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I've been thinking about Soul Mates a lot lately

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the Princess Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-18-05 02:41 PM
Original message
I've been thinking about Soul Mates a lot lately
And I am wondering if anyone has any thoughts on the subject.

My feelings are that when you do meet a true soul mate in this lifetime - it will be a very challenging and passionate relationship - not necessarily easy. Soul Mates have stuff to work out together and in my experience (having met at least 2 soul mates in my life - I think) it usually doesn't work out very well. And even tho the love is intense - the problems make it very difficult to be together. I am right now dealing with a situation with a man who I know with all my heart is a soul mate but the relationship is so volatile and so passionate that it is almost impossible not to argue on a regular basis - even tho we love each other intensely. We fight like teen agers - and at the time it feels important but afterward we usually wind up laughing at our oun stupidity.

We are just friends but there is so much more to it that I think the passion of what we really feel bubbles over and makes it difficult to communicate. Neither one of us has ever felt a connection like this ever and I think we are still both confused by what is the most intense relationship we have both ever had. And both being intense people it makes it doubly difficult. Maybe we are twin souls rather than soul mates. Sometimes it sure feels that way.

Hubby on the other hand is someone I know I have been with many times in past lives and yes it's challenging and at times it's damn hard - but we always seem to work it out and it's comfortable and he makes me feel safe and loved as apposed to difficult and argumentative.

So anyway that's me rambling. What do you think????

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stellanoir Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-18-05 02:50 PM
Response to Original message
1. well
Edited on Fri Feb-18-05 03:20 PM by stellanoir
a friend wrote to me last week and was whining about a lost love.

Here's an excerpt of what he wrote. . .


> , and of talk of "soul mates" etc, I believe
> that this one may have been it...

>There was just absolutely something electric the first time she and I met...
>it remains in my mind as clear as if it were yesterday, and EVERYONE around
>us noticed this...

Here is my response. . .

This is of course pure speculation about that particular phenomenon. . .Having dedicated a boat load of time to counseling folks about the total mystery of interpersonal dynamics, I've heard many speak of and met some pairs of presumed soul mates. I do believe that they do indeed truly exist and in some cases, actually get to be together. But considering the types of experiences I've observed I don't believe it's always a situation of absolution. There are also soul connections where people are drawing from the same oversoul. That's kind of like an etheric tribe or collective, represented by what is conventionally referred to as an Archangel or some other larger than life entity. I always recognize those folks with whom I'm connected in that regard, even if I don't ever interact with them personally. That's a deep soul connection but not necessarily a soul mate. Those are more than likely, the cause of the dynamic of hero worship as well.

Though soul connections are eternal on the spiritual plane they can often be transitory in terms of shared purpose on the physical plane. This oftentimes results in a holy host of confusion. The ruse of becoming whole through another when one hasn't arrived at wholeness within themselves can of course be utterly tragic. I personally blame Disney (not the Cathars) for this.

Sometimes our souls are entangled in some fairly obtusely curious dynamics and can be quite volatile as well.

There are also twin flames. Sometimes the energy between two of those is so intense they can't even be around each other much or for very long. It varies wildly though. Whirlwind romances that end as suddenly as they began can occur between them, leaving both parties completely baffled wondering,"what the heck was that?" They can also be of the same gender.

Just babbling here 'cause I don't want you to feel as though the kind of thing you experienced with this woman was necessarily an occasion of singularity. I know from droves of anecdotal evidence, that if this woman was truly your soul mate, you probably wouldn't have lost touch with her. She was probably either a very deep soul connection or perhaps a twin flame. Reunited twin flames invariably conduct a tremendous amount of energy and that may be why their physical connection can often either over amp or burn out. It's very simply, very hard to channel and ground an identical energy on a plane of duality.

Understand that there are innumerable half baked theories out there on this subject. This is just MY current half baked take on it and like any opinion is subject to change on a dime. And yes. . . I do realize that all of this may sound terribly convoluted but that is what tends to happen when anyone tries to describe "interdimensional" energies in a non dogmatic way.

So there.

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the Princess Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-18-05 03:28 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. WOW
Edited on Fri Feb-18-05 03:34 PM by the Princess
I think I may have to read your post a couple of times before I really understand all you have said. But thank you so much. :)

What would be your best guess of my friendship with a man who every single time I see him it's like lightening hits me when our eyes meet. And the chemistry is over powering. And it's the same way for him too. And we are so much alike it's scary at times. We were also born in the same month a year apart. He is one year older than me. And he has this overwhelming desire to protect me.

