Reply #123: It is about choice...

[justiceischeap]

but not the kind you think.

Here are the choices I made in life:
I chose to marry a man at the age of 19 because I was afraid of telling and accepting that I was gay. I'd known it from an early age but the fear that my parents would no longer love and accept me was too great to be honest until I was 21.

I chose to have sex with my husband (however unenjoyable it was for me)

I chose to be honest with myself at the age of 21 about my sexuality and in turn chose to be honest with my family and friends (and everyone after)

I chose not to hide in the closet.

I chose my girlfriends and wife.

I chose to be happy.

So yes, in sexuality there are choices but to wake up one day and say, "Okay, I think I'm gonna be gay or straight now" just doesn't happen. I'll give the one poster that some people do make the conscience decision to sleep with same sex partners the majority do not. However, I also agree that using the phrase "it's a choice" indulges bigotry, homophobia, etc. but it goes much deeper than that. People who think it's a choice are uninformed or chose to be uneducated. There are some minds that will never be changed on this issue and I think Richardson is one of those people. His answer was too quick and no amount of backpeddling will change my mind on that.

As far as marriage/civil unions, it's all about semantics. I see politicians using the phrase "civil unions" as a way to ease most people who don't get it, into being comfortable with calling it marriage in the long run. Whether that's good or bad is up to the individual to decide but as I stated in another post, as long as I get the rights I'm entitled to under the Constitution, right now, I could care less what they call it. Maybe as a lesbian I'm setting back the fight but I'm just trying to look at the long-term instead of the right now and maybe my line of thinking is wrong.