Reply #297: Thank you for your courteous reply

[latebloomer]

You're right that a great many rapes take place that could not have been prevented by anything the victim did or didn't do. A huge number of them happen between family members and people who know each other. And there's no way I would tell my daughter not to wear a miniskirt. I would, however, BEG her not to hitchhike, or to go home with a stranger (another time when I was nearly raped) or any of the other stupid shit that I somehow survived.

And of course the focus needs to be on the rapist himself, and what could possibly make a man become so brutal. And on the proper punishment, and rehabilitation, and on prevention and education and psychological help.

But the discussion gets very polarized here, with some people absolutely REFUSING to look at the fact that women need to learn to protect themselves, whether that be by learning self-defense moves, being careful what neighborhoods they go into, being vigilant in certain situations, not taking foolish chances. They interpret that as blaming the victim, and it's not. It's about protecting the potential victim, and preventing these crimes in those cases where it's possible.