Reply #39: Sounds like it with our kid -

[haele]

Especially if she's had it easy before and doesn't really understand she can't just "do it" and goof off the rest of the time as she used to. At twelve, she's still thinking in black and white terms and her world is still pretty small, but hormones are starting to kick in with all their power and urges. If she never really had to exert control over her actions, she has no clue how to handle those feelings and urges.
She's probably just becoming aware that she has power of her own because she's no longer the small one.

She probably thinks she's all grown up because she thinks she knows what grown-ups do and she has all these powerful feelings like grown ups do that must mean she's grown up.
And of course, her friends. Who always seem to have it so much easier than she does.

And of course, she still probably wants to be babied at times. If you can't read her mind and don't pay attention to her when she wants you to, she'll feel like you don't care, and to some kids, that means you probably need to be punished.

Good luck, tweenage can be terrible, especially for girls - because modern society has aimed to condition girls not to explore and possibly get banged up a little, but to desire to be "princesses" with their perfect princess life. If she's spending her life on Facebook, she's probably also becoming passive. Does she have any hobbies or responsibilities that take her out of the house and actually get her to accomplish something? If she doesn't, she could be heading towards aimless slacker-dom.

And if she has an older sibling with ADD, she may need to be checked for that herself. And be aware that ADD with a bit of depression often seems to be Bi-Polar and vice-versa.

Just my experience. If you can get her turned and into some activity that's productive rather than sitting around and gossiping like Facebook-world, you'd probably only go through two or three years of hell instead of the five to seven years of hell parents of most petulant, aimless, passive-aggressive girls who used to be clever and happy are going through.

Haele