George W. Bush's amazing firsts

[Perry Logan]

Here is a mind-boggling list of Bush Administration firsts:

first cokehead in the White House

First National Guard deserter

Lost more jobs in his first year than any President in history

Broke more international treaties than any in history

First President to close down the Post Office for three successive days (and if that isn't impeachable, what is?)

Lowest job growth in American history

More debt than all previous President's combined (WHOA!!!)

First administration to out a CIA agent for partisan reasons

Presided over the worst terror attack in world history

First President since the Civil War to lose an American city

First President thought by many leading historians to be The Worst President Ever™.

Spying on his people more than any administration since Stalin

First President to use a wire ("Dick? Dick!? I can't hear you!")

First President on antidepressants (& God know what else)

More vacation time than any other (which is a blessing for the country, really)

1st case of espionage in the White House

1st security breach of White House press room

Biggest intelligence failure in American history!

Worst response ever by a federal disaster agency

Highest incidents of suspected election fraud

Biggest deficit ever

1st fake and/or paid "journalists" in WHO press corps.

1st institutional use of torture.

Highest disparity of wealth in US history.

Largest increase in poverty since the depression.

1st loss of entire major US city.

First President to lose jobs on a monthly basis in 60 years.

First President in ten years under whom median household income fell.

Seven of the worst bankruptcies in U.S. history under Bush.

First time in ten years incomes fell. U.S. Census Bureau

first President since Herbert Hoover to preside over a net job loss.

Has shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in history.

Bush's tenure set an economic record for the most personal bankruptcies filed in any 12 month period.

Bush cut unemployment benefits for more out-of-work Americans than any other president in US history.

Bush set the all-time record for any president presiding during the most real estate foreclosures in a 12-month period.

Bush set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any other president in US history. (here)

Bush appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any president in US history. (here)

Bush presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud in any market in any country in the history of the world.

Bush is the all-time U.S. (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations.

Bush entered office with the strongest economy in US history and in less than two years every single economic category headed straight down.

First administration not to allow caskets of fallen soldiers to be viewed by the general public

For the first time in history the Department of Justice has barred its employees from holding its annual gay-pride event, DOJ Pride.

Bush has spent more money on polls and focus groups than any president in US history.

Bush presided over the biggest energy crises in US history and refused to intervene when corruption was revealed.

Bush dissolved more international treaties than any president in US history.

Bush is the first president in US history to compel the United Nations remove the US from the Human Rights Commission.

Bush refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war and by default no longer abides by the Geneva Convention.

Bush set the record for the fewest press conferences of any president since the advent of television.

Members of Bush's cabinet are the richest of any administration in US history.

largest exodus of career experts in every branch of the administration due to crony/idealogue appointments, from CIA to DOJ to EPA to NWS.

In his first two years in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs.

Set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock market.

Members of Bush Administration are the richest administration in history.

First year in office set the all-time record for most days on vacation by any president in U.S. history.

Cut unemployment benefits for more out-of-work Americans than any president in U.S. history.

Set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases.

First president in U.S. history to attack a sovereign nation against the will of the United Nations and the world community.

First U.S. president in history to have a majority of people in Europe (over 70%) view his presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and stability.

The biggest security failure in the history of the United States (still uninvestigated)

The first President to spend over 20% of his time on vacation or at Camp David.

The first U.S. President to invade another country.

First President to have 40% approval ratings less than a year in to their second term.

For the first time in 40 years Foreign applications to U.S. grad schools declined 28 percent last year.

He has set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest him in public venues (15 million people according to New York Times), shattering the record for protests against any person in the history of mankind.

First President in decades to execute a federal prisoner.

Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in U.S. history. Set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12 month period.

Set the record for the least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.

Signed more laws and executive orders amending the Constitution than any president in U.S. history.

Presided over the biggest energy crises in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption was revealed.

Presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history and refused to use the national reserves as past presidents have. Cut healthcare benefits for war veterans.

The most secretive and un-accountable of any administration in U.S. history.

Presided over the biggest corporate stock market frauds of any market in any country in the history of the world.

Created the largest government department bureaucracy in the history of the United States.

Set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in U.S. history.

First president in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the human rights commission.

Removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of congressional oversight than any presidential administration in U.S. history.

First president in U.S. history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. elections).

All-time U.S. (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations.

First president in U.S. history to unilaterally attack a sovereign nation against the will of the United Nations and the world community.

First president to run and hide when the U.S. came under attack (and then lied saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1).

First U.S. president to establish a secret shadow government.

First U.S. president in history to have the people of South Korea more threatened by the U.S. than their immediate neighbor, North Korea.

Set all-time record for number of administration appointees who violated U.S. law by not selling huge investments in corporations that bid for government contracts.

In a little over two years created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided the U.S. has ever been since the civil war.

For the first time in our history, a significant number of administration officials and supporters, including perhaps the President himself, must keep themselves and their party in power to avoid criminal indictment, conviction, and imprisonment.

