Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login
Google

So...any advice for a soon-to-be candidate's wife?

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread
This topic is archived.
Home » Discuss » Archives » General Discussion (Through 2005) Donate to DU
 
eyesroll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 10:12 AM
Original message
So...any advice for a soon-to-be candidate's wife?
Yep...my husband is running for Congress.
(Am I allowed to post the details in P&C once he gets a press release?)

Has anyone ever been in this position? Anything I need to know to avoid dooming his candidacy or becoming a Stepford Wife?

(I do not look good in pink.)

To be realistic, he's running in Wisconsin's 5th, against a moderate Dem for the primary, eventually for Sensenbrenner's seat. So, really, as a long shot, my husband has nothing to lose. Can the same be said for me? (I'm cool with being a Washington Wife, even if I stay here, but I'm a bit nervous about the local press and such.)

(I do know I'm not supposed to use the words "long shot" to describe his candidacy if I end up talking to said press.)

Any advice would be appreciated! Thanks!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
ithinkmyliverhurts Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 10:39 AM
Response to Original message
1. I'd ask my spouse for some parameters.
It depends on what type of campaign he'll be running. Yes, even spouses become part of the message. Doesn't mean you have to change anything yourself, of course; you may have to tonedown a sacrastic streak or maybe even amplify it. It just depends. And don't let your husband get away with: just be yourself. That line means nothing and will only bring problems. Maybe get a list of things you MUST NOT do (spit in public, tell reporters to eat , or get caught eating California cheese, for example).
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
eyesroll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 10:52 AM
Original message
Thanks, Grendelsuncle...
We have a campaign adviser, so I think I need to ask him, too.

I did already tell him I'm not going to get pregnant for political purposes (so, yes, I'll need to tone down the sarcasm in public).

I suppose I'll need a haircut (not an image-changing one; I'm just too scraggly for photos right now).
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Rose Siding Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 10:52 AM
Original message
That is so exciting!
I'd like to advise to just be open and sincere but I have no idea if that is what would "work".

My subjective response is that maybe you'll have a chance to meet lots of people and listen to what they say- even offer a bit of hope and gain insight of how the govt should relate to them.

I'd keep a journal.

Best of luck to you both.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Rose Siding Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 10:52 AM
Response to Original message
2. That is so exciting!
I'd like to advise to just be open and kind but I have no idea if that is what would "work".

My subjective response is that maybe you'll have a chance to meet lots of people and listen to what they say- even offer a bit of hope and gain insight of how the govt should relate to them.

I'd keep a journal.

Best of luck to you both.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
oneighty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 11:08 AM
Response to Original message
3. Be prepared to
be "Hit on" a lot. My wife was.

180
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
eyesroll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 11:18 AM
Response to Reply #3
5. Eeekkk....
I'm already in a male-dominated industry (or, more specifically, I edit a trade publication serving that industry), and while I must say the vast, vast majority of people I meet at trade shows are wonderful people, every now and again I just get utterly grossed out.

(Like by the one guy who tried to get me to help him cheat on his wife -- who was upstairs in the hotel sleeping, as was his infant son.)

But thanks for the heads-up. (I did get hit on by a freelance photographer working for one of the presidential candidates at the WI Dem convention...)

180, what did you run for? Did you win? (Feel free to ignore that if you're trying to retain your anonymity.)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
oneighty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 12:03 PM
Response to Reply #5
8. No problem eyesroll!
Check your inbox!

Ed
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
blm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 11:14 AM
Response to Original message
4. Congratulations...
it's a tough position to be in, but, I think many would prefer you just be the unashamed, unapologetic liberal that you are.

Best of luck to you both, and please keep us posted on how we can be of best help to you.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Clete Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 11:19 AM
Response to Original message
6. Don't give the opposition anything to criticize you about except
what works in your favor. I think Hillary Clinton could be a role model. She stumbled at first with her tea and cookies remark, but has metamorphosed into this articulate woman not to be messed with.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
catzies Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 11:25 AM
Response to Original message
7. Maybe this will help.
I'm the PAC chair for a national organization that gets women elected, but the same advice we give our candidates would apply to you as well. Here's a snippet from our handbook for candidate training I don't think I'll get in trouble for sharing.
****************************************************************
ARE YOU READY FOR ALL THE ATTENTION?

