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Edited on Sat May-30-09 12:01 AM by chknltl
when I read this earlier today it made me smile anyway. :hi:
I never quite figured out why the > sexual urge of men and > women differ so much. And I never > have figured out the > whole Venus and Mars thing.. I have > never figured out why men think > with their head and > women with their heart. > > FOR EXAMPLE: > One evening last week, my girlfriend > and I were getting into > bed. Well, the passion starts > to heat up, and she > eventually says, 'I don't > feel like it, I just want you > hold me.' > I said, 'WHAT??!! What was > that?!' > So she says the words that every > boyfriend on the planet > dreads to hear... > 'You're just not in touch with > my emotional > needs as a woman > enough for me to satisfy your > physical needs as a > man.' > She responded to my puzzled look by > saying, 'Can't you just > love me for who I am and not what I > do for you in the > bedroom?' > Realizing > that nothing was going to happen > that night, I went to > sleep. > The very next day I opted to take the > day off of work to > spend time with her. We went out to > a nice lunch and > then went shopping at a big, big > unnamed department > store. I walked around with her > while she tried on > several different very expensive > outfits. She couldn't > decide which one to take, so I told > her we'd just buy > them all. She wanted new shoes > to compliment her > new clothes, so I > said, 'Lets get a pair for each > outfit.' > We went on to the jewelry department > where she picked out > a pair of diamond earrings. Let me > tell you... She was > so excited. She must have thought I > was one wave short > of a shipwreck. I started to think > she was testing me > because she asked for a tennis > bracelet when she doesn't > even know how to play tennis. > > I think I threw her for a loop when I > said, 'That's fine, > honey.' She was almost nearing > sexual satisfaction from > all of the excitement. Smiling with > excited anticipation, she finally said, > 'I think this is all > Dear, let's go to the > cashier.' > I could hardly contain myself when I > blurted out, 'No > honey, I don't feel like it.' > Her face just went completely blank as > her jaw dropped with > a baffled, 'WHAT?' > I then said, 'Honey! I just want > you to HOLD this stuff > for a while. You're just not in > touch with my financial > needs as a man enough for me to > satisfy your shopping > needs as a woman.' > And just when she had this look like > she was going to kill > me, I added, 'Why can't you > just love me for who I am > and not for the things I buy > you?' > > Apparently I'm not having sex tonight > either....but tonight I'll sleep better!*
(edited/changed to make the ending less offensive)
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