Caused the infant mortality rate to go up for the first time in 40 years

Most corrupt administration ever.

Most hated President ever--the low poll numbers you see are heavily rigged in his favor.

The only President in U.S. history who continued his vacation when informed that a well known and capable enemy was PLANNING to attack the United States

the only President who continued reading his book when informed that that same enemy is ATTACKING the United States at that very moment.

First administration in U.S. history in which both President and vice President have criminal records

only president in US history that changes the law if the law doesn't suit his personal, religious and moral beliefs.

only president in US history to ever turn down an invite to address the NAACP

only administration to edit environmental reports to downplay the effects of greenhouse gas emissions on global warming

first President to make communism look good. Communist China is viewed more favorably than the U.S. in many long-time Western European allies, an international poll has found

Brutalized more words of the English language than any president in the history of the U.S.

First President to invade a country and lose

only President in American history to oversee three consecutive years of record high deficits.

only president in American history with no discernable brain activity (just kidding, Big Guy!)

only president in American history to fail to use the veto during a time of massive budget deficits

only president in American history to absolutely destroy another country

only President in American history to LOSE the popular vote but still get "elected" wink-wink nudge-nudge.

only President in American history to give in to the demands of terrorists.

only president in American history to disregard the civilian office of the Executive by wearing a military uniform. Not even the accomplished Generals Washington, Eisenhower, Grant, Jackson... No other president has worn military garb while in office except a fortunate son who dodged the draft.

First President to lie in his State of the Union address.

First president to lose jobs over the course of four years.

First President of the United States to have sperm in his mouth.

First President who may be insane.

First President to have an alcohol and drug problem at the same time.

First administration to consistently blame the preceding administration for its mistakes—after seven years in office.

First President not to have a "bounce" in the polls after his reelection (possibly because he wasn't reelected).

First President to be lied to by God (God guides GWB's decision-making; so She must be lying.

First President who knows the taste of a man's sweet meat.

First bisexual President who actively hates gays.

First President who refuses to attend the funerals of the soldiers who died because of him.

First administration to smear a Viet Nam War hero (several of them, actually).

First President with a known history of torturing animals.

First President thought by a majority of Americans to be an unelected, incompetent fraud.

First administration to let troops die because of inadequate equipment.

First administration that honest-to-God thought it could "create its own reality."

First President to have his face in another man's crotch (probably).

First President to have a male hooker lob softball questions to him at press conferences.

First President to actively subvert one of the pillars of American democracy: the separation of church and state.

first administration to openly declare a policy of unilateral aggression

first administration -- since the internment of Japanese-Americans in World War II-- to enact special laws for a specific ethnic group. Non-citizen young Muslim men are now required to register and subject themselves to interrogation.

first American president in memory to swagger around in a military uniform, though he himself-- like all of his most militant advisers-- evaded the Vietnam War. (Even Eisenhower, a general and a war hero, never wore his uniform while he was president).

first administration to create a military command -- Northcom -- responsible only for North America.) In other words, the most devastating costs of "9/11" we inflicted on ourselves in a way al-Qaeda was incapable of doing.

first administration to support shifting burden of Superfund toxic waste cleanups from polluters to taxpayers.

the first administration to argue openly that reducing openness in government is affirmatively desirable policy

first president to take credit for legislation passed over his own veto (1st campaign when he claimed credit for an education bill that in truth he vehemently opposed, just another lie to him)

first president to have utterly failed at every other business except politics, bankrupting his oil company and running his baseball team into the ground

first presidential administration to openly advocate torture

first presidential administration in the history of the nation to establish an office in the White House explicitly for the purpose of facilitating overseas outsourcing of labor.

only presidential administration in history that has been accused of misdeeds while working in the corporate sector

only presidential administration, in the countries history, that has failed to prevent a domestic attack.

only presidential administration to ever be bashed by former presidents.

first President to admit to an impeachable offense, per legal eagle John Dean.

the first president in US history to have the United Nations remove the USA from the Human Rights Commission.

the first president in US history to have the United Nations remove the USA from the Elections Monitoring Board.

The first president to lose two wars at the same time

Bush comes to Washington as the first president to lose the popular vote since 1888; he won the Electoral College by the narrowest margin in more than a century.

first President to fail to veto a single spending bill in his 1st term since Warren Harding

first administration to fail to voluntarily list a single endangered species

The Bush administration has the worst record on safety rules in OSHA's entire history.

worst record on jobs of any president in American history

first President to turn a record-breaking surplus into a record-breaking deficit—in record-breaking time

only President who's ever had a major terrorist attack happen on his watch

only President who's ever tried to pretend his private residence was an extension of the White House

only president who failed to prevent a direct attack on the Pentagon

only President with missing National Guard records

only President completely dominated and controlled by his VP

first President accused of engineering a fake terrorist attack against his own people

first President to choke on a pretzel

first President to choke on man-meat

first President to grant security clearance to a male hooker

only President to threaten his own people with nuclear war in order to start a war

first President a majority of Americans want impeached

first President to make all but the weirdest conspiracy theories sound plausible

first President whose name turns up on the voting machine, no matter which button is pushed

first President to flip the American people the bird (same to you, Big Guy!)

First dry drunk in the White House

first President to go into brainlock when told the country was under attack

first President thought by most people in the world to be the biggest threat to most people in the world

first (and last) neocon President

first Republican President as stupid as most Republicans

first Republican President to save the Democratic Party

first President with obvious neurological impairment

first President not impeached even though everyone knows he should be impeached

first President we're afraid to impeach because his VP is even scarier

first President who has most Americans wondering if they'll even make it through his lame duck year

first President who, in comparisons to Hitler, keeps looking almost worse than Hitler

first President to get Americans seriously thinking about a woman President or a black President

first President to benefit politically from a domestic terror attack he and his party allowed to happen

first President in a symbiotic relationship with a terrorist leader

first President to rely entirely on crackpot science

first President with poor impulse control

first President to blame someone else for all his failures

first President to fail the nation when it was under attack

first President to virtually cripple the military

first President who LITERALLY sucks

The only administration in American history, during a time of war, to propose tax cuts, much less openly arrogant tax-cuts for the wealthiest during any war

first administration in American history to start a war of choice based on bad information

first administration in American history not to raise taxes to pay for a protracted war.

first administration in history, of either party, who has failed to support the Clean Water Act.

first Administration in history that has a President of the United States, a Secretary of State, a Secretary of Defense, and a National Security Adviser, none of whom ever spent one minute wearing the uniform of the armed forces of the United States of America.

first administration in history that didn't issue a single major OSHA standard.

first administration in history that conducts foreign policy without diplomacy.

first administration in history to have lost our position at the UN Human Rights Commission.

first president in history to have executed a federal prisoner.

first president in history who once produced a Hollywood slasher B movie.

first president in US history to have all 50 states of the Union simultaneously go bankrupt.

first president in US history to order a US attack and military occupation of a sovereign nation, doing so against the will of the United Nations and the world community.

first president in US history to have the United Nations remove the US from the elections monitoring board.

removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of US congressional oversight than any presidential administration in US history.

first US president to establish a secret US shadow government.

first American president in history who is outwardly hostile to science -- dedicated, as a distinguished, bipartisan panel of educators and scientists (including forty-nine Nobel laureates) has declared, to "the distortion of scientific knowledge for partisan political ends."

Made the Republican Party the first religious party in U.S. history

first American President in history who has effectively lost two wars simultaneously

first American president in history to be labeled an "idiot" by a diplomat of a foreign nation.

first American President in history to lose the popular vote and the Electoral College vote and still be sworn in

first administration in US history to detain an American citizen using only "secret evidence."

first administration in US history to specifically target homosexuals and to thwart the scientific study of sex, research on AIDS, and innumerable other sexual health initiatives

first President appointed by the Supreme Court

Bush is also the only president in US history to be questioned by a commission with his vice president present (9/11 Commission).

Only administration in history to start two wars (three wars, four wars—whatever)

only President in U.S. history to attack a country which did not attack or even threaten to attack us first.

only President in U.S. history to have a negative job. record for 52 months consecutive months in office.

Created the first economic expansion in modern times with no real increase in American wages.

only president in U.S. history to have. led the country into two wars in two years.

President with the lowest IQ.

President with the most feeble resume' going into office.

First president to interpret a rigged election result as a "mandate" and "political capital".

President who is the biggest embarrassment to his already morally bankrupt family.

Worst speech READER in history.

First president who never read and most clearly did not understand the Constitution.

President who appointed the most incompetent a-holes to important positions.

President with the least command of the English, or any other, language.

First president to graduate from Yale with an accent from a Larry McMurtry novel.

First president to be more valuable clearing brush in Texas than at his desk in the White House.

First president to piss on the legacy of his president father.

First president to admit that he did not READ.

President with a nose farthest up the ass of medical, energy, banking, and arms lobbies.

President who lived in the longest psychological state of denial in history.

President with the greatest ability to live in the longest psychological state of denial in history.

Most cowardly-draft-dodging wimp-ass-sissy to ever serve as Commander-in-Chief.

President who most consistently DID NOT listen to advisors HE appointed.

President who awarded the most Medals of Freedom to the most incompetent losers in history.

President who most effectively manipulated the Christian fundamentalists with BS Bible passages.

First president to "sleep fine at night" after killing almost 3,000 American military needlessly.

President who didn't know there are different kind of Arabs.

First president to be less trusted and more hated by more people in the world than Stalin.

President who shit on the Constitution, called it frosting, and got away with it.

First president to prove to be more dangerous and destructive to America than her worst enemies.

[Dont_Bogart_the_Pretzel]

1. Alot of work to be "Numba1"

Edited to add..great list!

[Ilsa]

2. Correction:

"First president to graduate from Yale with a FAKE accent from a Larry McMurtry novel."