The Gratuitous Monty Python and the Holy Grail Quoting Thread

[Chichiri]

WHAT...is your name?

WHAT...is your quest?

WHAT...is the capital of Assyria?

[northzax]

1. what...is your name?

What...is your quest?

what...is your favourite colour?

[Burma Jones]

2. Good Idea oh Lord

'Course it's a Good Idea

[Chichiri]

3. There are some who call me . . .

Tim?

[Dhalgren]

4. Run away! Run away!

[deutsey]

5. I'm not dead yet.

[Deep13]

52. You're not fooling anyone, you know.

[Jokerman]

6. Help Help, I being repressed!

See the violence inherent in the system!

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

7. She turned me into a newt!

It got better...

[mr_hat]

8. Oh, wicked, bad, naughty Zoot!

[crispini]

11. And after the spanking....

the ORAL SEX!

[WhollyHeretic]

37. Sir Lancelot: We were in the nick of time. You were in great peril.

Sir Galahad: I don't think I was.
Sir Lancelot: Yes, you were. You were in terrible peril.
Sir Galahad: Look, let me go back in there and face the peril.
Sir Lancelot: No, it's too perilous.
Sir Galahad: Look, it's my duty as a knight to sample as much peril as I can.
Sir Lancelot: No, we've got to find the Holy Grail. Come on.
Sir Galahad: Oh, let me have just a little bit of peril?
Sir Lancelot: No. It's unhealthy.
Sir Galahad: I bet you're gay.
Sir Lancelot: No, I'm not.

[crispini]

9. 'Ow can you tell 'e's a king?

'E hasn't got shit on him!

[SixStrings]

10. Who are you so wise in the ways of science?

[Ezlivin]

12. It's only a flesh wound

N/T

[peekaloo]

13. I fart in your general direction!

[mark11727]

14. Bring out yer dead!

I don't want to go on the cart!

[name not needed]

15. I don't want to talk to you no more,

you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

[ms liberty]

16. Oh, yes, it's just a bunny...

[Twillig]

28. One rabbit stew comin' right up!

[El Fuego]

17. Bring me a shrubbery!!!!!

[El Fuego]

18. Ni!!

[AllegroRondo]

48. Who are you, who would say "NI" to an old woman?

[El Fuego]

53. We are the knights who say "Ni"!!!!

[MissMillie]

19. That's no ordinary rabbit!

Eeet's a Keeeeeller!

[crispini]

26. With big sharp nasty teeth!

[The Blue Flower]

20. Was that an African swallow?

Or a European?

[Chichiri]

22. What . . . I don't know that!!

AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!

[mac56]

21. "One day, lad, all this will be yours!"

"What, the curtains?"

[NoPasaran]

23. "She's got enormous...

Tracts of land"

[AlGore-08.com]

24. Let's not bicker over who killed who...

eom

[flvegan]

25. Pitchez le vache!

Now go away or I will taunt you for a second time.

[Pert_UK]

50. I always thought it was "fetchez la vache".......

What do I know?

P.

[Pert_UK]

51. Who are you who are so wise in the ways of science?

:evilgrin:

P.

[phaseolus]

27. Listen...

... Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony. ... you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you! ... I mean, if I went 'round saying I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away! ... Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system... Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help! Help! I'm being repressed!

[Initech]

29. What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

African or European?

[sakabatou]

36. "I don't know that!... AHHHH!"

[edbermac]

30. A moose once bit my sister...

[gmoney]

31. Where did you get those coconuts? (n/t)

[Rainbowreflect]

32. And it looks hopeless for our brave heroes when suddenly...

[Yavin4]

33. ARTHUR: " Well, I AM king"

DENNIS: Oh king, eh, very nice. An' how'd you get that, eh? By
exploitin' the workers -- by 'angin' on to our outdated imperialist
dogma which perpetuates the economic an' social differences in our
society! If there's ever going to be any progress--

[Yavin4]

34. DENNIS: Well you can't expect to wield supreme executive power

DENNIS: I mean, if I went around sayin' I was an emperor just
because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they'd
put me away!
ARTHUR: Shut up! Will you shut up!
DENNIS: Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system.
ARTHUR: Shut up!
DENNIS: Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system!
HELP! HELP! I'm being repressed!


A comedy written in the late 60s accurately describes the political climate of America in 2005!

[Avalux]

35. "we have brought you shrubbery!"

Ni Ni Ni!!

[gmoney]

38. Now you must chop down the mightiest tree in the forest...

WIIIIIITTHH... A HERRING!

[MN ChimpH8R]

39. Castles and swamps

"I built this kingdom up from nothing. When I started here, all there was was swamp. Other kings said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built it all the same, just to show 'em. It sank into the swamp. So, I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. So I built a third one. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one stayed up! And that's what you're gonna get, lad: the strongest castle in these islands."

Sounds like Chimpy! :rofl:

[Chichiri]

40. Must be a king.

Hasn't got shit all over him.

[chaska]

41. ...then the oral sex.

[chaska]

42. Maybe I could stay a bit longer.

[sldavis]

43. Your mother was a hamster...

and your father smelled of elderberries!

[chaska]

44. How do you know he's king? He's the only one ain't got shit all over 'im.

[On the Road]

45. "your mother was a hampster and your father smelled of elderberries!!!"

[Strawman]

46. His head smashed in and his heart cut out and his liver removed

and his bowels unplugged
and his nostrils raped
and his bottom burned off
and his penis...

[Scruffbunny]

47. One, two five! (three sir!) THREE!

Sir Robin met up with the other knights. There was much rejoicing.
Yay.
They ran out of food and had to eat sir Robin's minstrels. And there was much rejoicing.
YAYAYAYAYAY!

[Scruffbunny]

49. She turned me into a newt!

I got better...

[Deep13]

54. Five is right out.

[Deep13]

55. This is supposed to be a happy time.

Let's not bicker and argue over who killed whom.