Are you a misogynist? Taking the test. [View all]

[Laelth]

This discussion thread was locked as off-topic by Raffi Ella (a host of the General Discussion forum).

A recent DU thread, HERE, contains some very helpful hints about how to avoid the appearance of misogyny on DU. It's useful to know what opinions we may hold that may be deemed misogynistic, and, toward that end, the OP linked to above provides a good list of possible opinions that demonstrate clear misogyny to our DU feminist allies. Because I admire and appreciate these allies, I felt the need to take this test and determine my own misogyny quotient.

Here's the test (if you want to take it) to see how much of a misogynist you are:

1. Insisting the SCOTUS Hobby Lobby decision isn't a big deal
2. Insisting men should have the right to compel a woman to abort a fetus
3. Insisting a man's having to pay child support equates with the state's efforts to prohibit abortion
4. Insisting men are more oppressed than women
5. Adopting the GOP idea of forcible rape vs. other rape and insisting the later (usually child rape) is less serious.
6. Insisting that large numbers of women invent false rape charges
7. Insisting rapists should not be punished with jail time
8. Frequently taking the side of accused rapists over their victims
9. Insisting women's issues and feminism aren't important and don't constitute real politics
10. Insisting women who object to rape porn or prostitution are uptight right-wingers
11. Calling feminists prudes and Puritans
12. the sex-negative label
13. Calling women c...t and b....s
14. A whole slew of derogatory or sexualized comments about women's bodies
15. Portraying a view of women that makes it clear someone sees their only purpose as to provide them sex
16. anti-choice positions
17. opposing ACA's covering of women's reproductive care
18. blaming women for their own sexual assaults
19. arguing that violence against women isn't important
20. arguing that rape isn't a societal problem
21. Insisting a misogynistic mass murderer had real concerns about how bad off men have it today
22. denying sexism and misogyny
23. arguing that women in the US should be content with what they have
24. Citing a study held out by an MRA big-wig that claims women say no when they really mean yes
25. Insisting consent is "elastic"
26. Insisting that consent is assumed.
27. Insisting there is no such thing as male privilege
28. Men telling women they aren't real feminists because they disagree with them on an issue like porn or prostitution.

Here are my results:

1. Insisting the SCOTUS Hobby Lobby decision isn't a big deal
Hobby Lobby is a big deal, and I dislike the ruling for myriad reasons--mainly for the increased power it gives corporations to avoid the law. Corporations are legal fictions, and, by definition, they can not have "religious beliefs" that supersede the law. This was a bad ruling, but, because it was 5-4, I suspect it can be overturned relatively quickly.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

2. Insisting men should have the right to compel a woman to abort a fetus
I accept that, as a man, I may be required to pay child support for a child I did not want, but I recognize that I have no rights whatsoever to any fetus and that a woman should have the absolute and unconditional right to abort any fetus she does not wish to carry to term. This may seem unfair to some people, but I can live with it. I'm not the one risking my life and my future by having an unwanted baby. This is what I would call an "advantage" that women have over men, and I'm fine with that. Men have some advantages. Women have some advantages.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

3. Insisting a man's having to pay child support equates with the state's efforts to prohibit abortion
No. Those are not the same things at all, and I accept that. I will always and unconditionally protect the right of a person to have complete medical confidence with their doctors and to have complete control over medical decisions--including the decision to have an abortion.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

4. Insisting men are more oppressed than women
I'm not sure about the word "oppressed," as I don't think that's what's at issue here. I think we can all agree that it's just hard to be a human being, especially in the United States in 2014, but my experience of the state of our society leads me to the conclusion that it's harder to be a man. If you look at incarceration rates, life expectancy, homelessness rates, on-the-job injury rates (and just about every other social statistic you can imagine), you'll see that this society is rougher on men than it is on women. If our feminist allies would just acknowledge that it's really hard to be a man in this world, lines of communication might be more open, but few (on DU, at least) are willing to do so.
BAD--you are a misogynist.

5. Adopting the GOP idea of forcible rape vs. other rape and insisting the later (usually child rape) is less serious.
Rape is rape, and rape is wrong. I make no distinction between "types" of rapes, and I take rape, like all other bodily injuries, very seriously.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

6. Insisting that large numbers of women invent false rape charges
Did you ever read To Kill a Mockingbird? False rape charges do happen, and they can have disastrous effects on innocent men. That said, I have no idea how often this occurs. I am willing to give women the benefit of the doubt on this question, however, as I know it's very difficult to report a rape. I know that women are mercilessly attacked (from various quarters) when they do report a rape. My gut tells me to believe the woman in such situations, but it's also true that false rape charges occur. How often I do not know.
ADEQUATE AT BEST--you may or may not be a misogynist based upon your response.

