Reply #47: I refer you back to "context is all."

[Orsino]

Who says it and to whom are only a couple of possible factors here. No matter how tempting it is to decide that a given word must mean this and nothing else because that's what I meant, we should avoid arguments that parse to "Well, why can't I say it whenever I want?"

We don't get to decide what might be offensive to someone else, or when, or why. What a phrase meant when it was coined decades ago is probably less important than the various other meanings it might have now.