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$25.00 BOUNTY To The DUer Who "Off's" Evita (The Songbird Killer Cat)

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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 06:42 PM
Original message
$25.00 BOUNTY To The DUer Who "Off's" Evita (The Songbird Killer Cat)
Edited on Sun Sep-11-05 06:50 PM by matcom
That's right. $25.00 paid in CASH (in 25 $1 unmarked bills) to the DUer who will successfully rid the bird-kingdom of this unwanted terrorist.

no strings. the Pelt from this vile beast is the only proof necessary.

Ladies & Gentlemen...... TO THE HUNT!!
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 06:49 PM
Response to Original message
1. I b'lieve you've just declared a catwah
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GOPisEvil Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 06:49 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. *snort*
:popcorn:
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WCGreen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:00 PM
Response to Reply #1
10. Thak is really fucking funny
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yvr girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:10 PM
Response to Reply #1
16. That is fabulous
:applause:
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progmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 06:50 PM
Response to Original message
3. OMG
Edited on Sun Sep-11-05 06:50 PM by progmom
She's going to...OMG...I don't even know what she's going to do. But...


:popcorn:


edited to add: :rofl:
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 06:51 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. could be interesting
:D
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El Fuego Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 06:52 PM
Response to Original message
5. Hey, it is just birdie Darwinism!
Evita is just culling the flock of the slow, dimwitted songbirds! The smart birdies survive to pass on their smarter-than-pussycat genes.
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 06:55 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. Personally, I'm thinking she's
trying to save Lynnesin and Abbie from any potential exposure to the dreaded bird flu.
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DeposeTheBoyKing Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 06:56 PM
Response to Original message
7. I'm no catkiller
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 06:58 PM
Response to Original message
8. MATCOM!!!!!
How dare you harm my Evita. We just spent the last 15 minutes snuggling while I brushed her fur.

I ask this to you, my fellow DUers - does this look like a cold-blooded killer???

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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 06:59 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. the answer to your question is a resounding YES
cold.blooded.killer.

fucking MANSON i tells ya!

BBBBBBBBBUUUUUURRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNNNN HHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRR!
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:01 PM
Response to Reply #9
11. Just for that I'm bringing Evita to your place!!!
And have her off all of Mrs. Matcom's songbirds!
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:02 PM
Response to Reply #11
12. i beg you to do it
just laid out the POISON

mmmmmmmuuuuuwwwwaaaaaahhhaaaaa
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:04 PM
Response to Reply #12
13. YOU WOULD NOT
that poison would also kill the songbirds anyway

Mrs. Matcom would have you sleeping in the dog house all week and I know the size of your dog.
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:05 PM
Response to Reply #13
14. don't be so sure
Mrs Matcom LOVES her songbirds

LOVES them

and OUR cats do NOT have access to them because we are RESPONSIBLE cat-owners :D
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:08 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. Evita is a total indoor cat - she's just extremely smart
Smart enough to figure her way to get a paw outside to nab a songbird

I kid you not - Evita never goes outside!
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:11 PM
Response to Reply #15
17. cats should NEVER be smarter than their owners
you will now be assimilated. :D
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:13 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. Yes but I've outsmarted the smart one
She can't figure out how to get the big jug of Tide Detergent off the inside window ledge that is blocking her bird access.

She's a smart cat but she still has limits.

And Matcom dear, if you ever met dear Evita you'd fall in love with her. She's just the most adorable dainty 8lb grey cat you could ever find
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:14 PM
Response to Reply #18
19. if i ever meet Evita...
i'll rip out her spine
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 07:16 PM
Response to Reply #19
20. I don't think she has a spine
she's real flexible. I pick her up she's practically without a backbone, which explains how she manages to catch the damn songbird in the first place
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 05:35 AM
Response to Reply #8
24. um.............actually LynneSin
it does
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progmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 06:52 AM
Response to Reply #24
25. i agree
:rofl:
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 07:31 AM
Response to Reply #24
26. Stop saying that or I'LL HAVE TO KICK YOUR ASS
:D

This morning that precious cat jumped up on my bed and gave me a wakeup call. She really is adorable when she wants to be!!
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 09:31 AM
Response to Reply #26
33. not that she isn't a looker
but be honest, she would fit quite easily in with this felon feline lineup:
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CatWoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 10:00 AM
Response to Reply #33
34. LOLOLOL
HEY!!

Leave my brood out of this!!!

Crack, yes, but they draw the line at smoking bird guts :D
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 10:02 AM
Response to Reply #34
35. If you're brood could get ahold of a bird
the bird would be toast in 5 minutes flat!
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sasquatch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 11:06 PM
Response to Original message
21. $25 wouldn't even pay for the trip out to do the hit
$1000 is my minimmum.
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Missy Vixen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-11-05 11:24 PM
Response to Original message
22. Sorry to be a humorless cat owner
but Evita needs a good breakaway collar with a bell on it. She will have bagged her last songbird after being fitted with one.

IMHO, YMMV.

Julie
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 05:14 AM
Response to Reply #22
23. Actually she doesn't - I need to plug up the hole
She's totally indoors and if I put a bell on her I'll have to listen to that bell all night long. I have enough problems with sleep as it is.

A temporary solution has been made with the laundry detergent sitting in front of the space where she was able to reach out and snag a bird. Plus the cats aren't allowed in my bedroom when I'm at work.

She's crafty but the birds should be safe for now!
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Deja Q Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 07:37 AM
Response to Original message
27. I'm not having sex with a bird! That's gross!
:wow:

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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 08:18 AM
Response to Reply #27
28. i'll bet the bird isn't fond of you either
:D
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 08:19 AM
Response to Reply #28
29. This thread is turning into a sex thread
I'm gonna demand that it be locked!!!

(anyhow gotta protect my precious Evita)
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bertha katzenengel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 08:22 AM
Response to Original message
30. I will hunt her down and let her live - I will add her to my stable!
:bounce:
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 08:23 AM
Response to Reply #30
31. NOOOO, you're gonna kidnap Evita!!!
Actually, she probably would like that - I think she'd like living outdoors again but in my community it's not a good thing
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bertha katzenengel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 08:37 AM
Response to Reply #31
32. I'd keep her in, thus saving her from the wild mob of DU cat killers!
And you can come and visit any time. :7
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-12-05 11:12 AM
Response to Original message
36. C'MON PEOPLE! This $25 is just BURNING a hole in my pocket!
:bounce:
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sasquatch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-13-05 09:40 AM
Response to Reply #36
37. I gave you my estimate, SO TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT PAL!!
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-13-05 09:43 AM
Response to Reply #37
38. how about $25 and...
my wife :D
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sasquatch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-13-05 09:47 AM
Response to Reply #38
39. That cat is deader than Terri Schivo
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-13-05 09:48 AM
Response to Reply #39
40. YAY!
guess i better let her know :D
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sasquatch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-13-05 09:49 AM
Response to Reply #40
41. LOL
:rofl:
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BikeWriter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-13-05 09:52 AM
Response to Reply #38
43. Shit, the topic is too old to recommend. :-(
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-13-05 09:50 AM
Response to Reply #36
42. Send me the $25 and I'll send you an envelope full of grey hair
the way Evita sheds I could probably make a fake pelt and pawn it off on Matcom for the money!
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