Reply #447: This is so very sad. She's a lovely soul. I lost my mom in May

[roguevalley]

and my dad the July before. Ten months apart, losing the dearest best people that ever were. You don't think you can make it. You do, however. You can't imagine it and there are oceans of tears but you make it. You can also know they are standing next to you. When the siren in your head lessens a little, you will notice it. There are infinite signs of it if you are looking. I hope you do, honey. She will stay next to your side every day of the rest of your life and that of your boys. She will be there through every low moment and every triumph. She will let you know in myriad ways that she hears you and sends you back even more love than she could manage in life. She is merely changed in form, not gone away forever. She hears and sees you and stands by you. She only wants your happiness because that is what love seeks. You will never be alone now, not for the days of your life to come. Just listen and you will see and hear her.

She heard every word you said, saw and felt every gesture. As this all happened, the loved ones of your life and hers, those that have already gone on ahead were surrounding both of you. They were loving you and yours, offering you protection and support, even though you couldn't see them. At no point will she ever be turned away from you and your boys. She is the gentle breeze you feel when you are so tired you can't move on. Trust me.

Rose Kennedy said, "After the rain, the birds sing." I hope for you all that is good and decent and loving. I wish for you peace and hope. It will come. My parents were my life. The void you speak of, I know intimately. But in the darkness, she will be your light. Find it and focus on it and follow it. She will help you even now. She will never leave.

Take care and know you and yours are loved. I wish I could say more but you will find out for yourself. Its the long journey all of us will take, learning to live again, and she will never let you go on it alone.

Love and hope,

RV