So, Glenn Beck is delusional enough to believe himself "principled"?

[Cheap_Trick]

That would be funny if it weren't so tragic. He laid out 9 principles and said "If you believe in at least seven of them, then we have something in common."

To which I say:

Glenn, if I had ONE thing in common with you, I'd immediately walk into oncoming traffic.

You have the ethics of a pimp in a bolivian whore house.

Allow me to clarify your "principles" (clarifications in bold):

1. America is good. At least it will be when we can steal another election and drive this country into the ground once and for all.

2. I believe in God and He is the Center of my Life. And I believe in using blind faith to control the weak minded. I Also believe That I will Randomly capitalize Words as I see Fit.

3. I must always try to be a more honest person than I was yesterday. Of course, I will fail miserably EVERYDAY.

4. The family is sacred. My spouse and I are the ultimate authority (and Mistress Ivana, when I pay her to be), not the government.

5. If you break the law you pay the penalty. Justice is blind and no one is above it. Except of course the Bush administration and cronies. And anybody with an (R) after their name.

6. I have a right to life, liberty and pursuit of happiness, but there is no guarantee of equal results. Meaning if you're poor or middle class and work hard, we're gonna screw you and take what's yours.

7. I work hard for what I have and I will share it with who I want to. Government cannot force me to be charitable. Meaning I love making the middle class pay our tax burden, the way God intended.

8. It is not un-American for me to disagree with authority or to share my personal opinion. At least it isn't now. For the last 8 years it was, when we were in charge.

9. The government works for me. I do not answer to them, they answer to me. And with the help of Mistress Ivana, we will be harsh task-mistresses.


Hope that clears things up for you.

[Goblinmonger]

1. I know this makes me a grammar nazi

but apparently using the objective case of "who" is not one of his principles.

[SacredCow]

2. Not to mention the ending of a sentence with a preposition....

But what does good grammar matter when there are unhappy fundies out there?

[Tangerine LaBamba]

3. I just heard

that Mistress Ivana quit. She found out about Oswaldo, the pool boy.

It's so damn hard to keep good help, isn't it?

(Great OP!)

:toast:

K&R

[Doctor_J]

4. Why are there THREE Glen Beck threads in the E&A top ten?

:shrug:

[yourout]

5. KnR