?

[mac56]

1. Because the BC camp doesn't want the two pictured side by side?

Youth and optimism next to age and treachery?

Just a guess.

[bushisanidiot]

2. Edwards Should Offer To Shake the Penguin's hand as soon as the debate

starts. To hell with the rules. Put that evil old bag on the spot and watch him squirm! ;)

[DemocratSinceBirth]

6. Exactly- I Would Shake His Hand...

Cheney will be so unnerved he might foul himself...

[auburngrad82]

25. Edwards could shuffle his feet and short Crashcart's pacemaker

with static electricity.

[tridim]

10. Yep.. and then we can laugh at the Freeps

"Edwards broke the rules, he had the audacity to actually shake Dick's hand!"

Edwards should also pull his pen out, hold it up to the camera and mouth the words, "Is this okay with you freepers?"

[librechik]

3. John will immediately sense that Cheney is an alien cyborg

Can't let him get too close. Dick still looks like plastic.

[RubyDuby in GA]

4. Would you want to shake that hand??

To touch the flesh of Satan and try to debate after that.
He'd be tainted. They'd have to call in a HazMat team. It's for the best, really.

[w13rd0]

5. They are afraid Cheney will wilt...

...and his holographic disguise projection device will fail when it comes into human contact, thus revealing him for the alien demonic cyborg that he is...

[Demit]

7. Pugs paranoid? Edwards might be palming a joy buzzer? ZZZZZZZZZZT...

[MADem]

8. Cooties?

Edwards doesn't want to catch anything...he does have young children, after all!

Or perhaps they are afraid that the marathon runner will break every bone in StutteringHeart's hand?

I'll bet they shake hands. I think this is a newsphish ploy, just like the "we'll remove those lights with a screwdriver" threat was a ploy. It gives the reporters a tag to hang the debate story on, it increases viewership, and it makes people sense animus--America always enjoys a good knock-down, drag out fight.

[DemocracyInaction]

9. okay, my senses just went to high gear

The one thing Edwards does not want (remember the people don't know about these rules)is to look like he's rebuffing the bastard. Edwards has to make it very evident that the ugly bastard (and polls show he is not liked)is the one not affording this basic commone CIVILIZED courtesy. John needs to be the southern gentleman because women appreciate that. A Cheney who is reluctant to stick his hand out or rebuffs a handshake will turn women off. We don't teach our children to be that rude.

[ET Awful]

11. Because Merck recalled Cheney's arthritis meds, he can't get his claw open

to shake :)

[prayin4rain]

22. LOL...hahaha I'm with you....that is funny : )

[seabeyond]

12. then edward says

know we arent suppose to per rule, but geez, just what we do as a rule. otherwise just rude

[spanone]

Would anyone actually WANT to touch Cheney????? Yikes.

Scales I'm sure.

[spanone]

13. dupe

[grace0418]

14. I would love to see Edwards go for a handshake anyway

Then we'll hear Cheney cry out "It's burns! It burns!" as human skin makes contact with his slimy scales and he'll fall to the ground and melt into a green puddle of ooze.

Okay, that's my sci-fi fantasy. But seriously, I think watching Cheney wince at having to shake hands will help reveal how vile and odious he is.

[qnr]

15. Might muss up Cheney's tie...

Wasn't there a thread on how the freepers thought that Kerry deliberately held *'s hand in order get him to bend, screw up his tie, and look less Presidential?

[Cheswick2.0]

16. Cheney doesn't shake anyones hand anymore.......... it would reveal the

fact that he is already dead.

Zombie Cheney

[RobertSeattle]

17. Where do you get this - from MOU...

"For the October 5 vice presidential debate, the candidates shall
be pre-positioned before the program goes on the
air, and immediately after the program goes on
the air the candidates shall shake hands."

[Sparkly]

21. Maybe it's all a rumor

if so, I apologize! I've seen it online and heard people saying it, but can't find any credible source. I should have looked first.

[NormanConquest]

18. Residual charge from Cheney's pocket defibrillator?

He could suddenly discharge and give Edwards a serious shock!

[txindy]

19. How tall are John Edwards and Cheney?

I would definitely offer to shake hands if I was John Edwards, rules or no rules. Debaters always shake hands, plus it is common courtesy. The only way it could look odd on TV is if they DIDN'T shake hands. And you KNOW the *ies would later claim that it was John Edwards who insisted on not shaking hands, no matter what the truth may be.

[Ryan10]

20. Because Unka Dick won't be able to resist throwing a sucker punch!

[Philostopher]

23. Two possibilities:

1. -- They're going to install a ventilator/defibrillator device under Snarlin' Dick's chair so he doesn't flatline, but if he has to get up to shake hands, well ... it might stretch the connections too much.

2. -- And I admit this was a vision that came to me on the edge of sleep last night -- it would mean Cheney would have to take his hand out of the basket of kittens he'll be choking under the table through the whole debate to keep him from losing his grip and dropping f-bombs all over the place.

[caledesi]

24. No handshake with Cheney bec Edwards could get a shock

literally from Cheney and his defillibrator (sp?) device. I read when he first got this device installed that anyone who shook hands with him could get zapped.

Wouldn't that be hilarious, though. They shake hands and Edwards gets zapped.

cheney: uh, sorry
edwards: i guess this is your "shock and awe"