7. Insisting rapists should not be punished with jail time
Huh? Nobody I know insists that rapists should not go to prison (much less jail). Rapists should be imprisoned--all of them. Of course, imprisonment leads to a lot of people getting raped (in prison, of course), but I still think rapists should go to prison.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

8. Frequently taking the side of accused rapists over their victims
My experience leads me to believe that the accuser is probably the more trustworthy witness (because the social pressure to not report a rape is immense). Thus, I tend to believe the accuser (while noting that false reports of rape do happen).
ADEQUATE AT BEST--you may or may not be a misogynist based upon your response.

9. Insisting women's issues and feminism aren't important and don't constitute real politics
Gender issues, imo, are the most important things that human beings discuss. Gender issues affect all of us. They are essential to our civilization. I would never dismiss gender issues. That, in fact, is why I posted this thread--because I consider this conversation essential.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

10. Insisting women who object to rape porn or prostitution are uptight right-wingers
Porn is ubiquitous. Prostitution is ubiquitous. It seems to me that these things have always been ubiquitous and always will be. That said, I don't think that the people who object to rape porn and prostitution are uptight right-wingers. Quite the contrary--I assume they are decent, reasonable people who want to make the world a better place. I may also think that they are misguided and are beating their heads against a brick wall that will never fall, but I don't think the people making such arguments are uptight right-wingers.
ADEQUATE AT BEST--you may or may not be a misogynist based upon your response.

11. Calling feminists prudes and Puritans
In all fairness, the entire United States is prudish and Puritanical from my perspective, and we should not be surprised to find that many American feminists are prudish and Puritanical as well, but I don't think that either prudishness or Puritanism is what motivates our feminist allies. They seek a better world--for all people and not just women. I have never, as far as I can recall, responded to an argument by calling my verbal opponent either prudish or Puritanical.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

12. the sex-negative label
I have to admit that I am susceptible to the feeling that some feminists are sex-negative. That said, my belief is that the vast majority of us are sex-positive. Sex is good. It's healthy. It's loving. It's intense touch that we all need. I find it difficult to believe that many feminists are sex negative, but I also know a few women who are, in fact, sex-negative. It happens. None of the people I know to be feminists are sex-negative, however, so while I might assume that some feminists are sex-negative, that judgment does not apply to the feminists that I know. As such, I have never leveled that rhetorical attack against anyone.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

13. Calling women c...t and b....s
I don't use the C word. Never. I admit that I have, quite recently, in fact, used the B word (in private conversation, but never in public). I concede that neither word is acceptable in our discourse, and I certainly understand the objections that my feminist allies have to the use of these words.
ADEQUATE AT BEST--you may or may not be a misogynist based upon your response.

14. A whole slew of derogatory or sexualized comments about women's bodies
Personally, I adore women's bodies. I am biologically programmed to see them, appreciate them, and desire them. I keep this truth about myself hidden, most of the time, because I fear the repercussions of making an admission of this kind. I refrain from commenting on specific women's bodies (here and elsewhere) because I have been regularly reminded that it's not OK to express my very real and very human instincts.
ADEQUATE AT BEST--you may or may not be a misogynist based upon your response.

[font size=1]Internal note: Isn't it strange that I can profess to adore women's bodies, yet, at the same time, I suspect I will be judged as being a misogynist for doing so?[/font]

15. Portraying a view of women that makes it clear someone sees their only purpose as to provide them sex
I am unsure about what this test question is really asking. I have little doubt, however, that most men want sex. I'd go so far as to say that most people want sex, and most of us seek it from the opposite sex. None of us is dumb enough to believe that the only value of the opposite sex is that sex's ability to provide us with sex, yet I fear that I fail on this question because I admit that I do want to have sex--with a woman. There are many other things that I value about Mrs. Laelth, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't particularly value her ability and willingness to satisfy my very human need for sex. I am not really sure how to grade myself on this question, but I will assume that I failed.
BAD--you are a misogynist.

16. anti-choice positions
You'll see none of that from me. As I noted above, medical decisions should be the complete prerogative of a doctor and his or her patient. I have never advocated denying a woman's right (or a man's right) to control what medical procedures are performed on their respective bodies.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

17. opposing ACA's covering of women's reproductive care
No. I am quite glad that the ACA covers reproductive care for women.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

18. blaming women for their own sexual assaults
As far as I can recall, I have never done this, nor do I think there are many occasions upon which it might be just to do so.
ADEQUATE AT BEST--you may or may not be a misogynist based upon your response.