Can you face a crowd and convey your convictions? Can you handle 18 matters or 18 people vying for your attention all at once? How well do you perform if you haven’t had enough sleep? Are you good with people? Can you delegate authority? Can you attract and maintain a strong team? Do you know how to handle criticism without taking it personally?

Those with the best survival rates are usually those with a good sense of humor, high self-esteem and a base of friends and supporters who will help them through the rough and tough times.

Not everyone is born to lead, especially when you consider the public scrutiny associated with candidacy and holding office. Naturally, some women feel more secure than others speaking before a crowd, asking for money and support talking to the press or living the “fishbowl” existence of a candidate or elected official.

Some critical questions to ask yourself before you decide to run:

How do you respond to rejection AND compliments?

How well do you handle self-promotion?

How do you respond to sharing your personal life with the public?

Don’t underestimate the importance of knowing your physical and emotional stamina when deciding to run because a campaign can be 15-hour days and the stress of being under constant scrutiny can take its toll on the hardiest of souls. How you handle the increasing press of people, speaking engagements and other requests for your time and presence, and demands of your staff will determine just how well you survive the election process. Running for office is like starting the most disciplined of diets. You’ll have many new restrictions that you must approach realistically. Can you keep up a neat, attractive appearance? Even though no one you have ever met or seen in the media that holds elective office has been perfectly built, educated and experienced, take some time to consider the image you want to project and the steps needed to accomplish that if you’re not there yet. Give yourself enough time to look and feel your best. And don’t forget that the most important time of the campaign may be the time you spend alone, whether it’s in your office during the day, in you car while driving to campaign events or at home at night at the end of your very long day. Maximize your waking hours but balance that with the time needed to recharge your batteries.

EVERYONE HAS A CLOSET

One of the issues that has taken the forefront especially as the media covers candidates and campaigns is the entire past of the candidate in question. No one is perfect. Everyone has stumbled, consciously or unconsciously into circumstances that they would rather not have in the list of experiences. Because women are generally perceived to be more honest, the public can be more jolted when a woman’s indiscretions or perhaps unsavory past is thrust into the public eye. No one thing may eliminate you as a candidate; it’s how you handle this type of issue that may impact the voters’ response. Just be prepared for the worst case scenario and determine early in your campaign just what your responses to those questions will be. Don’t overlook your professional resume when it comes to being honest about your past. Reporters have a field day when searching out inconsistencies or flat-out falsehoods in a candidate’s own written profile. Having discrepancies in you own resume featured on the front page of your local newspaper may easily destroy your chances of ever holding elective office.

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Yupster Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 12:04 PM
Response to Original message
9. Hippocratic oath
first, do no harm.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
JCMach1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 12:15 PM
Response to Original message
10. Hire a cleaning service, buy a good pair of shoes
and prepare to work your buns off over the next year...

It is VERY hard work with lots of UPS and DOWNS.

My experience comes from running for the Florida Legislature in 2002. My wife worked as my campaign manager as well. It was a HUGE district which could be compared to the average CD size.

We put 30,000 miles on a brand new car!!!

Good luck and may your diety bless you!!!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
eyesroll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 12:27 PM
Response to Reply #10
12. Thankfully, our CD is urban/suburban
...I basically commute across it every day for work anyway.

I won't be the manager -- I'll probably be editing stuff, that sort of thing. But, shoes. Yes.

Thanks to everyone for the good advice!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
RUMMYisFROSTED Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-18-03 12:17 PM
Response to Original message
11. Perhaps...
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DU AdBot (1000+ posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to view 
this author's profile Click to add 
this author to your buddy list Click to add 
this author to your Ignore list Fri Apr 26th 2024, 12:24 AM
Response to Original message
Advertisements [?]
 Top

Home » Discuss » Archives » General Discussion (Through 2005) Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators


Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC