Planet of the Dickheads

[Mythsaje]

See, the crapmasters have been running this planet for a long, long time. Little men with imperial dreams, who thought for some reason that THEY should be running things rather than that other dickhead over there, have been making life miserable for serfs, peasants, shopkeepers, and the rest of us for FAR too long.

Some of them got into religion, and rather than leading armies, led factions of priests and witchhunters who used fear of the unknown to get people to become their armies and engage in terrible acts that diminished humanity in untold ways.

There are some people who NEED these dickheads in a way I will never understand, who responded with fervor when one dickhead said "Hey, I'm just trying to protect you from THAT dickhead over there."

Uh-huh.

We see echoes of this even now, when the candidates for the Republican nomination stand on stage and proudly trumpet "I'm a bigger dickhead than HE is!"

Even the Dems try to get by in saying "Sometimes you HAVE to be a dickhead."

I certainly hope not. You can be strong and smart and not be a dickhead. George Bush is a Dickhead. Dick Cheney is a REAL dickhead. Ronald Reagan was a Dickhead. Bill Clinton tried NOT to be a dickhead, but he reverted to dickhead when it suited him. Frankly, the last President we had who wasn't a dickhead, at least some of the time, was Jimmy Carter. He became the dickhead doormat.

Barack Obama is trying to be the anti-dickhead, while, at the same time, saying that all dickheads aren't all bad.

Hillary Clinton is telling us "My husband can really be a dickhead. I can be a dickhead too."

And John Edwards is saying "Hey, the corporations think I'm a dickhead. Let me be YOUR dickhead."


So that's why I'm supporting John Edwards. It's about time the little people had their own dickhead.