I'm sick of these seven and eight year old criminals running free in our schools...so here's my idea

[Danger Mouse]

Set up a kid-sized electric chair in every school and call it 'Lil Sparky'
Now when a kid draws a picture of a gun, we don't have to bother with just suspension. Zero tolerance MEANS zero tolerance. Introduce him to 'Lil Sparky' and I can guarantee that little bastard will never draw another gun.
Additionally, he will never draw another breath.
With his vicious and dangerous drawing of a deadly gun, we can tell that he is clearly a future mass-murderer or liberal, and thus he is best removed from the general populace before he has the chance to do harm.
Kids fighting on the playground? Give em the chair. Kids mouthing off to you? Give em the chair. No homework completed? Time for the chair.
As an added bonus, frequent use of 'Lil Sparky' will greatly reduce school populations, thereby making overcrowding in schools a thing of the past! You can even make an extracurricular activity out of it...have a Junior Informants Club and an Execution Squad? Who gets to wear the black hood THIS month?
It's about time we took Zero Tolerance to the next level. After all, no price to pay is too small to protect our children, right?
...right?

[Orrex]

1. Alternative name suggestion

Short Circuit.

Otherwise, your suggestion sounds commendably reasonable. We should fry one or two as an example even if no transgressions occur. Got to keep them in their place, after all.

[Danger Mouse]

2. I am thinking only of the safety of our children.

The best way to keep them safe is to further criminalize their behavior. Make sure they learn at as young an age as possible, how truly insane and broken the system is!
...right before we turn them into barbecue, naturally.

[fizzgig]

3. and hold a school assembly each time

make those little bastards watch what happens when they step outta line

[Danger Mouse]

5. oh, of course. do away with ISS and detention and replace it with Death Row, Jr.!

i should stop this, before i give these twisted assholes that run school districts these days any free ideas

[fizzgig]

7. i'm sure this isn't a new thought to some of them

[BarenakedLady]

4. Step away from my children...

Slowly...very slowly...

Don't make me go all Mother Bear on your ass!

*poke*

My son is going to be the Scream guy (complete with dripping blood mask and a sickle) for Halloween. My oldest daughter is the Grim Reaper with a 4 foot scythe. My youngest is a cute kitteh (heehee).

[Danger Mouse]

6. i can definitely tell that they are YOUR kids...

dripping blood mask? eugh.
sounds awesome.
in 2004, when i was in pep band...i dressed up for halloween for to do band carolling.
you don't want to know what i dressed up as.
seriously, you don't.

[BarenakedLady]

8. Seriously

I SOOOOO do.

:D

[Danger Mouse]

9. Ed Gein...

complete with 'human skin' mask which i made by cutting pieces off of a shrivelled old hag's mask...making it look pretty convincing as a skin mask.
:hide:

[BarenakedLady]

10. Oh dear.

:rofl:

[fizzgig]

11. how in the hell is it that i've never heard this story?

i might just have to run away screaming

[The Straight Story]

12. Since they are going to kill anyway, let's give em guns and birth control

:rofl:

[Danger Mouse]

15. Heretic! How dare you!

[laylah]

13. I LIKE

how you think! :rofl:

[Danger Mouse]

14. would you like to subscribe to my newsletter?

:evilgrin: