For Lumberg....(Whom I secretly loved)
Oh little kitty. What have you done?
In all of your innocence, in all of your fun...
Silent eyes stare, as if to say "It wasn't ME who made the mess today!"
Upturned the chairs, the couch on it's side...
"What the hell happened here!?" I started to cry!
Oh little kitty....I know it was you...
Who barfed on my carpet, and pooed in my shoe!
Toilet Paper strewn about, like Halloween on crack.
My house has been completely destroyed, you stupid fucking cat!
I KNOW it was you kitty! Getchyer ass over here!
But then shitty kitty took off outta fear...
Wild with rage, I flew through the house!
Not a creature was supposed to be stirring, not even a mouse.
But on came the lights, and a hot mess did ensue.
That kitty was asking for it, a debt did accrue.
Every other mess, shitty kitty got away with it.
Under the bed he flew, cause his ass needed to be kicked.
But not this mess shitty kitty, this has happened for the last time.
This time you're NOT getting away with it, your ass is officially MINE.
This is the last of my Venus flytrap plants, I will ever find you eating!
Because today is the day my foot and your ass, will officially be meeting.
You wont ever mess with my house again, my carpet will stay intact.
There will be no more of this cleaning for me, and that's a freakin' fact.
So go ahead and hide, shitty little kitty. You'll STILL get a broom to the face.
Maybe I should just go find a better kitty to take your freakin' place!
= new reply since forum marked as read
But it is funny how those kitties still survive....and we never quite get our revenge for all the work they put us through. They are too smart, they let us expend all our energy trying to catch them and we don't have enough in us to give them what they deserve.
Welcome to DU. 
