Reply #22: Unless your niece is in a state that recognizes common law marriage

[cap]

and has been living with her SO for that length of time, she isnt the closest relative. Closest relative would be the parents, and then the siblings. Yes, your niece can be barred from seeing her SO. She's not the closest relative who can legally make decisions for her SO. No marriage certificate, no legal standing. This is why the gays want marriage so badly. Your niece is in a similar situation.

The best thing to do is to work through the hospital social worker. The hospital social worker will try and get the family --- your niece and the mother -- to work together in the best interest of the patient.

Unfortunately, the best thing to do for your niece is to suck it in and be patient beyond all human endurance. Good skills in relative wrangling are in order here. She has to play that mother's game no matter how screwy that mother is. At least until her young man is conscious and can make his own decisions.


Your daughter needs to go to TANF and apply for assistance. If her SO has short term disability through work, at least some of that money goes to her daughter. Your niece has no right to any of that money for herself. Short term diability kicks in immediately. She can call his HR department and see if they will talk to her about it. She may be out of luck and it may be the mother who is the only one who can do this. There is paper work to be filed for longer term disability as well.

The best thing you can do is not dwell on what a B--- that mother is and work with your niece to get a "working relationship" with that woman. The hospital social worker may be your best bet.

Can any of the other relatives take in your niece? If they can't, she needs to get a room-mate ASAP.