ARRRRGH - I want to go out and tell off this fundie loon outside my office

[ET Awful]

trying to preach to a co-worker. She's driving me batshit.

[lildreamer316]

1. Breathe.....slowly...

I know it's hard to deal with...

[LostinVA]

2. Go invite them to "your" Winter Solstice rite

I'm serious! giggle...

[China_cat]

3. You could always start singing

Gimme that old time religion:

We will hoist a mighty flagon To Our Lady of Ephesians
To the honor of ol' Dagon Who has taps for all secretions
And we won't go on the wagon We will dance like Polynesians
Which is good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!

(Chorus)
Gimme that Old Time Religion!
Gimme that Old Time Religion!
Gimme that Old Time Religion!
It's good enough for me!

I'll sing some songs to Lilith, We will have a mighty orgy
Not so young, and not so girlish, in the honour of Astarte
and She's always PMS-ish, it'll be a mighty party
but She's good enough for me! and it's good enough for me!
(Chorus)

Lilith wears a lacy nightie We will sing to Lady Isis
And She is a little flighty She'll stand by us in a crisis
She will get you all excite-y And She hasn't raised Her prices
She's wet-dream enough for me! And She's good enough for me!
(Chorus)

We will all bow down to Dagon We will all bow down to Enlil
A conservative old pagan We will all bow down to Enlil
He still votes for Ronald Reagan Pass your Cup and get a refill!
And that's good enough for me! With bold Gilgamesh the Brave!
(Chorus)

Let us worship sweet Eninni Oh the ancient goddess Nerthus
Let us worship sweet Eninni From herself the Earth did birth us
In a skimpy string bikini And I wonder: are we worth us?
And that's good enough for me! But she's good enough for me!
(Chorus)

With Inanna don't try flirtin' She got eager for Dimuzi
To your freedom she'll say "Curtain!" Said she'd meet him up by Nuzi
'Cause she finds it most impertin- Now he's taking quite a snooze, he
Ent tosay "She don't suit me!" Might revive next century!
(Chorus)

We will go to worship Lillith Well Dimuzi's on vacation
Grab your cup, step up and fill it He'll be back when spring awakens
Tho 'ware she don't make you spill it! There will be such recreation
And that's good enough for me! There will be enough for me!
(Chorus)

Oh the Phillistines abound We will all bow down to Moloch
Oh the Phillistines abound We will all bow down to Moloch
They had the biggest Baals around 'Cause his Pope is not a Polack
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
(Chorus)

If you want to save your soul, ac- I'll let Moloch light my fire
-Cording to the priests of Moloch Of his worship I won't tire
You must sacrifice a Polack Cheapest baby-sitter's hire....
And that's good enough for me! And that's cheap enough for me!
(Chorus)

We will bow down to Astarte We will go and weep for Tammuz
And we'll have a great big party And we'll laugh at Springtime's promise
And your welcome will be hearty And a few then will be mommas
And that's good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
(Chorus)

We will bow down to the Goddess When we gather with Astarte
As She wears Her Cretan bodice It will be a lovely party
And the women cry "Come prod us!" And the lovin' will be hearty
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
(Chorus)

We will all go worship Rimmon We will go and worship Baal
All us Pagan men and women For he is the Lord of All
And our goblets will be brimmin' In the fields and in the hall
And that's good enough for me! He is good enough for me!
(Chorus)

Let's go for temple prostitution We will build Baal up an altar
It's an ancient institution In our duty we'll not falter
That provides a quick solution And we'll drink our barley malt-er
For horniness in you and me! And that's drunk enough for me!
(Chorus)

Erishkigal was a vixen
But when Nergal got her mixin'
Socially, she soon was fixin'
His connubiality!
(Chorus)

More at http://www.iit.edu/~phillips/personal/song/old_asat.html

[XemaSab]

4. Wow....

I don't know what to say, just... wow.

:D

[pokerfan]

5. I love that song

First heard it on a Pete Seger album. One of those zipper songs where people can make up their own verses, like the limerick song.


In the church of Aphrodite
She's a mighty righteous sightie,
The Priestess wears a see through nightie
And she's good enough for me


Shall we sing a verse for Venus,
Of the Gods she is the meanest,
Cause she bit me on my...elbow!
And it's good enough for me!


We will worship with Poseidon
We will meet him when the tide's in
All the maidens he will ride in
Then he'll give 'em all to me! Let us dance with Dionysus


Let us dance with Dionysus
And get drunk on wine and spices
The Christians call them "vices"
But they're good enough for me!


We will all bow down to Venus
As we dance upon Mt. Zenos
We will worship with our....voice
And that's good enough for me!


It's the Fundie Right's solution
To put Christian absolution
In the U.S. Constitution
And that don't sit well with me!


Whene'er I hear Jerry Falwell
Quite soon I don't feel at all well
Throw him down a sacrificial well
That'll be good enough for me!



670 more verses here: http://www.ladybridget.com/mp/song_otr.html

[ET Awful]

6. WoooHooo :)

Who was I joking about with this song earlier? Cat Woman maybe? I forget :P