Let us now discuss-BRUSSEL SPROUTS

[underpants]

One of the few universal moments of American (or Western) life is the shared experience of repulsion and horror upon our first bite of a brussel sprout. Passed on from generation to generation is the sadistic parental habit of forcing this evil upon the young. It is however a uniting shared experience that sets the bar for the worst of life's experienced that is the instantaneous mark for disgust, pain, and victimization to compare with all that follows.


No discussion of the evil that are brussel sprouts would be complete without mentioning their 800 pound gorilla cousin-cabbage. Served cold, such as cole slaw, the cabbage is a useful and productive member of the food civilization but joining the list of toxic relationships to be avoided at all costs (oil/water, Republicans/YOUR money, Pennsylvanians/the interstate highway system) is cabbage and heat. When combined these two normally benign elements create a stench that causes mortals eye popping fear. My own mother eventually had to put her foot down and demand that my stepfather's slow assault on our senses with a crock pot and a head of cabbage be banned to the back porch though I am still not sure what was worse-fleeing from this acrid smell IN the house or the horror that awaited us on those hot humid coastal summer nights in our septic take dominated backyard. My mother, brave women that she is, at once provided a safe haven for her family but at the same time created an unholy battlefield of two devastating biological weapons. Looking back this must have been another universal shared experience as all the kids in our neighborhood played in the street not in the backyards and why you always see basketball hoops in the FRONT yard in the mid-Atlantic region.

But again I think it all goes back to the brussel sprout.

[trotsky]

1. Spare the Brussels sprouts! Send them to me!

Steamed, drenched in butter... MMMMMMMMM.

[da_chimperor]

4. Not too much butter though, and some salt and pepper.

Damn good eatin'! And they're really good for you.

[trotsky]

6. Mother nature's bounty, wrapped in a tiny package.

Far from being the spawn of Satan, Brussels sprouts cause Satan to cower in fear with their delicious goodness. :)

[da_chimperor]

14. I liked them as a kid, but then I like most everything except asparagus

I LOVE it now, and I can't even think of how I didn't like it as a kid.

[underpants]

7. I knew there would at least one of YOU in this crowd

apparently there are more than one.

[trotsky]

11. Don't be hatin' cuz I got good taste!

;-)

[da_chimperor]

16. Brussel sprout hater! You and matcom

:P

[underpants]

22. Guilty as charged

:P

[ET Awful]

34. Yup, delicious :)

Also good with bacon bits sprinkled over the top :).

[donheld]

56. Yum, they are very good that way

:9

[matcom]

2. In 100% agreement!

i once sat for 3 HOURS at the family dinner table in one of those sadistic mother/torture moments staring at those little vile bastards on my plate. the smell from them wafting into my tiny nostrils, eating away at my brain. x(

i blame any instances of brain damage or behavioral problems on those 3 horrific hours to this very day

[LynneSin]

9. Matcom - you've been warped since birth

stop trying to make excuses and blaming the Brussel Sprout

[underpants]

10. They were just sittin' there lookin' at ya weren't they?

Evil little bahstads

Very funny vegetation from vegatables

[Bunny]

3. They are the Devil's work.

Satan walks among us. Leaving a trail of Brussels sprouts in his vile wake.

[underpants]

23. "Baby Boomers" were able to break the vicious Castor Oil cycle

perhaps some future generation will unite to heed the call to end the Brussel Sprout cycle.

I, for one, plan to continue the brussel sprout tradition at least once with our child (knock on wood) much in the same way that I got my wife to take a big slug of something I told her was surprisingly delicous-soy milk....hilarity ensued.

[Bunny]

24. You're a scamp, underpants!

I won't inflict B. sprouts on my kids, at least not yet. But I'll get the little pretties someday...:evilgrin:

[Kathy in Cambridge]

5. When they cook, they smell like farts

:puke:

Nasty critters!

[LynneSin]

8. I juiced cabbage this morning: Red & Green

My morning juice:

Cabbage
Red Cabbage
Carrots
Broccoli
Beetroot
Spinach
Parsley
and an apple to sweeten it up a little bit.

All I can say is thank goodness I can chug because that was just the nastiest drink. But it's chocked full of vitamins & nutrients so who can complain.

BTW - Brussel Sprouts are suppose to be a great addition for juicing!

[underpants]

12. I'm gonna have to take your word on that one

When I am on a health kick I usually get a thing of V-8 juice and force myself to down a small glass every morning. Taking one for the team.

[LynneSin]

17. But V8 is so processed

Juicing is basically taking otherwise horribly tasting but heathy vegetables and putting them in a format that is somewhat tolerable. I will probably never eat 75% of the vegetables that I juice hence - that's is why I'm juicing them.

[underpants]

20. Quick and easy like a band-aid

If I had to stand there and make it there is no way I would end up drinking it.

BTW- there is currently an orange juice ad where the guy juices a salmon and some other things. My wife wretches every time it comes on.

[orleans]

61. omg! sorry--but it sounds horrible!

like a does of poison!

my advice: take a couple vitamins, have a salad for dinner, an orange at lunch, and a cup of coffee for breakfast

(life is too short for me to have to suffer through that misery every morning--i hate getting up as it is)

[auntAgonist]

13. LOVE them!

[El Fuego]

15. Such blatant flamebait!!! Where are the Mods?!?

OK only kidding. As for brussel sprouts, you can pretty much kill the vegetable taste with massive amounts of butter and salt. That's my modus operandi with all vegetables, it actually makes them edible.

[underpants]

18. So then, why eat them at all?

If you have to kill their flavor why not have something you like the taste of like corn or greenbeans?

[El Fuego]

26. OK good point.

But I'd rather eat brussel sprouts than green beans anyday. YUK!

I would never make it as a vegan.

[mondo joe]

55. The best recipes don't kill the flavor at all. Here's what I like:

Shred them (on a mandolin or with a food processor) - saute them pretty quickly in a bit olive oil or butter, add lemon salt and pepper. Delicious.

Nothing to mask the flavor.

Most people overcook brussel sprouts, I assume because by the time the middle is cooked the outside is overdone.

Shred them or even just halve them and they cook better, for a shorter time, and better flavor.

[liberalitch]

19. AAAAAHHHhhhh the veal of veggies...

They are mini- cabbages..... they are kept small and tender by being kept in a dark box and forbidden to run and play.

Don't eat veal.... don't eat Brussel Sprouts evil apples from the same tree!

[underpants]

21. I knew it!

LOL very funny.

[nookiemonster]

25. CHEESE

and lots of it. Mmmmmmmm.

[underpants]

28. Yes Cheese must have cheese

I got an inspiration for cheese covered peanuts the other day. I wonder if they would sell.

[trotsky]

30. Nuts 'n' Gum

Homer: I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me -- no matter how dumb my suggestions are.

[bif]

27. Thumbs up!

I love 'em.

[mondo joe]

29. Exquisite, sliced very thin, sauteed quickly in butter w a bit of lemon

My neighbor would labor over them on her mandolin - I just throw them in the food processor with the slice-blade.

Perfection.

[peekaloo]

31. Cook 'em in chicken broth with green onions!

Good eatin'!

[underpants]

35. Begone with thee, sprout!

Don't blame me I didn't say it Fudge Stripe did

[fudge stripe cookays]

32. They are the most ...

disgusting item in the produce section.

When I left my mother's home, I was secure in the fact that I would NEVER, EVER have to eat another Brussels sprout.

Begone with thee, sprout!
FSC

[Bonhomme Richard]

33. They make me gag just smelling them cook. n/t

[Schema Thing]

36. Brussel Sprouts are not bad if pureed...

and drank suspended at 2 parts per million in a very high quality tequila.

