Best sports snark you've ever heard?

[Oeditpus Rex]

This one's apocryphal; the names change depending on who's telling it, so I'm just gonna make 'em up. But it's a classic.

The Dodgers and Giants were playing in 1965, and Lou Johnson lined a ball into the seats down the left-field line. A blind man would've known it was foul, but third base ump Augie Donatelli made the call anyway.

When the inning ended, Donatelli happened to look toward the stands where the ball went and saw stadium attendants carrying a woman on a stretcher.

As Junior Gilliam trotted out to play third for the Dodgers, Donatelli asked him, "Did Johnson's foul hit that woman?"

"Nah," Gilliam said. "You called it right, and she fainted."

[SalmonChantedEvening]

1. It's snark of a sort

And it's my favorite baseball story.

In 1966, Bob Eucker was about to be traded to the Phillies, and he was apprehsive at best as far as playing in Philadelphia was concerned. He said it was because of a story he'd been told about an evening at Connie Mack Stadium, where a drunken fan had fallen from the bleachers into the bullpen, a drop of some 30 feet. He stood up and began to walk away, apparently uninjured.

The crowd booed.

[Pierre.Suave]

2. This is sort of sports related...

When I was in Traverse City Michigan years ago for a summer they had this really young guy doing the late night and weekend sports casting.

Anyway, so there he is commenting on a local HS basketball game and says:

"player x went coast to coast like space ghost."

I :rofl:ed

[recoveringdittohed]

3. A bi-lingual snark

Back in 1961 the Cincinnati Reds had a Venezuelan shortstop named Elio Chacon whose command of the English language was limited and a Cuban coach named Reggie Otero with much better bilingual skills. The story is that one day an umpire made a questionable call adverse to Chacon and the Reds and Chacon went into a tirade in Spanish. The umpire asked Otero "did he just call me what I think he called me" and Otero replied "Oh no, he doesn't know enough English to call you what you are" and with that the umpire threw Otero out of the game.

[Oeditpus Rex]

8. That reminds me of another one

Can't remember all the details, but Orlando Cepeda was having a feud with some pitcher and one day — this was around 1961 — he homered off him. As Cepeda rounded second, the pitcher yelled something at him like "You don't even speak good English!"

Cepeda yelled back, "Kiss my ass, you cocksucker! Is that good enough English for you?"



Note on Chacon: He became rather famous with the Mets for picking a fight with Willie Mays after Mays slid hard into him at second. Mays said of it, "He started beating on me with his fists, so I picked him up and dropped him into short center field."

[Drum]

4. Here's one from last night:

OP by greenbriar:
start your Kobe fueled excuses here
"My team mates didn't show up to play"

Reply #1 by HughMoran
Mine did!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=215x71731

:rofl:

[GOPisEvil]

5. Back when Bob Horner was a Brave...

...he scored on single after much huffing and puffing. Over the replay Pete Van Wieren (I think) mentioned that Bob Horner had deceptive speed. Skip Caray replied, "Yeah, he's slower than he looks."

[driver8]

11. Ha Ha -- now that's funny!!

We had a guy on our work softball team like that. We called him "The Winnebago"...

[Zavulon]

6. Shannon Sharpe was commenting on the SD Chargers during a pregame show last year, and

he was commenting on the Chargers' lousy start under Norv Turner. Recalling that the previous year saw Marty Schottenheimer getting fired for a playoff loss after a 14-2 regular season, Sharpe said "They replaced a guy who couldn't win in the playoffs with a guy who can't win in the regular season."

[Zavulon]

7. Tommy Lasorda's "opinion of Kingman's performance."

I assume I don't have to explain that one to a Dodger fan. :D

Sincerely,

Your pal Zavulon, the guy with the defunct team as his avatar ;)

[Oeditpus Rex]

10. Classic Lasorda rant

Thanks for the reminder. :D

[Magrittes Pipe]

9. Here's a couple:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uv23pqH9iG0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YKxf3OkpJc

[Oeditpus Rex]

12. ROFL!

That bit with Weaver is hiLARious! :rofl:

[Carnea]

13. In Tampa Bays earlier years coach McKay was asked what he thought of the offenses execution...

He said he was in favor of it.

[bumblebee1]

14. Here's one I came up with.

Thie is while I was living in the LA area. Mike Piazza was the catcher for the Dodgers. He couldn't throw out baserunners to save his life. I made this comment to my husband:

Mike Piazza couldn't throw Strom Thurmond out as a base runner.