Birds and the Cats

[LancetChick]

1. Ok, ok, my cats kill birds.

And they eat them. There are feathers and a few bird chunks near the door on my deck that I failed to clean up, which I was thinking of when the police officers came in the middle of the night tonight. I have a front door, but I awoke to sounds of voices and crunching and to flashlights on the dead bird deck. I turned on the outdoor light and opened the door and there were two police officers wondering why I had called 911 and what the emergency was. My first thought was "what the fuck have the cats done?" (they're inside at night).

I explained that there was no emergency, that I had not called 911, that I was asleep and that my last known activity was drinking wine and searching for petunia varieties to start for this summer's window boxes, and I silently hoped that the dead bird remains would not inspire them to wonder if there was a secret laboratory here in which medical experiments were conducted. The officer said that in areas like mine odd things trigger 911 calls from phone lines, and he asked for an alternate number to confirm in case this happens again, and they took their flashlights and went off into the wild black yonder. Well, the phone lines ARE funky in this rural(ish) area.

My cats do impact the environment, but right now I just want to forget about it and go to sleep.