Reply #8: Counselling can retraumatize people who prefer not to discuss

[seventhson]

these things.

So people do not always benefit from counselling.

Also SHE knows whatr she is going through and probably knows better than you what she needs (I am just guessing) based on her won experience/

All you can do is be there foir her and quit buggin her about it.

Go do what SHE wants to do and help her in any way you can to do her whitewater trip.

Making such a big deal about her birthday makes HER feel guilty about feeling grief since it pisses you off so much.

Let her grieve And party too. Celebrate life and toast Dad too - but the bigger deal you make out of it, I suspect, the more depressed you might make her.

You've told her your opinion - now lert HER make up her own mind without pressure.

Just enjoy what time you have with her and keep ot simple. If the sibs are bveiung assholes -- go alone just you and her. The otrhers will probably crash it anyway but at least let HER decide what she wants and don't try to force it.

IU work with a lot of grieving people and that is my 2 cents worth.

Don't worry. Be happy! And hopefully she will to.

Good luck.