If a friend of yours got arrested, would you bail them out?

[moriah]

Poll question: If a friend of yours got arrested, would you bail them out?

Got a call tonight, a friend got arrested.

She has a 2 year old kid and is a single mom. Her kid is safe and being taken care of tonight.

It's a failure to appear for shoplifting from a rather well-known retailer. She was stopped at a sobriety checkpoint and they ran her name like they were doing everybody that night, her kid wasn't with her.

Because it is a failure to appear, they are refusing bail via a bondsman -- it's $1000 cash.

...

I've pretty much already made my decision -- I can spare $50 without putting things on credit cards, but I will not take a cash advance to do it. They think she'll be able to get it down to a professional bond requirement in the AM if she goes in front of the judge and pleads about having a kid, and with the $50 they'll have enough to pay a bondsman.

I am trying to find an attorney for her to help with that.

--------

She's a sweet girl, she's been there for me, even though I've never had the taxpayers pay for my photography and fingerprinting before. I did sign for another friend who needed bailed out but it was an odd situation -- he had the cash, they just needed someone to make sure he'd go to court, and he lived across the hall from me. His was a DWI and my husband had been in the car with him, so I had to go pick up my husband and their friend anyway -- of the three of them my friend was the most sober, but that wasn't saying much.

[harmonicon]

1. I wouldn't in this case

This friend of yours already failed to appear once, so chances seem that you'll be out of any money you pony up for this, and a thief isn't too likely to pay you back, especially if they're in prison.

[moriah]

2. I know for a fact I won't get the $50 back, wouldnt ask for it actually.

She's had a lot of financial issues. I buy clothes for her kid, I will do material things, but I don't like giving her cash because she doesn't seem to be responsible with it. In this case she'd probably need to buy diapers or something when she got out, and I would consider the $50 a loss if I put it up for this.

I did my semi-annual buy of clothes for her kid only a week ago -- her and my other god-niece are still too young to really remember what gifts are, so until they can get mad at me for giving them a sweater or some such for Christmas, they're getting clothes and other things like that. Plenty of other people seem to give toys but few seem to think that warm clothing might really be what's needed.

Also, I'm not there to supervise her -- she lives about three hours away. When it was the dude who lived across from me, I knew I could wake him up and drive him to court... actually, I did drive him, but he was already awake, he'd barely slept at all that night. If I KNEW I could make her go to court, I might put it on a card -- but I am not there to do it.

I'm also hesitant to have my name on anything involved in the case because the major retailer is my client, and they are very picky -- I could lose my job if I bailed her out and they saw my name on it.

If I had the budget for clothes for the Palin family, I'd probably do it. But I don't, and I won't put it on credit cards or do a title loan or any of the other options I could do tonight. But if they won't lower her bond or at least put it to a bailable bond tomorrow, we'll see. I'd be happy to take care of her little girl until her court date, and I think the grandparents and the dad in this situation would be cool with that, but if she's in jail for very long she will lose custody I'm pretty sure.

*le sigh*

I got the call while I was asleep, and the first thing I said was "Please tell me this is just a really vivid dream...."

[fizzgig]

3. depends on how good a friend it is

but, if it's one of the few incredibly close friends i have, i would.

[JVS]

4. Not for someone with a failure to appear

[BlueIris]

5. I voted "depending on what it was for." Circumstances would matter. As well as my ability

to pay, of course. A good friend wouldn't ask a friend who didn't have money to help them out, IMO. And I would ask, "Is my assistance really going to help here, or just enable this person to keep fucking up (assuming the friend messed up as opposed to getting arrested by mistake, screwed by another, etc.)?"