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Thirteen insight full thoughts on life with Little Miss Moose Douche
1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.
2. We also sleep in separate beds.
Hers is in Alaska and mine is in Texas .
3. I take Sarah everywhere .... but she keeps finding her way back.
4. I asked Sarah where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in
a long time!" she said. So I suggested the Governors Office.
5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she stands on the corner and speaks in tongues.
6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There
are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!". So I bought her an electric chair.
7. Sarah told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was; she told me "In the lake".
8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off. She sure is moose ass ugly.
9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late for the garbage?" The driver
said "No, jump in!"
10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
11. I married Miss Right... I just didn't know her first name was Always.
12. I haven't spoken to Sarah in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.
13. The last fight was my fault though. Sarah asked "What's on the TV?" I said Our next president...OBAMA!!"
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