I would just like an educated guess. We are both aware there is more here then meets the eye - but we are both also happily married which makes it even more confusing.
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stellanoir Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-19-05 12:52 AM
Response to Reply #2
4. My random guess is that
Edited on Sat Feb-19-05 12:54 AM by stellanoir
this may indeed be your twin flame. As I mentioned in my earlier post, these dynamics are often extremely difficult to ground. If circumstances allow and you have a shared purpose, perhaps on a creative level, then you may be able to manifest something positive.

My experience is that they can often burn out very quickly if and when it becomes intimate.

If I told you what transpired over 30 years between my twin flame and myself, then your head would spin so I'll spare you from the precise details. But he was exceedingly protective as well for the first 15 years or so. Then he grew frustrated with my behavior and set me up "for my own good" merely wanting to share what we had in terms of a shared vision. Then in the last years of his life he strangely grew even more protective.

Simply savor the connection but don't necessarily trash both of your happy marriages over it.

Good luck to you and yours.



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NEOBuckeye Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-19-05 03:50 AM
Response to Reply #1
5. Sounds like the story of my life...
> , and of talk of "soul mates" etc, I believe
> that this one may have been it...

>There was just absolutely something electric the first time she and I met...
>it remains in my mind as clear as if it were yesterday, and EVERYONE around
>us noticed this...

I swear I've said the exact same things about a "window" of brief chance meetings I had with someone about 5 years ago. Just talking with her was totally electric, I mean, like nothing I've ever felt with anyone else I have ever known before or since. She was just so warm and radiant! She entered my life so unexpectedly -- and vanished just as suddenly -- before I could even catch a clue as to what it was all about. The memories are just as vivid as they were on the days we met, and I'm still kicking myself for not asking her out that night.

I mean, these experiences are so rare, right? From what I've read, I probably have a better chance of hitting the state lottery before I find another connection like that one, or the connection finds me.

That's kinda depressing.
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all.of.me Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-05 07:46 PM
Response to Reply #1
9. twin flame question
this sounds like a friendship i've had over the last couple of years. we met at our kids' school, and it was fast and furious for a couple of months. nothing sexual, just spending a lot of time together every day, deep conversations, opening up immediately, trust, intimacy. it ended in a split second in a fiery debate.

we resumed it a few months later after trying to hash out what went wrong the first time. again, it was fast and furious for a few months, this time with sexual undertones, then ended again in another explosive scene.

that was 7 months ago. my daughter is now in a different school, so there is no daily contact anymore. we see each other around town, and there is curious energy there.

i am way more evolved than he is. he has been a drunk for most of his adult life. now sober for four years, he's like a 20 year old just discovering the world. his insights are shallow - he's learning what i learned back then! it's hard to communicate sometimes, because even though he is almost 50, his development has been arrested.

i have often wondered if he is my twin flame. we are alike in so many respects, deep ways, subconscious ways. i've even had dreams where i am reflected in his sunglasses. he is in my dreams a LOT.

we really love each other in a weird way. i am the one who feels protective of him.

so my question is - is it possible for twin flames to be at different places in their spiritual development? now that i write it down, it seems like a stupid question. i guess the differences in development are what make it hard to get along on this physical plane?

thanks for your insights!
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jbnow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-18-05 10:56 PM
Response to Original message
3. It isn't always easy
Years ago a group at a party was talking about soul mates. I stayed out of it, but my face must have been reacting. Someone said to me "I take it you don't believe in soul mates."

I said I do believe, but the meeting of soul mates is for the good of the souls, not for comfort of the person. It's not all it's cracked up to be. I didn't want to go much further (because I had too much to say?)

Twin souls or twin flame, soul recognition strikes deeply, myths come to life. It doesn't come with guide books. The purpose or path is rarely obvious.

I heard more the I wanted to from accidentally met psychics I wasn't even talking to about it who "had a message for me".

One thing I was told I will pass on (not as advice). She said it is a rare gift to be on this plane at the same time as our twin. We have a work to do together that we agreed to take on. I was told not to cut him from my life. I recall she said laughing, "You don't have to bed him but you can't just refuse to see him" She said the barriers are also there for a reason and whatever it is, whether he is married, a drunk, whatever it is...those things that keep us apart are as important to the plan as what brings us together. The time makes such an impact that the correct degree of separation is crucial too.

