what is the deal with this continuing racist behavior of whites

[Moonwalk]

30. I think you were too harsh. I don't know how these two came across to you....

...maybe they were noses in the air, demeaning and frivolous. But as you describe them, it doesn't sound like they needed to be publicly shamed and silenced. It sounds like they needed to be educated. I know that's a hard thing to do in this climate. Especially when your hear such casual, ignorant bigotry and it like this and it feels like the last straw. But compare this to Lobo27's "Unexpected Racism" thread. There, a woman was being an out-and-out racist, and needed to be shut down firmly and unequivocally.

Going from your description, these people weren't attacking anyone. Which means there probably wasn't any reason to put them on the spot. You could have said, "Excuse me, I couldn't help overhearing. Exactly what do you mean by "African Americans have come so far?" Then you'd listen, and say, "I don' think you're seeing how that view comes across...." And gone on about slavery, segregation and how important it was for them to recognize their privilege, and to understand the arrogance and inherent racism in wha they were thinking and saying.

Shaming and embarrassing people silences them. And I don't think that's best if their hearts and minds can be put into the right place. That they were even having a conversation about it was, in fact, a step in the right direction, because that means the talk could be shifted. That their narrow field of vision could be expanded. It's like paying it forward. You do this for them, and the next time they're with friends and those friends say something similar, they can expand that conversation and educate their friends. But if you shut them down, shame and embarrass them, then all they'll say to their friends is "better not talk like that out loud. We did in this restaurant and this stranger came down on us like a ton of bricks!"

I say all this because it's so easy to let the Trolls, Trump supporters, racists and republicans make us think that attacking is the only way to react in such situations. But shooting to kill isn't always necessary, and usually just leaves people on the defensive. Listening and discussing, instead, can open them up and change them. Robert Byrd, who was a member of the Klan, transformed and apologized. If he could do that, then I think people like this couple could do it as well, given the chance. They certainly haven't nearly as far to go as Byrd did. So why not give them an opportunity to understand themselves, and so be better and do better?