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historian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-12-04 08:51 PM
Original message
age old riddle finally deciphered
Why did the chicken cross the road?

GEORGE W BUSH
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to
know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against
us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of
the chicken crossing the road.

HANS BLIX
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been
allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it!

RALPH NADER
The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had been polluted by
unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled
habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the
wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

PAT BUCHANAN
To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

RUSH LIMBAUGH
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting
a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet that somebody out there
is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road
syndrome. Can you believe this?!? How much more of this can real
Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars.
And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the
government took from you to build a road for chickens to cross.

MARTHA STEWART
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a
standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level.

No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the
chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die in the rain. Alone.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without
having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the
chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a
serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream
of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together - in peace.

ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX
It was an historic inevitability.

RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?

CAPTAIN KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.

SIGMUND FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road
reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES
I have just witnessed eChicken2003, which will not only cross roads,
but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your
checkbook. Internet explorer is an integral part of eChicken.

ALBERT EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the
chicken?

BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of
chicken?

AL GORE
I invented the chicken!

THE BIBLE
And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the chicken
THOU SHALT CROSS THE ROAD. And the chicken didst cross the
road, and there was much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS
Did I miss one?




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LittleApple81 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-12-04 08:57 PM
Response to Original message
1. Thanks! I needed that. n/t
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west michigan Donating Member (522 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-12-04 09:36 PM
Response to Original message
2. VERY COOL
and funny!
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Eye and Monkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-12-04 09:42 PM
Response to Original message
3. It wasn't a chicken.
It was a CIA agent, dressed as a chicken. Jeeeeeeeezzzzzz.

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Generator Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-12-04 09:47 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. Oh you guys
I get the my best laughs at this site next to The Daily Show.
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Cleita Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-12-04 09:52 PM
Response to Original message
5. DH and I loved it.
Thanks for the needed humor.
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GreatCaesarsGhost Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-12-04 09:57 PM
Response to Original message
6. it was too chicken to cross the road
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Eye and Monkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-12-04 10:12 PM
Response to Reply #6
7. Not too chicken. Was busy defending the skies over Texas.
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