Reply #13: Fine, but stop whining

[frazzled]

I've had many close friends who chose not to have children. Not an issue. Completely respect it.

I've also had friends and family who chose to have children who have been equally questioned or criticized:

(1) a 53-year-old successful single woman who decided to adopt a child by herself late in life. Everyone told her she was nuts and would be in her 70s when the child graduated high school. She went ahead and eventually adopted two daughters and formed a wonderful family for herself.

(2) a friend who at 46 decided to get pregnant for the first time (her husband already had a special needs child from a former marriage). Beautiful success story, but she had to keep it secret until all was well for fear of people criticizing her choice on health grounds.

(3) my nephew and his partner who decided to adopt and no one thought the prospects were very likely; a week and a half after being listed on the registry they were called and have a beautiful healthy baby daughter, who they have had since the age of two days old.

I could go on. The point of the story is: (1) don't judge anyone's decision, whether they decide to have no children, have six children, or to have them too young or too old; (2) whatever your personal decision, you're not the only one being questioned or having eyebrows raised.