Reply #70: Once again, it's learned

[redqueen]

Speaking from personal experience here. If you grow up in a home where Mom & Dad are fighting and yelling and Dad beats up Mom & you and your brothers & sisters, then on a subconscious level, you're learning that this is FAMILY. This is LOVE.

So, your first relationships, as a consequence (and this is of course not true if you're more self-aware that most), are usually a reflection of that experience. You end up being mysteriously drawn towards abusive people, wanting a family you look for what your subconcsious has learned is family. A bit of therapy usually does the trick, though. :)