[underpants]

40. BEST RECIPE YET!!!

:beer: :thumbsup:

[MissMillie]

37. I love 'em

little cabbages.... butter and salt. Quite tasty

[immoderate]

38. Brussel sprouts are as bad as you say...

But I can stick up for the cabbage, because it can take on myriad personna. It can be disguised and flavored, rehabilitated and integrated into useful food groups. You mention slaw, and I also think of sauerkraut. Yes many foods can be rescued by pickling. And who wants a naked hot dog?

And my grandmother was capable of stuffing cabbage with such good things or even making it into a soup, which was eaten with rye bread that had raw garlic rubbed on the crust. I know, hard to believe.

--IMM

[underpants]

41. rehabilitated? No they must be PUNISHED!!!

Oh sorry I just had a rightwing moment.

Very funny.

[immoderate]

43. I said that cabbage can be rehabilitated.

Brussel sprouts are too far over the edge. Recently a friend prepared a dish which had pureed Brussel sprouts. And she said, "Oh they're good this way, just like mashed potatoes."

Well it LOOKED like mashed potatoes so I tasted it. AAUURRRGGGHHHH!!!
Tasted just like, er, like, well Brussel sprouts. Ptoooeyy!

--IMM

[underpants]

45. I apologize for misquoting you

on this important topic.

Point taken.

:bounce:

[immoderate]

46. OK, but you're on mighty thin ice now...

You know what happens to misquoters...

On edit: just look at all the trouble these people suggest one go through to ake those Brussels Sprouts edible. (Not that it helps.)

--IMM

[underpants]

48. post #18 So then, why eat them at all?

I just finished off a bag of Dorito's. Now if I had to I could probably make the bag taste good but really what is the point?

[immoderate]

50. I'm with you there.

And not to beat a dead horse, all that just makes them edible (to some,) not taste good.

:emoticon of dead horse being beaten:

--IMM

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

39. mmmm...pan fried with port balsamic reduction...yummy

[mondo joe]

53. Yup - or butter and lemon

I wonder if you mean sprouts that shredded fine, or at least halved.

I think the biggest obstacle for most people is that if you cook the brussel sprout whole they're easy to overcook (though a good cook can pan fry them whole successfully).

[giant_robot]

42. I'll bet you're just a victim of nasty birds-eye frozen sprouts.

I'll bet if you tasted my braised fresh brussel sprouts with a light butter sauce and a hint of nutmeg, even you would be converted to the way of the sprout.

[crispini]

44. YUMMY!

My fave! With plenty of butter!

Cabbage, OTOH, I can take or leave.

[Nikia]

47. My sister and I both love brussels sprouts

With butter and cheddar cheese.

[mr blur]

49. The Prince of Vegetables!

Better even than broccoli

[bleedingheart]

51. I have had them cooked with a honey sauce...Divine!

I love em...I will peel them and eat them...

[SOteric]

52. They're really Martian heads.

I know you think that's cheese sauce, but it's actually the by-product of a massacre.

My brother told me this when I was just a wee tyke. I haven't choked and gagged one down since.

[underpants]

62. That is too funny

but I will start spreading it around thanks

[Left Is Write]

54. There are plenty of yummy, tasty vegetables out there.

I have no need to get cozy with a Brussels sprout.

[NV Whino]

57. It's Brussels (with 3 esses and a cap B) sprouts n/t

[yellowdogintexas]

58. Divine little green globes, now I think I know what I will have to eat!

I cut them in half, steam them briefly and put butter, salt and pepper on them, lemon juice if I happen to have any.

What makes them bad is overcooking them!!!!! Which my grandmother and mother were pretty good at doing; it is difficult to time them just right if they are being boiled, so I steam them.

another good way to eat them is to fry up a little bacon, and mix up the bacon drippings with some vinegar and brown sugar. Pour this "dressing" over the steamed sprouts and sprinkle the bacon bits on top HEAVEN.

I am going to have to try the thin slice/saute method sometime. Sounds good.

This actually made me want to go eat.


And they actually grow on a tall stalk, not in the dark!!!!!

[slackmaster]

59. My mother forced me to eat them as a child

I've never really gotten over the trauma.

[elshiva]

60. I LOVE brussel sprouts.