10 Ways to Know If You Have PMS

[greeneyedpookie]

#1 Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
#2 You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelette.
#3 The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
#4 Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
#5 Your using your cellular phone to dial up every bumpersticker that says, "How's my driving- call 1-800-***-****.
#6 Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
#7 You're convinced there's a God and he's male.
#8 You're counting down the days until menopause.
#9 You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
#10 The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.

GEP

[Krupskaya]

1. Carb-free diet?

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, CARB-FREE DIET???

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

2. That list is so true for me ...

Especially #1 - I always think everyone hates me or everyone is mad at me lol .

[Pithlet]

5. Me, too, except the opposite.

I'm mad at everyone.

[sendero]

10. They do and they are....

... but they'll get over it in a few days

[DoBotherMe]

3. LOL Here!

When my ex-husband would ask me "is it time for your period?" I would yell, "that has nothing to do with it, it's YOU!" Poor guy.

[aquart]

11. My ex-boyfriend said he always knew.

I would turn and look at him with hatred.

Did anyone else have fantasies of blood spurting from people's necks? Just wondered.

[Ellen Forradalom]

12. Oh, that's a big no-no

That and saying, "You're looking a little fat in the can." No wonder he's your ex.

[Endangered Specie]

4. "Red Alert!"

I used to yell at girls when they had their period, got me slapped once.

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

7. You are lucky you got just a slap :)

It could have been much worse . She or whoever slapped you could have used you as a scratching pad / punching bag / kick dummy . You name it . BTW , for me males are my worse enemy during that time .

[Endangered Specie]

8. But we were friends, and usually, we joked at eached others

expense, but, I guess she was in a really bad mood that day. She slapped me more than once, usually playfully, but that one had a little power behind it

[MuseRider]

6. This is how I know

my husbands eyes are bugging out, his tongue is out and his lips are blue. I suddenly discover my hands are around his throat. Usually it is because he left the toilet seat up again! Good list, I can relate.

[greeneyedpookie]

9. My fav is

#9. I work around all men and the only other woman is the owner and not there all the time. I swear, they are out to get around that "lovely" time!

GEP

[Krupskaya]

13. Also...

You are horny as a dog, then either burst into tears when your partner touches you or you scream, "Get your fucking hands off me!" Or both.