Reply #52: Well, first thing...((hugs)) to all involved (not the church, of course)

[Solly Mack]

Mom is going to go through the process of grief.(she's been betrayed, blamed for it, had her children blamed for it, and has been banished from what she views as "family" - this is a loss for her) This will be compounded by her depression.

Maybe a needed loss - but she will still feel those emotions associated with loss - the betrayal will also compound the problem. She'll experience both the rational and irrational (rational- "How can my church family betray me? & -irrational - "Have my children betrayed me?" - the church blamed the children after all and she values the church)


The 4 of you can be there - but only to lend support as a family, you can't make this right for her. The church is using emotional extortion against the mother - there is no making that right. The mother has to be able to see that herself. She has to see the church for what it really is - a negative force.

She probably doesn't accept it yet, but there's nothing wrong with her and there's nothing wrong with her children - it's the church that's the problem. Will she consider counseling? To help her through the stages of her grief (and suppressed anger)...and to have someone that's not close to the situation guide her through this time?

Wishing the best for you all!