Reply #209: Hi Buckettgirl!

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Do you blog somewhere? I would like to read what you have to say about your daily struggles with compulsive eating. My husband has that problem -- he just gets into this zone where he has to keep eating, it is hard to watch, he has done the same thing with drinking and tends to obsess sometimes on fitness as well and compulsively exercises (but not at the same time he compulsively eats).

I have noticed that I will go to food as well when stressed, anxious or feeling bad about myself. I also am now in the "obese" zone and it is hard to change lifelong habits. I used to be able to eat anything but I can't anymore. I have also tried lots of different diets and have been successful with a diet and exercise program but when life threw a curve it was back to my old bad habits. I know what you mean about and although I had been teased relentlessly in 7th and 8th grade (one girl wanted to beat me up because I didn't swear!) and then again in high school (10th grade)--come to think of it, the worst years were in the smallest school/small town and the teasing wasn't centered on my weight, it was still painful. I think Doritos and the Library were my best friends back then.

I am also a nurse! I think it is silly that people think you need advice or education about nutrition and exercise.

Nurses are on their feet all day and are pushing beds, stretchers, lifting patients, turning them etc. You get a pretty good workout on a day or evening shift. You are constantly walking very fast up and down the halls, answering call lights and fetching refreshments. You are changing beds and pushing med carts, passing linen. IV bags come in hard plastic wrappers that require some strength to open up. You almost always take the stairs if you can to drop off labs and pick up patients from xray or MRI because the elevators are so slow. I gained 8 pounds when I quit my nursing job. Plus you are so busy there is little time for breaks and patient families often bring candy to thank the nurses for their care. You end up leaving work simultaneously dehydrated, with full bladder and starving-- a little loopy from low blood sugar. We used to sneak the Boost nutrition drinks when we were shorthanded and could not take our meal breaks but then they moved them into machines so you could not get it out without charging it to a patient (and they were warm, ugh!).

I have confidence that you can overcome this compulsion when you feel sad and down on yourself. You are a very caring person, and you are very smart (and brave too!).

Have you ever seen those shows, like on CNN -- FitNation and these men and women lose all this weight and they look so different that people are just overwhelmed and in awe? You see how good they look now but I think it is important to remember that the "AFTER" is the same person in the "BEFORE". Nothing has changed in who that person is except for their outward appearance. The mind and the heart are exactly the same. They might be feeling better, but on the balance, there is no dramatic change inside that shell. Losing weight does not make anyone more loving, caring, smarter, funnier, generous, intelligent or interesting. It just makes you thinner and in most cases healthier.