Wicked witch of Left: how Hillary became a storybook villain

[emad]

Wicked witch of Left: how Hillary became a storybook villain
By James Langton
(Filed: 09/10/2005)

A children's picture book for conservatives whose villains include Hillary Clinton and Senator Ted Kennedy has become the surprise publishing hit of the year.

Sales of Help! Mom! There are Liberals Under My Bed! have rivalled even the latest Harry Potter novel, with the book racing up the best-seller charts after it was published two weeks ago.

Written by Katharine DeBrecht, a mother of three, it tells the story of two young brothers who try to make money from a lemonade stall but are thwarted at every turn by Left-wing politicians who threaten to put them out of business.

Steeped in Republican values, the book was written as an alternative to Left-leaning children's tales such as King and King whose royal hero finds true love in a gay marriage and Heather Has Two Mommies about a little girl with lesbian parents.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2005/10/09/wclin09.xml&sSheet=/news/2005/10/09/ixworld.html

[Tom Joad]

1. Anyone who wants to send MORE troops to Iraq is wicked.

I will take that back if Chelsea signs up. Maybe.

[bullimiami]

2. Directly proportional to how scared the BFEE is of her.

Its an age-old power struggle. Between Imperialist Elitists and Popularists.
Between the Right and Left. Between 'Royalty' (yes that is how the bushs see themselves) and Commoner. Between those who deserve to OWN and those destined to SERVE.

Considering how far from the real left Hillary is the vitriol seems misplaced. But todays republican party is insane.

[cal04]

3. Thom Hartman is talking about this in his next hour

on Air America

[mcscajun]

4. And *this* is what makes me crazy about RWers

I haven't read "King and King" or "Heather Has Two Mommies", but I'd be willing to wager a week's pay that neither books attacks any political viewpoint or individual. Those books are generic stories about tolerance for other lifestyles.

So, a book that's "steeped in Republican values" must then be titled as making Liberals scary, and attacking Hillary Clinton and Ted Kennedy personally?

Call that fair, call that balanced, you Faux Snooze watchers? I sure don't.

[tom_paine]

10. Unquestionably so. And a children's book which did the mirror opposite

of what this Bushevik Monster's book did would be shrieked at across the entire Trillion-dollar edifice of the Bush Party-Loyal Sub-Media.

[cassiepriam]

5. Let's face it, many Americans are nasty and stupid.

And those are their good traits.

[agincourt]

7. I'm afraid you're right

I seem to see less decent ones every day. They always defend GWB or any conservative rat because they are one of them. Someone who actually is decent and honerable they despise.

[cassiepriam]

8. Yes, we have to face the fact that the repugs are a reflection of the

American people to a large extent. Ignorant, greedy,
racist, apathetic. Bush mirrors our dark side.
And yes, Kerry spent his youth risking his life for his
country. A real hero. And all we can do is bash him.
Maybe we deserve the leadership we get.

[muriel_volestrangler]

6. With an uncredited role played by Democratic Underground

It has provoked a furious reaction among Democrats, with one Left-wing website comparing it with Nazi propaganda and another adding Mrs DeBrecht to its weekly list of "Top 10 Conservative Idiots".

[Democrats_win]

9. Book only tells half the story: Liberals prevent lukemia, lead-filled air

Does the book address Wal-Mart getting subsidies from Cons and opening up a lemonade stand across the street selling lemonade at half the price still making an outrageous profit because the lemons were picked by orphans in China. When the boys try to declare bankruptcy, they can't and must drop out of their liberal-established school to pay citibank.

On his job, Tommy, is asked to clean a reaction chamber and gets stuck inside. When his co-workers pull him out, he's not breathing. Someone calls 9/11 and luckily the liberal city leaders put a fire station not to far away and Tommy is revived by the paramedics.

Or, does the book discuss the lukemia Lou gets because Tom Delay's bill allowed Texaco to build an oil refinery in his backyard. Luckily, a doctor, who got his education from the liberal GI bill was able to help Lou beat his cancer.

Guess the author missed that these boys had the intelligence to become budding entrepreneurs because "liberal" environmental regulations took lead out of the air.

Guess the Con author forgot to mention that the boys had wonderful parents who can spend time at home with their kids because of the 40 hour work week, and when the week gets a little longer, the parents are paid a little more for their time.

But guess what, when the boys look under their bed they see James Dobson who's spying on the boys so they don't do anything he interprets from the Bible as being wrong. Tommy was so afraid of his same-sex attraction that he spent his high-school years as a wallflower.

When the boys grow older, they're cajoled into going to fight in bush's war that no one understands why we're fighting. Tommy comes back with a disfigured face and missing a rightleg. Lou comes back and tries to live the American dream.

When Lou tries to get a job, he's accused of being on drugs, like many job seekers, and must take a drug test which he fails because the cheapskates who control the test didn't put any safeguards in place against false positives.

Lou, the boy searching for the American dream now works at the Wal-Mart that put him out of business. The Wal-Mart works him for 32 hours each week but only pays him for 28.

After 17 years at Wal-Mart, Lou is earning $10/hour and Wal-Mart fires him telling him that they'll re-hire him for $8.50/hr.

Lou goes home, burns his copy of "Help! Mom! There Are Liberals Under My Bed!" He finally realizes that after voting for republicans all those years, the republicans have been working against him.

Lou learns that Tommy committed suicide and wrote in his suicide note that he regrets that he never had the chance to fall in love.

After joining the Democratic Party, Lou starts to walk a little taller, felling more like a person because he knows there are other people out there just like him who will fight for fairness against exploiters like Wal-Mart and other conservatives. He joins the Sierra Club club so that other children will not suffer from lukemia as he did.

Five years after Lou retires on liberal Social Security, Lou tries to find the Con author only to learn that she had to flee the country rather than face insider trading charges on the Halliburton stock she sold after learning someone was going to expose the truth about her book: that she was a propagandist for Halliburton trying to get kids to join the military so Halliburton could make more money selling and not providing meals to them.

Lou, a liberal, passes away surrounded by his grand-children who are all Democrats because Lou told them the truth about republicans.

[Demit]

11. I like your sequel!

You should write it as an op-ed and send it to a newspaper, seriously.

[mcscajun]

12. I second the nomination for LTTE.

This is Good!

Although you'd probably have to shorten it some for most newspapers.