End of her message.
I am not the obedient type. I certainly would feel free to close the door, but I try to remember to give it due respect, to see and listen with my heart as well as my mind and not make purely ego decisions.

It isn't always "difficult and argumentative", we communicate eerily well. I have stories that sound like science fiction. But there are barriers...
If we come to trigger certain things in the other that is what we do. I suspect this in a time of powerful spiritual shifts and so many older souls are here now...and meeting up. Barriers to growth are being shed. Transitions can be tough.

The intensity can be overwhelming, it's not like the high of infatuations. I don't know if the intensity fades with a "twin". Twenty years and I still wait for it to normalize. But the intensity comes from...how corny this sounds but a feeling of "heaven" on earth. Like a magnified feeling of the sense of the divine you find in many times and places. It seems/feels like the matching frequency of soul vibrations magnify it, the resonance increases the flow of that energy that we are.

Boy there sure aren't good words for this. But it's not a thing you can rush, not to or from. If there is a human blessing to it, maybe it is it forces us to return to center and deal with life from their. (I don't mean political center of course)



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Cleita Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-19-05 01:14 PM
Response to Original message
6. Well, I did consider my late husband my soulmate.
It took twenty years though for both of us to realize it. I think what you are describing is more the mating game than anything else. To connect at the soul level, you have to get past the sexual attraction.
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Pallas180 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-19-05 11:55 PM
Response to Reply #6
7. I'd like an explanation, definition of
"twin flame" please.

I've been around for awhile - and have never heard this expression.

I know of people re-incarnating as a group.

I know of soulmates.

Soulmate is your other half, the other piece of your soul that was divided at the big boom - so to speak....

but what is a "twin flame" - sounds suspiciously to me like the same as "soulmate"

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Desertrose Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-25-05 01:55 AM
Response to Reply #7
10. FWIW-here's where I've gotten to on this.....
This is late at nite & I'm trying to simplify as much as I can....:)


Soulmates....
We can have more than one soulmate...in fact we actually have lots of "soul-mates"- those who we have spent other lifetimes with...we can have "minor" or "major" soulmates. These are most often souls with which we may have some issues/karma that connect or bind us- not necessarily negative.They are often from our soul group family which also lends a certain familiarity to the connection.

Soulmates can be same or opposite sex..."former" friends, family etc.
(I know my ex-husband was a minor soul mate). I usually can pick them out...a feeling of immediate connection and the feeling like you've known them all your life ( well you often have, just not this "current" life LOL). They just feel really nice to be around - or sometimes the opposite . There is just something about them that is like an itch under the skin...you are aware of something but unable to "logically" determne why you feel that way about them.


Twin Flames ~ Twin Souls...

This is a whole 'nother ball of wax.....my experiences have brought me to the realization that what we call a twin flame is basically your other "half". Again they can be the same or opposite gender. These relationships are much more rare and often both are not incarnate at the same point in "time". It is also my understanding that things can be rather difficult between them in the physical just because the energies are so strong and similar....but when it works, it is an incredible connection.

Just to hazard a guess...I would say that most connections are probably of the soulmate variety.....which can be and are quite intense. I would venture a guess (& yeah, how do you prove it other than "gut" feeling)that most people you are close to and are in your life are some degree of soulmate...not quite the same as entire groups incarnating together but still, as I "get" it, souls often come back together...siblings, parent/child, comrades in arms...any number of combinations....


The twin flame thing...I'll try to find some links for you.

Bottom line...think very close & compelling connection for soulmates....for twin flames, take that times about 1000!!

Just my 2 cents:hi:
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NJCher Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-05 03:10 AM
Response to Original message
8. it can be easy
Edited on Sun Feb-20-05 03:13 AM by NJCher
I think it can be easy. I met my husband 20 years ago and we knew it was for real immediately. Despite a brief period where there were some problems freeing myself from a couple of relationships I was involved in when I met him, it's been clear sailing ever since. We've probably only had one or two arguments in 20-odd years. We are almost completely on the same wavelength--hardly even have to talk to communicate.

I've done a synastry and it's quite a combo; almost completely complementary.


Cher

edited to correct a double negative
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