Reply #123: As a "culture," I think we're really screwed up about sex.

[TahitiNut]

I believe you "frame the experience" positively in no small part because of the bizarre inequities in our thinking about sex -- where male teens are 'patted on the back' (at least figuratively) and people go fucking ballistic if it's a female teen. I personally don't regard either reaction as reasonable or sane ... it's almost like reactionary extremism in some psychotic attempt to balance things out.

It all reeks of the myth that females are somehow the less "rewarded" by sexual relations ... that males "get a piece of ass."

Maybe I really am strange, but I've never, ever had a satisfactory sexual experience where my partner wasn't equally and wholly as motivated and participatory as I. Anything short of that just isn't worth undressing for - it ain't worth shit.

In studying abnormal psychology, one thing bothered me -- while I could detect the shadows and kinks in myself for nearly any malady (students are even warned abou this), I just couldn't for the life of me find anything that would even allow me to rape someone. I can usually find some point of empathy for just about any perversion ... except that. For example, I think I can understand why someone would murder another person. I just can't find empathy for rape or sexual assault. I don't think it has anything to do with my childhood experiences ... either remembered or suppressed. It's like there's something missing ... and I don't know whether it's really a good thing to miss it.