19. arguing that violence against women isn't important
I firmly believe that violence against other humans is bad and that it's an important issue for us to discuss. The absolute fact that men are vastly more likely to be the victims of violence seems to escape some of my feminist allies, but I will firmly state that this is a very important issue--for all of us.
ADEQUATE AT BEST--you may or may not be a misogynist based upon your response.

20. arguing that rape isn't a societal problem
Rape is a societal problem. It may also be a genetic problem. It may be inherent to the human race. I simply do not know, but I firmly believe that rape is a problem. I note that rape is an enormous problem in our prison-industrial complex, and that in that environment, most of the victims are men, but I would never deny that rape is a serious societal problem.
ADEQUATE AT BEST--you may or may not be a misogynist based upon your response.

21. Insisting a misogynistic mass murderer had real concerns about how bad off men have it today
Men are struggling in this day and age. I might even go so far as to suggest that men are "bad off," from what I can tell, but that certainly doesn't excuse the behavior of any misogynistic mass murderer. The problem I have with this test question is that it assumes that anyone who notes the plight of men is automatically deemed a misogynist.
BAD--you are a misogynist.

22. denying sexism and misogyny
No. Sexism is real, and misogyny is real. On the other hand, I have this sense that men who "hate" women really "hate" themselves--they hate the fact that they desire and need women. They don't "hate" women, per se. Quite the contrary. They love and desire women. What they "hate" is their own biological code that compels them to want and desire women. I think it's self-loathing, mostly. That said, I suspect that my expressed opinion here indicates a lack of "understanding" of this problem, so I fail on this test question.
BAD--you are a misogynist.

23. arguing that women in the US should be content with what they have
No. I expect everyone to advocate for their own interests. I have no problem with women who advocate for their interests and the interests of their peers.
GOOD--you are a tolerable human being and do not require "educating" on this topic.

24. Citing a study held out by an MRA big-wig that claims women say no when they really mean yes
I am not familiar with the study (or studies) in question, but, on the issue of sex, only the densest among us would argue that a "no" sometimes means "yes." Even if that were true, and, in some circumstances I suspect it is true, it's stupid to risk one's freedom and livelihood with uncertainty, and I have to take a "no" to mean "no" regardless of the speaker's actual intentions. This seems prudent to me.
ADEQUATE AT BEST--you may or may not be a misogynist based upon your response.

25. Insisting consent is "elastic"
Here, I fail entirely. In my experience, consent is elastic. It can be given and then withdrawn at any time. This has been the source of much conflict, but I don't see a clear path to avoid this conflict in the future.
BAD--you are a misogynist.

26. Insisting that consent is assumed.
In some circumstances, I think it's fair to assume consent. I don't want to live in a world in which a written contract is required (to insure consent) before every sex act. In cases where a person argues that consent was never given, however, as I said above, my instinct is to believe the accuser because the social costs of reporting rape are so very high that I assume the frequency of false reports of rape is very low. Nevertheless, in most cases, I think it's fair to assume consent. Thus, I fail this test question.
BAD--you are a misogynist.

27. Insisting there is no such thing as male privilege
I firmly believe that male privilege exists. I also believe that female privilege exists. Men have some advantages. Women have other advantages. I suspect that the fact that I note that women have certain advantages that men do not have causes me to instantly fail on this question.
BAD--you are a misogynist.

28. Men telling women they aren't real feminists because they disagree with them on an issue like porn or prostitution
I have no idea what a "real" feminist is. Oddly enough, I consider myself a feminist--and so would 90% of the people who have ever met me, but it's clear that I am not "pure" enough for some feminists (as this quiz demonstrates). Personally, I welcome disagreement on a host of issues--especially sticky ones like porn and prostitution. That said, I have never accused anyone of not being a "real" feminist.
ADEQUATE AT BEST--you may or may not be a misogynist based upon your response.

So, here's my score on this 28 question test:

GOOD: 11
BAD: 7
ADEQUATE: 10

What does that make me? Am I a misogynist?

I invite you to take the test for yourself. I found it quite interesting. Admittedly, I scored this test myself based upon my own understanding of the concerns and arguments of my DU feminist allies, but I feel my self-scoring was honest in this context. If you think I should have scored myself differently on a given question, I'd be happy to hear what you have to say.

Good luck!

-Laelth